Not Done Yet: A Podcast for Midlife Women

I was looking in the mirror the other day, a week after I dermaplaned my face, and I swear I had a full beard. It was blonde, thank goodness, but still. I sat there and thought: I am just really tired of being surprised by my own body.

That's midlife. The hair grows, the symptoms show up uninvited, and all you can do is laugh.

But something else is happening at the same time. While my body does its absolute most, I want more than I ever have. More experiences. More honesty. More of the life I kept putting off. More for myself.

In this episode, I'm talking about why I think the physical changes and the internal expansion are happening together, and why wanting more at this age is not a problem. It's the whole point.

If you've ever told yourself "I'm too old for that" or "that ship has sailed," this one is for you.

In this episode:

- Why I'm so tired of being surprised by my own body
- The cultural message that midlife women are supposed to get quieter and smaller, and why I'm not buying it
- How I'm retraining myself to say "this is the era of me" without the guilt
- A comment on one of my TikToks that I can't stop thinking about
- Why audacity is not a bad word
- What choosing yourself actually means (hint: it's not a nail appointment)
- Why your dream can still happen even if it looks a little different
- The gift of perspective we have as midlife women
- A first look at what I'm planning for 2027


If this one hit home, send it to a friend who needs the reminder that she is not done yet.

Find me on Instagram and TikTok at @rachelaperry. I love hearing what you want more of.

Want to be in a room with women who talk about the chin hairs and the big dreams? Join the waitlist for the next Midlife Meetup: [LINK]

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

Episode 30 is a milestone for this podcast, and it's the episode I wish someone had played for me years ago.

At 44, I left a business partnership without a clear plan. All I had was a quiet, persistent knowing that I was meant for something more. What followed was a bumpy year, a business divorce, and six years of walking through what felt like mud. There were days I didn't know if I was moving forward or just moving.

This isn't the highlight reel. It's the real version.

If you know something has to change but you can't see what comes next, this one is for you.

In this episode:

- Why I left a business that made almost a million dollars a year, without a plan

- What the in-between season looks like from the inside: not dramatic, just one foot in front of the other

- The honest answer I gave a woman who asked how I got through it

- Why clarity comes because you moved, not before

- Why you don't need the whole path, only the next step

- Why not quitting today is enough

If this one hit home, send it to a woman who needs to hear it today.

If you're in the mud right now and want to talk, find me on Instagram and TikTok at @rachelaperry. I love these conversations.

Want to be in a room with women who get it? Join the waitlist for the next Midlife Meetup: midlifemeetups.me

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

Something happened at our first Midlife Meetup that I can't stop thinking about.

Women walked into a brewery not knowing a single person. Some drove an hour to get there. And within about 20 minutes, we had moved right past the small talk and were discussing vaginas, sex, hair loss, hormones, red light therapy and all the other completely normal things nobody bothered to warn us about.

And I looked around the room and thought:

This is what we're missing.

Because midlife is a weird paradox.

In some ways, we've never been more ourselves. We care less about what everyone thinks. We're more willing to walk away from drama. We're taking risks, trying new things and getting clearer about who we actually are.

And yet, somehow, this can also be one of the loneliest and most confusing seasons of our lives.

The friendships that once happened automatically because of school drop-off, soccer practice, neighborhoods, work or our kids don't necessarily fit the same way anymore.

The roles that defined us are changing.

Our bodies are doing things nobody prepared us for.

And the more real we become, the more we crave relationships where we can actually be real.

In this episode, I'm talking about what I learned from our first Midlife Meetup, why some friendships naturally fade in this season, the shame we sometimes carry around our changing bodies, and why I believe some of the most meaningful relationships of our lives may still be ahead of us.

Because maybe losing some of the things that used to define us isn't evidence that something has gone wrong.

Maybe midlife is editing our lives.

Less pretending.
Less drama.
Less trying to be liked by everyone.

More honesty.
More courage.
More of the women we actually are.

And maybe the women who feel the most alone right now are standing right on the edge of finding the people they've been looking for.

Sister, the best is yet to come.

🎙️ Press play for a very real conversation about friendship, bodies, loneliness, connection, and why I believe we're entering our magic era.

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

Nobody really warns you that friendship changes in midlife.

When our kids were younger, connection often happened automatically. We met other moms at preschool, soccer games, school events, birthday parties and carpools. We didn't necessarily have to go find our people. Life kept putting us in rooms together.

And then one day, the scaffolding that held those friendships together starts disappearing.

The kids get older. Schedules change. People move. Friendships drift. And suddenly, making friends requires something many of us haven't had to do in years:

We have to do it on purpose.

In this episode, I'm talking about the loneliness I think a lot of women experience in midlife, even when we're surrounded by people who need us.

Because being busy isn't the same as being connected.

And having people who need you isn't the same as having people who see you.

I'm sharing why the response to my first Midlife Meetup surprised me, my own very imperfect history with friendship, why some friendships naturally fade as our lives change, and what happened when I recently found myself sitting in a room full of midlife women talking about the real stuff.

The periods. The bodies. The sex. The kids. The identity shifts. The weirdness of this entire season.

Nothing needed to be fixed.

It just felt really freaking good to be around women who got it.

Maybe that's something we're craving more than we realize.

So if you've looked around lately and wondered where your people went, or you've felt lonely even though your life is incredibly full, this episode is for you.

Maybe you don't need to get your old friendships back.

Maybe it's time to find your midlife people on purpose.

And sister, if you're looking for one of them, you've got one here.

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

Everyone talks about midlife like this magical space is supposed to open up. The kids get older, our roles change, and suddenly we have all this time to figure out what we want next.

Except nobody told my family.

The day I planned to record this episode, every single person in my family needed me. At the same time, I had deadlines, was adjusting to a new work schedule, and had just launched something that scared the crap out of me: the first Midlife Meetup.

And then it sold out. Actually, it oversold.

In this episode, I’m talking about the messy reality of trying to figure out what you want while still being the person everyone else needs.

We talk about:

•  Why midlife doesn’t come with the clean handoff we expected 
•  The 47-tabs-open feeling of being everything to everybody 
•  What happened when I finally launched Midlife Meetups 
•  Why putting yourself back on your own list can feel so unfamiliar 
•  How to keep showing up for the people you love without disappearing inside their needs 

Maybe figuring out what’s next doesn’t happen when everybody stops needing us.

Maybe we have to learn how to hear ourselves while they still do.

Because you’re Not Done Yet.

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

What if the thing you want is still completely possible, but the way you get there looks nothing like what you imagined?

This episode started with a conversation about my son choosing a college major and my sudden realization that my husband and I were giving him advice based on the tiny database of possibilities that we know exist.

And then I realized something slightly uncomfortable.

I do the exact same thing to myself.

We think we’re looking at this huge field of possibilities for our lives, but most of the time, we’re looking at what we already know. What we’ve experienced. What we’ve watched other people do. What someone told us was realistic.

It’s like trying to draw a map using only the roads we’ve already traveled and then assuming those are the only roads that exist.

In this episode, I’m talking about:

•  The conversation about my son’s future that made me rethink my own 
•  How I accidentally turned a financial goal into “my business has to make this happen” 
•  Why an open door doesn’t automatically mean it’s the right door for you 
•  What some very unexpected brand opportunities taught me about staying open 
•  Why starting Midlife Meetups feels scary precisely because it doesn’t look like what I’ve done before 
•  The part-time preschool job that makes absolutely no sense on paper but somehow feels like a door I’m supposed to walk through 
•  Why we can hold onto what we want while loosening our grip on how it has to happen 

This is not about sitting around waiting for God, the universe, or somebody else to drop your next chapter in your lap.

We still have to move.

Apply for the job. Start the thing. Have the conversation. Send the email. Walk through the door that feels like yours to walk through.

But maybe we can stop demanding that every move prove where it’s going before we’re willing to make it.

Because how many possibilities do we miss simply because they don’t look like the possibility we pictured?

So this week, instead of only asking, How am I going to make this happen?, try asking:

What possibilities am I not considering because I don’t know they exist yet?

You probably won’t have an answer. That’s kind of the freaking point.

Keep moving. Keep paying attention. And leave some room for the roads you can’t see from where you’re standing right now.

Because you are Not Done Yet.

If this episode makes you think of another woman navigating her own “what the hell is next?” season, send it to her. We need more reminders that none of us have to have the whole map figured out yet.

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

We say we want a sign.

From God. From the universe. From our intuition. Anything that tells us, Yes, this is the thing. Go do it.

But if we’re being real, most of us don’t actually want a sign.

We want a freaking billboard.

We want to know what to do, how to do it, whether it will work, what people will think, and preferably how the whole thing turns out before we take the first step.

In this episode, I’m talking about what happens when we stop waiting for certainty and start paying attention to the breadcrumbs that might already be there.

I’m also sharing what this has looked like in my own life as I’ve tried to figure out what’s next for my business and finally admitted something I’ve been pushing away for a long time: I want to get women in a room.

That little nudge has turned into Midlife Meetups, and I still don’t know exactly where it’s going.

But maybe I don’t need to.

In this episode, we’re talking about:

•  Why asking for a sign is often really asking for a guarantee 
•  The idea I kept pushing away because I didn’t know what to do with it 
•  Why something that keeps coming back might be worth getting curious about 
•  How Midlife Meetups came from finally paying attention to what I already knew 
•  Why nervousness doesn’t always mean “don’t do it” 
•  The difference between a random thought and something that keeps tapping you on the shoulder 
•  What it looks like to take one tiny step without knowing where the whole trail leads 

Maybe you don’t need another sign. Maybe the better question is:

What have I already been shown that I keep dismissing?

You don’t have to turn the answer into a five-year plan. You don’t have to know if it will work. You don’t even have to know where it’s going.

Maybe you just need to follow the next breadcrumb.

And if there’s something you’ve been thinking about, wanting, or feeling pulled toward that makes you a little nervous, maybe this is the week to get scared and take one tiny step toward it.

Because, sister, you are Not Done Yet.

Want to learn more about Midlife Meetups?
Head to midlifemeetups.me to get on the list and hear about upcoming Meetups.

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

At some point in midlife, your body starts doing things you definitely did not approve.

Suddenly you need physical therapy even though you didn’t actually injure yourself. You own approximately 95 pairs of reading glasses. Heels have been replaced by sneakers. Random hairs are showing up in places nobody invited them. And apparently sneezing is now a full-body event.

But underneath all the WTF moments, there’s something else happening.

Our bodies are changing. And maybe part of what makes that so hard isn’t vanity at all. Maybe we’re grieving the familiarity of the bodies we’ve known for decades.

In this episode, we’re talking about:

•  Why my first trip to physical therapy sent me into a minor midlife identity crisis 
•  The moment I realized I had officially entered my sneaker era 
•  Reading glasses, facial hair, long boobs, and all the things nobody adequately prepared us for 
•  Why changing hormones, joints, skin, eyesight, and energy can feel like living in someone else’s body 
•  The grief and sadness that can come with a body that doesn’t feel as familiar anymore 
•  What changed for me when I stopped looking at these things as evidence that my body was betraying me 
•  Learning to ask, “What is my body trying to tell me?” instead of fighting every change 

Maybe our bodies aren’t betraying us.

Maybe they’re saying, Girl, we’ve been doing this for 50-something years. We’re going to need to do a few things differently now.

And maybe taking care of the body we have now, instead of constantly comparing it to the one we used to have, is part of figuring out this whole midlife thing.

If you listen and find yourself saying, “SAME, girl, same,” send this episode to a friend who needs to know she isn’t the only one.

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

When was the last time you asked yourself what you actually want? Not what your kids need, what makes the most sense for your family, what you should do next, or what everyone else thinks is a good idea. What do you want? 

I’ve been sitting with that question after someone recently told me I still wasn’t choosing myself. My first reaction was, are you kidding me? I left a seven-figure business at 45, started over, launched this podcast, and began building something I genuinely care about. But then I realized how often I was still looking outside myself for answers. And it made me wonder how many of us have become so good at knowing what everyone else needs that we’ve forgotten how to hear ourselves.

In this episode, we talk about:

• The comment that made me question whether I was actually choosing myself
• Why making big changes in your life doesn’t automatically mean you’ve learned to trust your own voice
• How years of motherhood, caretaking, advocating, working, and managing everyone’s needs can make it surprisingly hard to answer, “What do I want?”
• Why figuring out your next chapter doesn’t have to begin with finding your purpose or mapping out the next five years
• The smaller questions I think are far more interesting right now, including what sounds fun, what you’re curious about, and what would bring you joy
• Why wanting something for yourself can feel uncomfortable when you’ve spent years automatically considering everyone else first
• What breweries have to do with all of this and why there may need to be a Not Done Yet brewery experience in our future

You don’t need to walk away from this episode knowing exactly what you want to do with the rest of your life. Maybe that’s putting way too much pressure on the question. Instead, start paying attention again. 

Ask yourself what sounds fun, what you’re curious about, or what you keep wanting even when there’s no practical reason for wanting it. Your answer might not come immediately, especially if you haven’t asked yourself in years. 

For now, the point is to start asking again: What do I want?

And if you know another woman who needs this reminder today, send her this episode because none of us were meant to carry midlife alone.

Ready to stop circling the thing you can't stop thinking about? Take the free Not Done Yet Spark and discover your next step.

www.rachelaperry.com/spark 

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me

Who decided I was behind?

If you've ever looked around and thought...

"Everyone else seems further ahead than me."

This episode is for you.

This week, I'm unpacking something I've been quietly carrying myself: the feeling that somehow I'm behind.

Behind financially.

Behind professionally.

Behind compared to everyone else who seems to have life figured out.

But after an honest conversation with my sister about saving for our kids' college—and realizing the story I'd been telling myself wasn't even true—I started asking a different question:

Who decided I was behind in the first place?

In this episode, we talk about the invisible timeline so many of us are measuring ourselves against, why comparison is usually based on stories we've created, and why what feels like failure is often grief for the life we imagined we'd have by now.

We talk about:

•  Why so many women feel like they're "behind" in midlife 
•  The invisible timeline we've inherited without realizing it 
•  The vulnerable conversation I had about college savings and the assumptions I was making 
•  Why comparison is almost always based on incomplete information 
•  The difference between failure and grief 
•  Learning to stop measuring your life against someone else's highlight reel 
•  A simple question to ask the next time comparison creeps in 

A question to take with you:

The next time you catch yourself thinking someone else is further ahead...

Ask yourself:

"Do I actually know that's true?"

Because maybe...

You're not behind at all. Maybe you're exactly where you're meant to be.

If this episode resonated with you, I'd love to hear from you.

Come find me on Instagram and tell me:

When have you felt "behind"... only to realize you were comparing yourself to a story you'd made up?

And if you know another woman who needs this reminder today, send her this episode. Because none of us were meant to carry midlife alone.

Midlife is weird. We shouldn't have to figure it out alone.

Get on the Midlife Meetups list to be the first to know when we're getting together near you or online. No networking. No awkward elevator pitches. Just real women, real conversation, and a reminder that you're definitely not the only one wondering what the hell is happening in this season of life.

Go to midlifemeetups.me