Living in Response

On The Struggle of Finding "Purpose"


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Episode 032 of Living in Response is about the most present challenge in my life - finding my purpose. Purpose not in the ultimate sense, but in the how can I have an impact/share/give back sense.

Thank you for sharing your time with this raw (unedited, unfiltered, unbounded), stream-of-consciousness experiment in sharing what’s on my heart, in real-time <3

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ I Talked for 45 Minutes… and Forgot to Hit RecordI start by laughing (and crying a little inside) about a classic podcaster moment: 45 minutes of deep soul reflection spoken into the void. But maybe it was just what I needed to hear—for me, from me.

2️⃣ My Purpose Is to Be MeI reflect on my deepest knowing: that my purpose is to live the most me life I can, to serve from that place, and to look back with as few regrets as possible. But I also admit how easy it is to spiral into “But what is it really??”

3️⃣ The Great Purpose ParadoxSome days, I feel so clear. Other days, I’m questioning everything. I unpack the tension between knowing that my spiritual path is lifelong and also wanting to know now what I’m here to offer, teach, or share.

4️⃣ The Dharma Coach Who Can’t Answer Her Own Dharma QuestionsI get real about the cosmic irony of being a certified life purpose coach while still wrestling with my own sense of direction. I talk about self-inquiry fatigue and the weird, empowering, maddening layers of finding clarity.

5️⃣ Inner Exploration as My True NorthI share what’s at the core of my life: inner exploration. Whether it’s meditation, energy work, breath, yoga nidra, or cannabis-supported spiritual practice—this is my ground, my home, my realest real.

6️⃣ The Vulnerability of Sharing What Matters MostI reflect on why it feels so vulnerable to share my personal practices—not because they’re secret, but because they matter that much. It’s not someone else’s method. It’s the soul of my own path, and that makes it sacred.

7️⃣ Frameworks vs. Lived ExperienceI talk about the difference between teaching something you learned in a certification and sharing something you’ve lived. And how, for me, lived experience always hits deeper—even if it feels riskier to share.

8️⃣ Not Everything Is for Everyone (and That’s Okay)I remind myself that resonance is personal. Some folks won’t vibe with what I share—and that doesn’t have to mean anything. I share how creators who boldly share their truth inspire me to keep doing it a little afraid.

9️⃣ Releasing the Fear of “Getting It Wrong”I explore how childhood experiences taught me to fear being wrong—and how I’m re-parenting that part of me by allowing B-minus work, embracing imperfection, and trusting that I’ll survive the cringe.

🔟 My Partner Started Meditating (and My Heart Melted)I share a proud, tender moment about my partner quietly beginning a meditation practice—and how he’s even started sharing it with others. Not because I told him to, but because something real is blooming on its own.

1️⃣1️⃣ Inspiration Fatigue & Creative PressureI get honest about how even the most well-meaning content about creativity and purpose can be overwhelming. I reflect on how easy it is to get lost in the sauce when you just want to find your own way through.

1️⃣2️⃣ Why I’ve Been Avoiding JournalingEven as a lifelong journaler, I talk about why writing hasn’t felt aligned lately—and how speaking my truth out loud has become a different kind of medicine. I consider responding to prompts not with pen, but with voice.

1️⃣3️⃣ The Process Is the PurposeI remind myself that this podcast isn’t a performance—it’s a practice. That the messy middle, the not-knowing, the existential spirals are the point. This is art. This is life. This is purpose, unfolding in real time.

1️⃣4️⃣ Certifications, Lived Experience & ReadinessI reflect on how the trainings I’m doing now (like yoga nidra + meditation) are landing differently because I’ve already lived the practices. I’m not chasing identity—I’m deepening something I already know is mine.

1️⃣5️⃣ Human Design, Gate 28, and the Game of MeaningI end with a nod to my design: conscious sun in Gate 28, the Gate of Purpose. Of course I’m here to dance with these questions. Of course I’m here to feel it all. This episode is a snapshot of that sacred game in motion.

Mentions & Resources:🌿 Yoga Nidra, Meditation, and Inner Exploration🌀 Cannabis-Supported Somatic Spiritual Practice📘 Dharma Coaching & Purpose Inquiry💫 Human Design: Gate 28 (The Great Game Player)🧘‍♀️ Interoception, Energy Work, and Embodied Wisdom

Feeling so blessed and so grateful for all of the incredible souls who I’ve had the honor of sharing time and space with. Deep gratitude for Source/God/life/the universe/all that is for the opportunity to experience this life, frustrations and all :)

Mystically,

Belle



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Living in ResponseBy Mystically, Belle