On Leading with Greatness

Real trust takes a lot more than a momentary exertion of empathy. In reality, the mechanics of trust can be complicated and dynamic, which is why the best leaders have a profound appreciation for trust and carefully cultivate and nurture it.

Despite everything we’re told (and perhaps believe) greatness doesn’t drive lasting progress. Goodness does. Greatness as we rate it has to do with one’s prominence, such as position, wealth, influence—all fleeting and limited. Meanwhile, true goodness tends toward the humble and yet can be far more persistent and powerful.

For years, I struggled to accept compliments with the grace they deserve. When praised, my mind would grumble, “What’s their angle” or “If only they knew…” I’d tell myself I needed to dismiss their recognition so I could “stay humble,” which really just reflected a limiting belief that I'm not deserving.

I have a confession to make. I’ve been misleading you—maybe even lying to you—for years. The fact that I’ve been lying to myself all that time doesn’t make it any better.

The lie I’ve been telling us all is that great leadership will lead to business success. In fact, I know of no studies or slam-dunk examples that definitively demonstrate this claim. I’ve also said that bad bossing is incompetence in practice, which I maintain, but we can identify plenty of objectively bad bosses who are wildly successful.

The b******t is that so many people must seek mental health treatment of all sorts because of their jobs. No one should have to go to therapy because their boss is a dipshit bully, their colleagues are creeps, or their whole organization is a cesspool of toxic behavior. And yet we do. I’ve done it more than once and because of more than one noxious employer.

Great leaders know that creating general rules to address a single, narrow issue can result in unfortunate outcomes throughout an organization. It’s like taking a sledgehammer to a fruit fly.

One of the most challenging aspects of leadership is countering, neutralizing, and helping others cope with bullies. Every bully is a fraud—a weakling and a coward—and deep down they know it. We all do.

Have you ever seen the British version of The Office? The office manager, David Brent, presents himself as a benign leader, but he’s aggressively benign, and the show demonstrates amply that such a beast can be as toxic as the worst boss.

Humans love categories. We can’t get enough of slicing and dicing things into small parts and putting them each into their own cozy cubbyholes. We do all this because categories help us make sense of the world.

Classification serves a useful function,but such systems lack an inherent basis in reality. Great leaders recognize the mixed nature of our drive to taxonomize. Leaders also know that our very humanity renders classification ultimately counterproductive.

The best leaders think about systems of thought—their own and others’—to understand how leadership functions. They consider systems of thought when they make decisions or need to persuade. They contemplate when to press those systems and when to ease off.