In any relationship, the strongest glue that brings union between people are the three A’s: to be accepted for who we are, to be appreciated for who we are, and to be acknowledged for who we are.

We think of the present as just one frame in life’s film, to be immediately replaced by the next frame from the digital stream. Don’t give all these frames equal validity. Past and future frames only exist as ideas of how the world has been and will be.

When we describe our great relationship, it’s not to say, “Whatever you are struggling with, we don’t have that problem, nor is it just to wave it in your face!” We share our experiences so that you’ll know it’s possible to have such a relationship and it really does exist.

Most of us have found ways to deal with change, but we don’t greet it with open arms. How can you embrace it, especially in your day to day relating? There’s a way of flowing around things that leads to a natural balance where you can both be comfortable.

Think what you would like in a relationship. Imagine being supported without being controlled. Imagine that support being freely given without obligation. Imagine making your own choices without having to explain yourself. Imagine being able to feel vulnerable and weak and have that be accepted.

Open your minds and your hearts to another way. We are living proof that it is possible to love without hardship and difficulty. You do not always have to struggle and work in order for your relationship to be full of calm, peace and joy.

White lies are the opposite of the directness needed for people to feel seen and understood. When you tell the full truth there is never a build-up of resentment from not sharing what you really feel.

We write about successful relationships from our own experience and from our talks and interviews with other happy couples. At the same time we feel the practices that we share can be applied to all relationships and that this is a path toward spreading peace in the world.

Optimism is an essential part of a happy life and a happy relationship. When I was younger I trashed several good relationships by repeatedly being dissatisfied, leaving, feeling alone to the point of physical pain, getting back together and then repeating the cycle.

Often when people think about the issue of acceptance, they think it is about compromise. It assumes that there are different sides, and that one must settle in order to avoid conflict. But there is a way to reach agreement without compromise.