Not Just Money

Why do we show up differently in different spaces — at work, at home, online, with friends, with family? And how does that shape the way we spend, save, compare, and perform? In this episode of Not Just Money, Doretta and Li explore the concept of the performative self — the curated versions of ourselves we present to the world — and how modern life, social media, and consumer culture amplify that performance.

This is one of the most introspective and thought‑provoking episodes yet, blending psychology, identity, money behaviour, and the emotional pressures of living in a hyper‑visible digital world.

You’ll learn:

What the “performative self” actually means — and why we all have multiple selves

How identity shifts across contexts: work, family, friendships, parenting, leadership

Why authenticity doesn’t mean sameness — and why context matters

How money becomes one of the biggest stages we perform on

Why spending often communicates status, belonging, competence, or aspiration

How shame and comparison shape financial decisions

How social media destabilizes identity through constant visibility and curated perfection

Why consumer culture profits from insecurity — and how to resist it

The psychological impact of lifestyle inflation, FOMO, beauty filters, and status signalling

How to recognize when you’re performing for others instead of living your values

Signs you’re living from authenticity rather than performance

The key question that cuts through social pressure: “Would this still matter if no one knew about it?”

This episode helps you understand why you make certain money decisions — not just how. It’s about reclaiming your identity, aligning your choices with your values, and resisting the pressure to perform for audiences who aren’t actually watching.

Good talk.

Home ownership has long been sold as the cornerstone of financial security — but is that still true? In this episode of Not Just Money, Doretta and Li take a deep, honest look at the myths, realities, and emotional pressures surrounding buying a home in Canada today. From skyrocketing housing prices to generational differences, cultural expectations, and the rise of parental co‑signing, this conversation challenges the belief that owning a home is the only path to stability.

They explore:

Why Millennials and Gen Z face dramatically lower homeownership rates than Boomers and Gen X

How housing prices have outpaced wages in major cities like Toronto and Vancouver

The historical truth: home ownership wasn’t always the Canadian norm

Why post‑WWII policies — not just market forces — created the homeownership boom

The psychological impact of renting, multigenerational living, and cultural expectations

The risks of being “house poor” and relying solely on home equity for retirement

The rise of the “Bank of Mom and Dad” — gifts, co‑signing, and inheritances

Why co‑signing can put parents’ retirement at risk

How much home you really need vs what social pressure tells you

Renting as a financially valid strategy — not “throwing money away”

Why investing the difference between renting and owning can build real wealth

How home ownership fits into a broader financial plan (RRSPs, TFSAs, emergency funds, lifestyle goals)

This episode is a grounded, practical guide for anyone feeling overwhelmed by the housing market or pressured to buy before they’re ready. Whether you’re renting, saving, considering buying, or rethinking your financial priorities, this conversation gives you clarity, context, and confidence.

We know that our decisions can be driven by our emotions, good and bad. In today’s episode our hosts are going to look at the triad of emotions that can take us to some really dark corners – embarrassment, guilt and the big kahuna, shame.

First, defining these separate but related emotions is critical to understand how they impact us and ultimately how they can derail our financial futures. What we internalize as our truths and as our identities can shape how we manage and view money.

Second, Doretta and Li talk about how these emotions get translated in a financial context. How they show up in our financial decisions and what red flags to look out for.

Finally, it’s about how we rewire and rewrite the story so we can all retire rich.

Social media is no longer just a place to scroll — it’s a marketplace engineered to influence your emotions, your choices, and your spending. In Part 2 of our deep dive into social media advertising, Doretta and Li uncover the hidden machinery behind influencer culture, bot farms, AI‑generated personas, fake engagement, and the psychological tricks that make digital persuasion so powerful.

If you’ve ever wondered whether what you’re seeing online is real, this episode will change how you scroll.

You’ll learn:

How influencers actually make money — sponsorships, affiliate links, platform payouts, paid communities, and even gift registries

Why micro‑influencers (10K–100K followers) are now a $32B industry

How bots and bot farms inflate follower counts, likes, and comments

Why some influencers buy fake engagement — and how to spot it

The rise of AI‑generated influencers 

How fake accounts, fake reviews, and fake “experts” flood your feed

Why platforms remove billions of fake accounts every year

How AI‑driven targeting predicts what you’ll want before you know you want it

The psychological impact of influencer culture: comparison anxiety, lifestyle inflation, FOMO, and distorted beauty standards

How to identify bot‑driven accounts, AI‑generated content, and synthetic authenticity

Why skepticism is your best friend — and how to protect your mental health and your wallet

This episode gives you the tools to recognize manipulation, slow down impulse buying, and navigate social media with clarity instead of overwhelm.

Good talk.

Social media advertising isn’t just annoying — it’s engineered. In this episode of Not Just Money, Doretta and Li break down how today’s digital ecosystem tracks you, predicts you, manipulates you, and sells to you… often without you realizing it. From fake product tests to AI‑generated influencers, disappearing ads, and micro‑targeted manipulation, this episode exposes the truth behind the feeds we scroll every day.

You’ll learn:

How algorithms track every click, pause, scroll, and hover

Why social media ads feel “perfectly timed” — and how predictive AI makes that happen

The rise of AI‑generated influencers and synthetic authenticity

Why micro‑influencers (10K–100K followers) are now a $32B industry

How platforms scrape data, match emails, and build psychological profiles

Why traditional advertising rules don’t translate cleanly to social media

What Canadian regulations do cover — and why enforcement is nearly impossible

How fake reviews, bots, and disappearing ads distort your buying decisions

How to spot disguised ads, engineered intimacy, and influencer manipulation

The real risks behind “too perfect” product recommendations

How to report misleading or harmful ads on major platforms

Why critical thinking is your strongest defense online

This episode is your guide to navigating the wild west of social media advertising — where nothing is fully real, everything is optimized, and you are always being watched.

If you’ve ever wondered whether you can trust what you see online, this conversation will change how you scroll.

Next week: Part 2 — How to spot the bot, verify claims, and protect yourself from digital manipulation.

Good talk.

Links:

Canadian law: https://competition-bureau.canada.ca/en/deceptive-marketing-practices/types-deceptive-marketing-practices/misleading-representations-and-deceptive-marketing-practices

Competition Bureau Canada: https://competition-bureau.canada.ca/en

Ad Standards – submit a complaint: https://adstandards.ca/complaints/how-to-submit-a-complaint/

Report Fraud: https://reportcyberandfraud.canada.ca

Tax season is finally over—so now what? In this episode of Not Just Money, Li and Doretta break down exactly what happens after you file your taxes, whether you owe money, expect a refund, or are still recovering from the emotional rollercoaster of dealing with the CRA.

Li shares her own “ouch” moment paying her tax bill, while Doretta recalls the panic of opening a surprise CRA letter (“I still remember the feeling in the pit of my stomach… it was awful”). Together, they unpack the real steps Canadians should take once their return is submitted—and how to avoid penalties, interest, and unnecessary stress.

You’ll learn:

How long refunds take (NETFILE vs. paper filing)

What delays your return: reviews, mismatched info, missing slips, incorrect banking details

What happens if you owe—and why you must file even if you can’t pay

CRA penalties: 5% late‑filing fee + 1% per month (up to 12 months), doubled for repeat offenders

How to set up payment arrangements and why contacting CRA early reduces stress

Why newcomers are especially vulnerable to CRA scams

The psychology behind tax refunds and “found money”

What Canadians plan to do with refunds this year:

28% paying down debt

22% covering weekly expenses

28% contributing to RRSPs/TFSAs

Only 9% splurging

Smart ways to use your refund: debt first, then emergency fund, savings, investments

Why adjusting payroll deductions may be better than chasing refunds

As Li puts it, “If you’re paying taxes, you’re doing alright.” And as Doretta reminds us, a refund isn’t free money—it’s your own cash coming back to you after the government used it interest‑free.

This episode is practical, reassuring, and full of real‑life stories that make tax season feel a little less intimidating—and a lot more manageable.

Links:

Paying the CRA: https://www.canada.ca/en/revenue-agency/services/payments/payments-cra/payment-arrangements.html

CRA numbers (who you gonna call?): https://www.canada.ca/en/revenue-agency/services/about-canada-revenue-agency-cra/when-you-money-collections-cra/contact-canada-revenue-agency-about-your-debt.html

When we talk about taxes in Canada, it is often about how high they are and how can we minimize the taxes we pay as individuals or corporations but what about the other side? Where does this money go? Who controls it?

In today’s episode, our hosts talk about what a progressive tax system means, breaks down where YOUR money/taxes go, and how you can have a say of how it gets spent.

As we near April 30th – make sure to file your taxes (seriously)! And this year, take these 30 minutes to learn about the Canadian tax system and how it supports our happiness, civil society, and wealth equalization.

Links:

Why you pay taxes: https://www.canada.ca/en/revenue-agency/services/tax/individuals/educational-programs/purpose-taxes.html

Canada Spends: https://canadaspends.com/en/tax-visualizer?province=ON&income=100000&year=2025

What does it mean when rich countries start sliding down the World Happiness Index? This year, Canada drops to 23rd from 18th place. Before that, they comfortably sat at #5. 

What happened? Did we collectively get crankier? Have things changed so drastically? Where would you sit on the ladder of happy? Join our co-hosts as they dive into both the complexities and the simplicity of what happiness is, and most importantly, what’s money got to do with it?

Links:

The World Happiness Report https://www.worldhappiness.report/

Canadian happiness stats https://data.worldhappiness.report/country/CAN

Doretta and Li go through the mail bag in this episode. From listeners who called them out on some of their stories/comments to those who provided their own helpful savings hacks. Join our hosts as they read the mail and share their answers in real time. Sometimes the questions and their answers surprised even themselves!

And don't miss the riveting finale of the push-pop saga.

Almost 60% of Canadians have or will be renewing their mortgages in short order. This week’s episode dives into Li’s own mortgage renewal drama. Mortgages are complicated and go beyond what your rate is. There is often a lot more to consider before getting into one and renewing one. Hear about the horror stories of sharing names and birthdays with other people and their assets to getting approved for too much home.

Warning: Mortgages are not a joke and is generally considered to be the biggest debt you will take on in your lifetime. Make sure to get professional advice from an accredited mortgage broker or mortgage specialist.

We are off next week – for those of you who celebrate Easter, have a great holiday! See you in two weeks.