ICE cries about “rhetoric,” Trump nukes watchdog laws with a wink, and the DOJ duct-tapes justice to a golf cart for a midnight joyride. Zelenskyy gets war crimes; Trump gets Risk strategies. Epstein files close in, lobbyists sweat bullets, and Congress plays whack-a-mole with reality.

🔊 News that punches, drinks, and curses at the moon.

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