Happy Easter everyone! Christ has died, christ is risen, christ will come again...but it probably won't be this book that does it for him. This week we found ourselves on the weirdest side of easter when we read Planet Oster: Fertility Fusion by J.L. Logosz and Vera Valentine, a book about pastel space bunnies in space. Join us as we discuss glowing egg babies, how not to communicate in a relationship and some very surprising holes.

The book and our conversation contain sexually explicit content!

DM us and let us know your pros and cons of glowing egg fertilization or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro

We time-traveled! That's the totally reasonable and real explanation for our missing episode last week. I mean...this week because to us this week is last week and your last week is our next week, wait...no...that's not right. Anyway! We apologize for the gap. Traveling and sickness and Mac's judginess caused it.

This-ish week we read Claimings, Tails and Other Alien Artifacts by Lyn Gala.  A person who shares our affinity for overlong titles, but that's where the similarities end. This one is a doozy, boys. Join us as we discuss silent trading circles in excruciating detail, super tall turtle aliens where we test Dani's vet knowledge, and very unusual mating rituals.

The book and our conversation contain sexually explicit content!

DM us and let us know your Rownt mating strategy or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro

Post Script: The consistent tone in the background is a tiny pug named Pizza.

Daylight savings has arrived but we're not out of the cold just yet, so we thought we'd yeet(i) the winter season with an episode we recorded in the depths of it. Let's wave goodbye to Dani's crappy mic and to my (Mac's) sad dark sad's mood that rears it's little bitter head in this episode. Summer cometh, friends! We read Slippery When Yeti by Tana Stone, a book that plays the perfect cozy romance tune with weirdly specific details and kind of bland personalities. Join us as we discuss truffle salt (on eggs?), how to drive in the snow, and a lonely yeti with a weird sense of distance (emotional and geographical).

The book and our conversation contain sexually explicit content!

DM us to let us know what kind of monster you'd be turned into or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro

Post Script: I will not apologize for my terrible yeti/yeeti pun.

Friends! We did it! We're finally talking about a book that all three of us fell head over butts for. This week we read The Maleficent Faerie by Rebecca F. Kenney. A retelling of Sleeping Beauty which, by our memories, is a story about some fairies making a cake and also a young girl being kissed awake by a strange man? Classic stuff! The version that Kenney has graced us with left us all a little bit in awe. You should actually read it.

Join us as we discuss all of the times this book hit us right in the emotional gut, what side of the field things come out of, and some of the best written sex scenes we've ever read. Seriously, for the love of all that is holey (swiss cheese, donuts, that tshirt i've had since 7th grade, etc.) GO AND READ THIS BOOK!

The book and our conversation contain sexually explicit content!

DM us to let us know what part of the book made you cry or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro

One of the things that I appreciate most about romance novels, is their ability to leave no stone unturned when it comes to turning all of our childhood stories into outrageous smut. This week we read Three Wicked Bears by Cassia Briar, a Goldilocks retelling that gets real dark (though not in an incestuous way, thank satan.) Join us as we discuss the classic reverse harem tropes including: "clothes trying on montage", "dance club with secret sex room" and "all the men have one single personality trait." Also what the heck is an alpha male in romance, and why do we (shamefully for some) lust after them?

This book in particular includes some pretty intense triggers, we read them at the beginning of the episode, but please know that sexual and physical abuse are among them. It kind of goes without saying now, but this book and this podcast contain sexually explicit material.

DM us to let us know what kind of shifter you'd be or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:

Intro/Outro

Hello friends! This week we read She Came From the Swamp by Darva Green, a sapphic swamp monster romance. A Slavic swamp monster romance to be exact. A sapphic, Slavic swamp monster romance.  A book with so much potential and also so much Taylor Swift. Join us as we discuss ways to describe breasts, what exactly the best offering is for a hundreds year old swamp spirit, and labia and all of their wonderful diversity!

The book and our conversation contain sexually explicit content!

DM us to let us know if you did your homework or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro

Okay, hear me out, what if, as a country, we all agree that Valentine's day is only for kids? Like let's let this day die after the glory years when you got to make your own mailboxes and give away tiny cards and terrible candy. Where crushes were had and hearts were crushed. Not convinced? I can guarantee that this book will make you never have any romantic feelings around this time of year ever again. We read Come to Cupid by G. Eilsel where a cupid named...Q abducts and convinces a woman that they are totally in love (or whatever) with just the power of his 10 inch d*ck. Join us as we discuss boning in the sky, the ideal temperature of cum, and how the hell pagers worked.

The book and our conversation contain sexually explicit content!

DM us to tell us about what you know about beepers or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro

Hey, friends! We've missed you! We are back with an episode full of all kinds of surprises. This week we read The Loch Ness Monster by Siggy Shade. Join us as we talk about dino/dino adjacent tongue play, "mammary intercourse", and (I am not joking) literal cum fountains. And of course we ask the age old question "can freshwater trout be eaten as sashimi?"

The book and our conversation contain sexually explicit content!

DM us to tell us about your raw fish expertise or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro

Friends, this week's book was a doozie. We read Kidnapped By The Krampus by Emily Shore and we have some FEELINGS about it.  Join us as we discuss this fever dream of a book as well as how not to write BDSM, the importance of writing consent even in ridiculous fiction, and some incredibly confusing holiday themed analogies.

The book and our conversation contain explicit sexual content! This book also contains scenes with nonconsensual sexual interaction, and we discuss that in the episode as well.

Follow us on Instagram or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro

Valentine's day, smalentine's day. Thanksgiving is the new holiday of love and romance. This week we read two books, Back for Seconds by J.L. Logosz and Vera Valentine and Full Sack by Layla Fae, and nothing could have prepared us for what we found. Let's just say, we'll all be looking at our Thanksgiving tables a little differently this year.

Happy Thanksgiving, Friends!

The book and our conversation contain explicit sexual content!

Add us to your guest list on Instagram or email us at [email protected] with questions, comments, or suggestions for our next read!

Music Credits:
Intro/Outro