Open Door

Matt leads Katie, Tara, and Kevin into their discussion of loving family well during the holidays.

Kevin begins by talking about expectations and anxiety. He references how we are told in Scripture that God is the only thing in our life that will never change; He is our constant.

Matt jumps in and shares that we have to be careful to not remove all our hope when we remove some of our expectations. Katie discloses that when we put a lot of expectations on someone, we are putting pressure on that relationship. Kevin points out that Jesus had an expectation that His disciples would help Him in Gethsemane, but when they didn't meet that expectation, He was still able to hope and turn to God for His strength.

Katie transitions into talking about the gap between our ideal self and our actual self. Kevin shares that we put expectations on ourselves that God doesn't even put on us; God expects us to yield to the Spirit, not do everything on our own. Kevin also asserts that we can't let social media or culture set our expectations.

Katie conveys that disappointment shouldn’t be treated as an enemy but as an ally to help us see the better substitute. Kevin implores listeners to take our emotional needs to God because He is big enough for them. Tara chimes in and says it's important to lay our needs and desires at God's feet. She references Revelation 4 as a passage that has provided her comfort and allowed her to reset.

The team wraps up by sharing that we get to chose how we respond to things like disappointment, so we need to look to God to show us how to respond.

For more information on this podcast, visit podcast.fellowshipknox.org 

After Katie Neely introduces Matt Scheuneman, Tara Havely, and Kevin Huggins, the four jump right in to talking about grief.

Kevin starts by explaining that grief is a signal emotion, and everyone experiences it differently. He talks specifically about the loss parents and divorced couples can feel.

Matt and Katie talk about how you can feel multiple things at once, like sadness and happiness.

Kevin and Matt transition to discussing miscarriages, and the grief that accompanies that. Matt mentions Lauren Morgan on Fellowship staff and Project Gabriel. 

The four spend time responding to grief and loss in this current season around COVID.

Matt then discloses the consequences of not dealing with grief and a loss. He shares that he feels there's been a reluctance by some to accept the losses during COVID. Matt says that we have to be willing to work through our grief, but we don't have to do it alone. He references C.S. Lewis' book 'A Grief Observed.' Kevin also brings up Jacob in the Old Testament and how he refused to be comforted and deal with his loss, and how detrimental it can be when we don't deal with our emotions.

Tara brings up again that grief is so unique to each person, but there are some things we can do to grieve well. She mentions allowing ourselves to cry and inviting the Lord to mourn with us. Matt and Tara reference Jesus, Lazarus, Mary, and Martha, and how Jesus weeps.

For more information on this podcast, visit podcast.fellowshipknox.org 

Rebekah starts the conversation by sharing that depression can lead to loneliness, isolation, and loss of feelings, and how important it is to open up to someone in your life about these things. Katie jumps in and shares something she heard once: Be authentic with all, transparent with some, and vulnerable with few.

Greg then brings up how important it is for us to be honest with and know ourselves. Katie reminds listeners that the Gospel tells you who you are, nothing else does. Brent brings up that a blessing of middle age is that you've had enough time with yourself to start to learn who you are and what makes you feel healthy, including exercise. 

On the flipside of this, Rebekah points out that depression can lead to you getting stuck on yourself. She references a book by Tim Keller about self-forgetfulness. Brent also says that depression can lead us to deepening our faith if we let it. He references some Scriptures that talk about this, a book by Chip Dodd, and another by Dr. Richard Beck.

Katie transitions into talking about finding hope in the midst of our circumstances, and how it's okay to bring our questions to God because He can handle them.

Matt then begins to discuss how to help people dealing with depression, and how to remind them that there can be a difference between reality and what their emotions are telling them is real. Rebekah emphasizes that listening to someone who's struggling with depression can be the best tool we have. Matt brings up a children's book that his son has that talks about listening. Brent also mentions that suggesting counseling to someone struggling with depression can be intimidating, but extremely helpful and loving. Rebekah brings up the story of Mary and Elizabeth as an example of how important it can be to minister and encourage someone going through something you went through.

For more information on this podcast, visit podcast.fellowshipknox.org 

With a rise in depression in students, and the subject of depression being on a lot of people's minds these days, Greg and Fellowship's counseling department start their conversation on depression with Brent as he dives in with some statistics and facts about depression.

Matt joins and speaks into the expectations of perfection in teens and young adults, and how that can lead to anxiety and depression. Greg also mentions how young peoples' foundations can be shaken when they move away from home or are learning things for themselves instead of relying on their family unit. Katie brings up Instagram and how the social media platform can cause issues in depression and self worth if you let it.

From there, the team consider depression in adults, with Greg sharing that depression can hit adults in their forties and fifties because their options in life are getting slimmer. Matt says that he thinks some of it is a hope issue for people in that area of life; you have to redefine your goals, he says, so that your goals are based on the things God has for you, not the things you think you lost.

Rebekah tells listeners more information about depression and shares some Biblical passages about depression and darker periods of our lives. Matt also joins in and shares that depression can also lead to feelings of numbness. Brent references a book by Paul David Tripp.

This leads into Matt spending some time sharing the difference between sadness and clinical depression. He compares sadness to lamenting, and references the book of Jeremiah as an example. Matt and Katie also convey that emotions are often signals that there's something else going on at a deeper level, and it's not healthy to leave those untreated. Matt encourages listeners to watch out for certain signals and to seek help if they need it.

Greg closes with the story of Lazarus, and how God ordains seasons in our lives for our good, even when it may not feel like it at the time.

For more information on this podcast, visit podcast.fellowshipknox.org 

Greg starts the episode by asking the question, "Does the Bible offer practical ways to overcome anxiety?" Katie is quick to point out that there's not a "magic button" to turn anxiety on and off; instead, she says that we should learn how to respond to anxiety in our lives and not think of anxiety as the enemy. Brent adds to this and says that God has to become bigger than the object of our anxiety.

Matt moves the conversation to the importance of knowing who God is - He is a God Who pursues us and He will not abandon us. Brent also brings up that God has adopted us and is a good Father to us just as He was to the Israelites.

As the discussion moves toward the purpose of suffering, Katie brings up Psalm 55. Brent jumps in and references Viktor Frankl's Man Search For Meaning, and Greg mentions how our suffering might help us comfort someone else suffering. Rebekah uses Hebrews 11 and John 15 to show how faith in God can be an anxiety reducer.

From there, the conversation moves into figuring out what to do when we feel God is being silent. Brent references what Crawford Lorrits calls "the gift of struggle." Greg brings up the difference between a stressful situation that is out of your control causing you anxiety, and a sin you are willfully committing causing you anxiety.

Matt and Katie then discuss taking a leap of faith and trusting God even in uncertain times. Rebekah voices that she never promises anything in a counseling session related to an end goal; it's a process, not something that's fixed in a snap. Brent agrees and states that you have to commit to deep reflection and allow space for your spiritual life to grow.

Brent then spends some time digging through Luke 12 Before Katie and Matt talk through some practical social anxiety tools.

For more information on this podcast, visit podcast.fellowshipknox.org 

As host, Greg introduces Brent, Matt, Rebekah, and Katie.

Matt shares first and talks about how previous generations took the approach of keeping their anxiety internal, whereas in our current generation, anxiety and struggling with anxiety is more of an external conversation that could be heightened by things like the pandemic and social media.

Rebekah, Brent, and Katie join the conversation by thinking through how to walk children through their anxiety as they learn and grow and take in new information. Rebekah voices how important it is to really listen to your children as they walk through their feelings and emotions, and both Matt and Katie articulate that it's necessary to let your children have their emotions and feelings even though your instinct as a parent might be to shield them from that.

Brent moves into some of the science behind anxiety, and shares how God instilled a fight-or-flight in us as His creation. He gives the Biblical example of Mary and Martha to show how worry can lead to us missing things from the Lord. Brent also shares how sin causes us to have a disconnect from God and each other, and can spiral into other psychological issues. Katie says that anxiety often points back to a desire for control.

Katie helps listeners think through "Is my anxiety beneficial or is it harmful?" by looking at three different things: Frequency, intensity, and length. Greg chimes in and says if you have anxiety before a job interview, that's normal, but if you’ve been in a new job for say 10 weeks and you still have lots of anxiety around that, your anxiety is a bigger issue and no longer beneficial. He also states that generally, we think of anxiety as something you experience in a certain season of life such as when you're a student or in college or a young adult. Rebekah adds that newness can often bring about anxiety.

Katie and Rebekah transition into talking about anxiety and stress as a new mom, and how it's easy to have an identify crisis as a new parent. In a similar vein, Brent and Matt speak into where they see anxiety show up in young adult men, especially when these men feel they're falling behind.

Rebekah then spends some time talking through unhealthy anxiety, and how it can grow when you don't seek help. She voices that anxiety can distort how you see yourself, others, and the world around you.

Greg brings the conversation back to what the Bible says about anxiety, so Brent references the anxiety of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane, and Matt references 2 Corinthians 12.

For more information on this podcast, visit podcast.fellowshipknox.org 

As host, Greg introduces Brent, Matt, Rebekah, and Katie.

Matt shares first and talks about how previous generations took the approach of keeping their anxiety internal, whereas in our current generation, anxiety and struggling with anxiety is more of an external conversation that could be heightened by things like the pandemic and social media.

Rebekah, Brent, and Katie join the conversation by thinking through how to walk children through their anxiety as they learn and grow and take in new information. Rebekah voices how important it is to really listen to your children as they walk through their feelings and emotions, and both Matt and Katie articulate that it's necessary to let your children have their emotions and feelings even though your instinct as a parent might be to shield them from that.

Brent moves into some of the science behind anxiety, and shares how God instilled a fight-or-flight in us as His creation. He gives the Biblical example of Mary and Martha to show how worry can lead to us missing things from the Lord. Brent also shares how sin causes us to have a disconnect from God and each other, and can spiral into other psychological issues. Katie says that anxiety often points back to a desire for control.

Katie helps listeners think through "Is my anxiety beneficial or is it harmful?" by looking at three different things: Frequency, intensity, and length. Greg chimes in and says if you have anxiety before a job interview, that's normal, but if you’ve been in a new job for say 10 weeks and you still have lots of anxiety around that, your anxiety is a bigger issue and no longer beneficial. He also states that generally, we think of anxiety as something you experience in a certain season of life such as when you're a student or in college or a young adult. Rebekah adds that newness can often bring about anxiety.

Katie and Rebekah transition into talking about anxiety and stress as a new mom, and how it's easy to have an identify crisis as a new parent. In a similar vein, Brent and Matt speak into where they see anxiety show up in young adult men, especially when these men feel they're falling behind.

Rebekah then spends some time talking through unhealthy anxiety, and how it can grow when you don't seek help. She voices that anxiety can distort how you see yourself, others, and the world around you.

Greg brings the conversation back to what the Bible says about anxiety, so Brent references the anxiety of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane, and Matt references 2 Corinthians 12.

For more information on this podcast, visit podcast.fellowshipknox.org