Late as usual, still on mobile, still dead tired but we will structure our souls

Bit of a philosophical episode and understanding why unimportance terrifies me and the same time thing less important than my already unimportant life fill with fear

I am devastated, the one time I was excited to splurge on myself as adult with actual earning,my recklessness and impatience got me cheated big time. I am get a fade this evening as a last reckless behavior. I want swear and wish evil on them but it won't happen, but I did have a realization on why I am anxious about failing but I am still incredibly reckless

Worse audio quality than the more recent (they've all been bad) but it's not inaudible though

This took forever to upload, lol .. I will be more responsible and follow through with my plans

So I started this episode almost derailing into my usual sad girl vibes but I was able to catch my self and talk about my style evolution my current style but sad girl kept on popping up here and there.

So basically... I am going back to structured work and I have a week's notice before forced close proximity with another human, Dayo can do this. Planning to bolder and prepare more emotionless arguments so I don't get frustrated and upset with stubborn humans. So many things I wanted to talk about but couldn't cause brain was fried.

Do this quarter is about to end, some failures, some shame, new plans for onwards starting with last full week of the quarter. It ends hopeful.

The title says it all still dealing with an irresponsible promise I made three weeks ago

I should buy raincoats, another set of life restructuring plans, to back track and plan to work properly and a goal