Paleo Bites

(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/fish98/art/Antipodes-Quinkana-Concept-969634441)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Quinkana, a galloping terrestrial crocodile from Australia, because why wouldn’t this be a thing? Especially on that continent, AKA Death World. From the Late Miocene to the Late Pleistocene, this 13-foot mekosuchine was also encountered by early humans, rather than being alongside the dinosaurs like it should have been. Why were you from then rather than from then? That’s a good sentence.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://theconversation.com/history-mystery-solved-the-origins-of-the-falkland-islands-wolf-12637)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Dusicyon, a wolf that encountered humans on its isolated island home and then got promptly killed off by the colonists… yeah, this is a sad episode. We try our best to lighten it up, but there’s only so much you can do! From the Early Holocene, this 5-foot canid as a genus lived all throughout South America, and the one we’re talking about for most of this episode is specifically the Falkland Islands version, Dusicyon australis, also called the Warrah. That’s neat. You know what’s not neat? This episode. Seriously, this was a mistake, y’all should listen to something else.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

Also special thanks to Catherine Ruža for her contributions to today's episode.

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(image source: https://www.sci.news/paleontology/gremlin-slobodorum-12547.html)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Gremlin, a monstrous little critter with a big head and a mischievous demeanor, particularly if you feed it after midnight. Come on, we all knew that’s where these jokes were heading, huh? We’re all on the same page? Good. From the Late Cretaceous, this 6-foot leptoceratopsid lived in both the wet scrublands of Alberta as well as in the insides or on the wings of planes back in the 40s and 50s… that one might be a deeper cut. Just watch the Twilight Zone episode, you’ve seen it. Or at least one of its many, many parodies.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://a-z-animals.com/animals/eryops/)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Eryops, a large amphibian with curved teeth, oval bumps, and a big head. Hey, Eryops, why the drawn-out face? Thank you, I’m here ‘til Tuesday. From the Early Permian, this 8-foot temnospondyl had the species name megacephalus, meaning this creature’s binomial name means “drawn-out face with a big head.” I really think they want us to know how big this thing’s head is, guys. What a thing to be famous for! Some can sing, some can dance, some have really, really big heads. We all work with our lot in life, whether it’s a lot or not.

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(image source: https://fossil.fandom.com/wiki/Kaprosuchus)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Spencer Mayhew discuss Kaprosuchus, a running crocodilian from Cretaceous Africa that lived alongside the far bigger crocodilian Sarcosuchus, the croc-like dinosaur Suchomimus, and the croc-jawed sail-backed dinosaur Spinosaurus. It’s like a who’s who of croc mimics, one of whom’s name literally means “crocodile mimic.” I guess it was trendy there. From the Mid Cretaceous, this 16-foot notosuchian was either semi-aquatic or fully terrestrial; paleontologists aren’t quite sure. Why are they not sure? What are we paying them to dig for? I tell you, I want my tax money spent more efficiently! Paleontologists are paid by the government, yes?

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald.

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(image source: https://pixels.com/featured/camelops-hesternus-front-view-corey-ford.html)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Camelops, a… well, it’s a camel, guys. Yeah, news flash, Camelops is a camel. God, we really need another dinosaur episode soon. From the Late Pleistocene, this 7-foot camel lived in North America and lived alongside elephants, lions, bison, and wolves. A whole lot of creatures you wouldn’t expect to find on this continent, yet here they were. And here was Camelops. Please still listen to this show, folks. We have so much left to talk about, I promise.

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(image source: https://eartharchives.org/articles/saber-toothed-salmon-teeth-more-like-tusks-than-fangs/)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Oncorhynchus rastrosus, AKA the saber-toothed salmon, AKA the coolest name for a fish ever, but FYI it’s not actually a valid descriptor anymore, so AKA it’s a massive disappointment. A big flop. Like a fish. Flop, flop. From the Late Miocene, this 8-foot salmonid was still pretty impressive, being such a big fish that also had big outward fangs, even if they weren’t saber-like canines. I just feel though that if you’re name is highlighting a certain feature, you better have it as advertised, otherwise I want my money back. You hear that, Oncorhynchus rastrosus? I want my money back! And don’t get it from a loan shark, I swear to God.

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(image source: Max Bellomio, @digital_duck on Twitter)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Macrauchenia, a big hoofed mammal that either had a trunk or didn’t, kind of like me when I travel or go to the pool. Either trunks or no trunks. It depends on how lazy I’m feeling. From the Pleistocene epoch, this 10-foot-tall litoptern ungulate was part of a group of mammals unique to South America that died out due to the Great American Interchange and the changing climate. Which means this one’s extinction had nothing to do with humans, so we can cross that one off the list at least. Guilt-free! Yay! Ugh…

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. Also, AI voices are used in the intro in all of this month's episodes.

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(image source: https://www.sci.news/paleontology/south-african-inostrancevia-11935.html)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Inostrancevia, potentially the largest of the gorgonopsids, which are a super-awesome group of creatures you should be ashamed you haven’t heard of before. Have you not heard of them before? Shame, shame! From the Late Permian, this 14-foot therapsid was the size of a bear, had saber-teeth, potentially fur, and lived millions of years before the first dinosaur ever took a dump upon the Earth, which is all quite remarkable. Can you tell how much I like these guys? I’m not biased, they’re just objectively awesome, and if you don’t like them, you’re wrong.

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. Also, AI voices are used in the intro in all of this month's episodes.

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(image source: https://www.artstation.com/artwork/zDoGPq)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Carcharodontosaurus, a big super-predator that competed with a croc-jawed dino with a sail and a croc-jawed dino without. Oh, and also a big croc. Good ol’ carchar stood out by not following the croc trend! What a rebel. From the Mid Cretaceous, this 40-foot theropod was one of those unlucky dinosaurs that got blown up twice, once by whatever extinction did it in back in its day and once by a bunch of planes in a WW2 bombing run that took out its museum. Poor guy. The world doesn’t treat outliers fairly, I swear. Rebels are cool, guys! C’mon!

Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. Also, AI voices are used in the intro in all of this month's episodes.

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