In this conversation, Dr. Nashay Lowe explores the concept of conflict as a patterned experience that often feels repetitive and familiar. She introduces the idea of 'pausing the pattern' as a transformative practice that allows individuals to interrupt automatic responses and regain choice in conflict situations. By understanding the multi-level nature of patterns and the discomfort of pausing, listeners are encouraged to reflect on their own conflict dynamics and consider new possibilities for resolution.

Key Takeaways

• Conflict feels repetitive and predictable.
• Patterns in conflict are often reenacted unconsciously.
• The pause is about restoring choice, not just calming down.
• Patterns operate at multiple levels: internal, relational, and systemic.
• Awareness alone doesn't create transformation; interruption is necessary.
• Pausing can feel uncomfortable but is essential for insight.
• Rushing often keeps patterns intact; slowing down is key.
• The pause creates space for meaningful dialogue and intentional change.
• Once you learn to pause, you notice patterns earlier.
• Clarity in conflict comes from pausing, not urgency.

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