In this session of Untangling the Mind, we explore the patterns of people-pleasing and ask how we can remain kind without disappearing in the process. Drawing on early Buddhist teachings around craving, clinging, and wise intention, we look at how the desire for approval, fear of conflict, and the impulse to control others' discomfort can quietly pull us away from ourselves. Together, we examine the difference between genuine compassion and what's been called "idiot compassion" — giving people what they want rather than what they need to avoid witnessing suffering — and consider how identities like "the reliable one" or "the easy one" can become subtle forms of suffering.

Prompt: Which is your default? Nice (people pleaser, must be liked, socially acceptable behavior) or Kind (Aligned with self first, empathetic, genuine)?

Talk segment that complements the sit portion on People Pleasing

Group Date: 5/12/2026