Not Us Podcast

Not Us Podcast

By Angela Samantha Kaaber KilianSociety & CulturePersonal Journals
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Not Us Podcast episodes

  • Receiving is a practice, not a personality trait.

    In this episode, Angela and Samantha reflect on their 21-Day Receiving Challenge and the surprisingly intense reality of “being open.” They talk about the difference between receiving help and asking for it, why busyness can become armor, and how worthiness and specificity shape what we allow into our lives.


    You’ll hear:

    • Why receiving isn’t one-size-fits-all

    • The vulnerability of eye contact, asking, and being seen

    • A leadership perspective on overload and psychological safety

    • How to create space for what you’re asking for

    • Why “deserving” and “receiving” aren’t the same thing

    If you’ve been doing the most but still feel blocked, this conversation might land a little too accurately.


    The 21-Day Receiving Challenge is available anytime on our IG.


    #NotUsPodcast #Receiving #PersonalDevelopment #SelfAwareness #WomenEmpowerment


    36 min
  • After a long-term relationship ends, when is the right time to date again?

    One year post-breakup, Samantha steps into the hot seat as we explore modern dating - from Tinder and Bumble to sexuality filters, red flags, first-date dynamics, and the real question underneath it all:

    "Are you dating to be chosen… or are you choosing?"

    Together with co-host Angela and our resident family Yente, Brett, we talk about:

    • Healing before dating

    • Casual vs intentional dating

    • Dating apps in your 30s and 40s

    • Bisexual and pansexual identity

    • Who pays on a first date• Rejection, confidence and online safety

    • How to build a strong dating profile

    • And why you should start before you feel desperate


    This episode is funny, vulnerable and refreshingly honest about love, lust, and learning yourself again.


    Because dating isn’t about finding someone.It’s about rediscovering who you are now.

    #Dating #Tinder #ModernLove #BreakupRecovery #SingleLife #SelfDiscovery #NotUsPodcast


    1 hr 1 min
  • Leaving Faith, Coming Out & Rewriting Your Life | Brett Michael Innes
    • He trained to be a pastor.
    • He wore the purity ring.
    • He left the church.
    • And he came out.

    This week on Not Us, we sit down with filmmaker and author Brett Michael Innis to talk about faith deconstruction, coming out as an adult, rebuilding identity, and what courage actually feels like when your old life no longer fits.


    We unpack: – Leaving Christianity – Purity culture and shame – Creative self-censorship – Masculinity and feminine energy – The highs and lows of the arts – Telling stories that move people


    This is a conversation about change, choice, and the messy in-between — for anyone questioning, evolving, or rewriting their life.

    #NotUsPodcast #FaithDeconstruction #ComingOut #CreativeLife #LGBTQ #PersonalGrowth


    57 min
  • Valentine's Day: A day of love or another hyped commercialised holiday?

    Is Valentine’s Day romantic… or just a marketing scheme with overpriced roses and forced romance?

    This week, we’re calling it Love Day and talking about what love looks like when you’re not interested in performative gestures, public displays, or “romcom copy-paste” effort.


    We cover love languages (flowers vs quality time), why heartbreak changes your relationship with love, and the real question: what love do you need to give yourself first? Plus: our rally cry for 2026, be a rebel in love.

    #NotUsPodcast #ValentinesDay #LoveDay #Relationships #SelfLove #LoveLanguages


    53 min
  • Labels vs Identity (and how they shape belonging, freedom, and “who you’re being”) | Not Us

    In this episode, we talk about labels and identity and why it’s so easy for other people’s opinions to become the story you live under. From sexuality and assumptions (“the lesbian neighbour”) to career labels and being called “aggressive,” we explore how identity shifts across seasons of life and how labels can either help us belong or box us in.


    This isn’t a lecture. It’s a real sister-to-sister conversation about nuance, growth, and the question we keep coming back to: who are you being?

    #Identity #Labels #Belonging #PersonalGrowth #NotUsPodcast


    41 min
  • Stay, Shape, Exit: The Framework for When You’re Over Your Job

    January has people asking the same brutal question: “Can I really do another year like last year?” In this episode, Angela & Sam talk about the frustration of returning to work after the holidays, the emotional hangover of empty promises, and the quiet pressure to make a career decision fast.


    They introduce a practical framework: Stay, Shape, or Exit

    • Stay: What am I learning and building right now?
    • Shape: What needs to change to make this sustainable
    • Exit: What are my red lines, and what runway do I need?

    They also get real about the job market, fear-based hiring, salary shifts, AI, networking, and why interviews often come down to one thing: vibe.


    If you’re reassessing your role, job hunting, or trying to rebuild your career from a more empowered place, this episode will help you reset with clarity.


    38 min
  • Blue January: Navigating the Weirdest Month of the Year | Not Us Podcast

    January is weird. The festive lights disappear overnight, your energy is low, and somehow the world expects you to be refreshed, focused, and ready to plan your entire year by Wednesday.


    In this episode, Angela & Samantha talk about the January slump, the reality behind Blue Monday, and why winter is meant to be a slower, more inward season. They share practical ways to reset gently without forcing productivity: working with your natural rhythm, planning small things to look forward to, getting outside even when it’s freezing, and using simple daily habits (movement, nature, boundaries, and routines) to support your mind and body.

    If you’re feeling flat, overwhelmed, or like January is an “assault on your nervous system,” this one’s for you.


    Show notes: 📚 Breathe by Dr Ela Manga


    Keywords: January blues, Blue Monday, post holiday slump, winter reset, gentle habits, circadian rhythm, motivation vs discipline, mental health support


    Hashtags: #JanuaryBlues #GentleJanuary #BlueMonday #NotUsPodcast


    41 min
  • We survived two weeks with each other, and we're still friends | Not Us Podcast

    Happy 2026 and welcome back to Not Us Podcast. In this first episode after the holiday break, sisters Angela & Sam debrief the ultimate festive-season experiment: two weeks under one roof with Angela’s brother (the brother she grew up with), her partner Nathan, two dogs, and one highly strategic cat.

    It was joyful, chaotic, hilarious, deeply human… and surprisingly energising. They unpack what actually made it work: boundaries, shared responsibility, emotional maturity, the gift of a “judgment-free zone,” and how family dynamics shift when your family story doesn’t fit into a neat little box.

    You’ll hear about:

    • What it’s really like hosting family for two weeks
    • Navigating “tummy mom / heart mom” family dynamics (adoption + blended family stories)
    • How to create space for people to show up authentically
    • Why perfectionism often disguises procrastination
    • The art of debating sober… the morning after
    • Expanding your capacity to receive (help, love, generosity, opportunities)
    • The post-holiday emotional hangover and January crash landing

    If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by family gatherings, struggled to be yourself around relatives, or you’re entering a new year trying to do things differently without pretending life is perfect… this one’s for you.

    📩 Email us: [email protected]

    📍 Follow: Instagram + Facebook

    🎧 Listen on Spotify & Apple Podcasts | Watch on YouTube


    Keywords:we survived the holidays, post holiday reset, january crash, emotional hangover after christmas, family holiday debrief, hosting family for two weeks, boundaries with family, adoption family dynamics, blended family holidays, perfectionism and procrastination, intention setting 2026, not us podcast

    Hashtags: #WeSurvivedTheHolidays #PostHolidayReset #FamilyDynamics #Boundaries #AdoptionStory #BlendedFamily #Perfectionism #IntentionSetting #NotUsPodcast #Happy2026


    45 min
  • Surviving the Festive Season: Boundaries, Big Feelings & Finding Joy Again

    The holidays aren’t always holly-jolly, even for people who adore Christmas. In this festive episode, sisters Angela and Samantha explore what it really takes to survive the season: the joy, the chaos, the emotional landmines and the quiet moments in between.


    They unpack:

    • Hosting Christmas in a new home and new relationship

    • Family dynamics and shifting guest lists

    • Christmas as a newly single woman after 18 years

    • Why some people feel intensely lonely or overwhelmed during the season

    • The pressure to create a “perfect” holiday

    • Setting boundaries without guilt

    • Simple acts of kindness that make a real difference

    • Dealing with the January slump and winter blues

    • How to find magic without losing yourself

    Honest, warm, a little sparkly and beautifully human, this episode is a reminder that Christmas doesn’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. Whether you’re navigating big emotions, big families or big expectations, you’re not alone.


    📧 Email: [email protected] 📲 Instagram & Facebook: @notuspod 🎧 Listen on Spotify, Apple, and YouTube.


    Hashtags (if visible on platform): #HolidaySeason #FestiveStress #Christmas2025 #LonelinessAtChristmas #FamilyDynamics #NotUsPodcast #WinterBlues

    35 min
  • Why World AIDS Day Still Matters: A Conversation on Awareness and Stigma

    Join Angela and Samantha on the Not Us Podcast, where they dive deep into the significance of World AIDS Day. In this episode, the sisters discuss the importance of raising awareness about HIV/AIDS, debunk common myths, and reflect on their own experiences growing up in South Africa. They emphasize the relevance of continuing the conversation around HIV/AIDS in today’s world, addressing the stigma related to the disease, and the critical role of education. Tune in as they highlight statistics, share personal anecdotes, and seek your input on this vital topic. Don't forget to like, share, comment, and subscribe!


    37 min

About Not Us Podcast

From the publisher's feed

A podcast hosted by two sisters and for people who are raw, real and curious about who they are becoming - one story at a time.