I think every one of us has heard some version where you could "have it all." You could have the popularity, the guy/girl, the wealth, the status. You can do it all - be a kick-ass parent while juggling a full time job and cultivating your hobbies. But can we really "have it all"? Or is it just an illusion built to be a fantasy? Having it all can mean a lot of different things, but a lot of the time this idealization brings about a lot of anxiety and pressure for our futures. "What if I fuck up my career progression by going down this risky path? What if the partner I'm building my life with turns out to be the wrong one? I feel like I need to live in an amazing city, with amazing people, with an amazing job, right now. I need to have it all - or else I feel like I've messed up my life." But in reality, life is about sacrifice. There simply is no "having it all" because our wants and priorities also change with us, and we are human beings. We are supposed to mess up. Let's dive deep this week into how "having it all" has influenced our society.

These days, with the talk of nepotism and the "it's who you know, not what you know" mindset, the question of whether anything is a meritocracy comes to the forefront. For me, it's especially shedding more light as "traditionally meritocracy" fields (such as medicine) are exposed as being nothing more than a networking game. As I work through my naiveté in this episode, I wonder how we can move forward in a system that prizes connections - is there a way forward? Is it even possible to implement a true meritocracy system? Is a meritocracy system even the right way to go?

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How do you live your life in a way that nothing matters, yet everything matters at the same time? To celebrate Everything Everywhere All at Once sweeping the Oscars this past weekend, I wanted to dedicate this week's episode to all the people wondering how their lives will pan out, if they're making the right decisions, if they're going to be happy. This movie taught me some very important lessons in my life, ones that emphasize how insignificant (relieving) and significant (meaningful) our lives are. This one is also dedicated to the Asian Americans and other POCs out there, who have struggled seeing such media diversity representation. This one's for us!

Everyone has either fantasized about living in Manhattan or know someone that has. I was one of those people that fantasized. To me, living in a big city was everything. I thought it would give me the identity I needed, the life I needed. But after moving here, I realize that it's not all about that. Don't get me wrong, living here has been an experience I wouldn't trade for the world. But there is more than what meets the eye, especially as New York is romanticized on social media. Let's see what this small town girl in me learns about living in the big apple.