Divorce is not desirable. It is definitely not what we want for your marriage, but the reality is that divorce is an option. When pretending that divorce is not an option it prevents us from dealing with the issues that lead to divorce. We can’t prevent divorce by saying it’s not an option. We can only prevent divorce by dealing with the issues that lead to divorce.

A thriving marriage is not something you arrive at but rather a journey you’re on. This episode discusses some of the signs you will see when a marriage is thriving.

Becoming parents is not the purpose of marriage. Parenting, however, can lead to conflicts in marriage when you, as a couple, don’t agree on how to handle things. It’s important to manage the Unexpectations around parenting. If you don’t it will keep your marriage from thriving.

Does your spouse complete you? Is that the biblical vision for marriage?

Well, the answer is no. The one who completes us is God not our spouse. A thriving marriage is not a couple completing each other. A thriving marriage is two people complete in Christ growing in holiness together. Your marriage will thrive when you look to God to complete you and your spouse to be your partner in growing to be more fit for the kingdom of God.

According to an article in the Washington Post by Terrence Real there is a normal amount of marital hatred. https://www.washingtonpost.com/wellness/2022/09/23/marriage-relationships-conflict/

Is that true? Is there a normal amount of hatred in marriage? Well, Jesus calls us to love our enemies. If that’s true then even more so then we should love our spouses. Hate does not have a place in Christianity at all much less, in marriage. Yet, in marriage we will not always be happy. There will be times when we aren’t happy in marriage but that should not lead us to hate our spouses.

Marriage exists to help to people become more fit to fulfill the purpose that God has for them. One of the ways we do that is by supporting each other. To be effective at this we need to match the right support to the need. Support can be emotional, tangible, or informational. Each one is necessary at different times to make a marriage thrive.

You can find the article Jen references in this episode at: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/shared-existence/202209/how-common-misunderstanding-leads-so-many-couples-conflict

Marriages go through natural phases of development. In this episode, Bryon and Jen apply Bruce Tuckman’s theory of group development to our marriages and use his observations to help us navigate the storms we all face in marriage.

Holidays can be very stressful for a marriage. The Unexpectations (unmet expectations that are unvoiced, unshared, or unreasonable) that crop up during the holidays can create significant conflicts in a marriage. In this episode, Bryon and Jen talk about navigating the conflicts that often occur during the stressful holiday season.

In this episode Bryon and Jen discuss the theology of gender and what the Bible says about gender roles in marriage.

What do you do if you find someone other than your spouse attractive? Is it okay to find someone other than your spouse attractive?

There are attractive people out there. Seeing attractive people is unavoidable. You can control what you think about and how you look at attractive people.

Three things can help you deal with feelings of attraction:

• Choose to love your spouse.