Chemohawk Sessions

Pick 48: Slick Flick Pick: The Myth of Sithyphus--Kith to the Sith, Kin to their Sin (Padme Takes the Long Way); (Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace, 1999) *With Red Devil's Aural Appearance*


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Greetings, Cinematic Fanatics!

Allow us the futuristic, yet told a long, long, long godd*** time ago in a galaxy not adjacent, not within a day's space flight but sithfuc**** light years away intergalactic planetary travailing, cosmos gazing, a dark-sided sinister cadre neither disrupting nor phasing pleasure of warp speed beaming you through any available rifts, tears or crevasses in the known/semi-known galaxy or the great

unknown as we meander around on fool's errands and farcical, faux negotiations dispatching
mindless drones with ease but meeting our match with the superior droidekas,
one Scottish saber baby, sky, innocent blue; the other a lean, mean Irish green
sabering machine, as they navigate this gorgeous late 90's styled digital world
we are shown a new iconic, nightmare inducing, changing the face of horror and
marketing a new Halloween mask for decades to come, a taciturn, cloaked in
black, wielding a duel red saber that will stab, slash, cauterize and burn and
who cuts no Jedi an inch of slack Darth Satanfuc**** Maul, a ridiculous
adolescent toy grab personified so stupidly and sloppily in the illiterate,
slobbering buffoon known as Jar Jar, while the shizzy Yin of Jar Jar is
redeemed by the momentously wicked antagonist Yang of the horn-headed, red-eyed
psychopath well on his path to the darkest side, we invite you to explore the
origin of this far away world with us as we tackle the technically a prequel,
but more so a chronologically initial offering treat of Slick Flick Pick, an entertaining, slick/flick-explaining series, a desirable diversion from the main interplanetary vein of Chemohawk Sessions.

You're our Cinematic Fanatics; we, your worthwhile f****** cinephiles.

For your 48th episode, Red Light Saber Devil and I review one of our most rewatched,

enjoyed and guilty pleasured entries in the Star Wars franchise: an adrenaline fueled, mysterious and insidious politically motivated display of corruption both within the Senate and on the streets among the hoi polloi, where a toydarian is a busted tooth slave owner, gambling, prostitution
and podracing are considered healthy hobbies, Jedis and their cabal walk for
miles in the thick mounds of sand yet take not one known shower, where double
decoy doppelgangers are used for security as much as for purposes of trickery.

We offer you, regarding this bright, vibrant and brilliantly well-suited for individual, couple, young, old and family matters alike sci-fi production Star Wars: Episode I-The Phantom Menace, circa May 1999.

Enter, with us, you cinematic fanatics, into the realm of film's fantasy while we unwind the grind of

reality…

We offer you:  Pick 48: Slick Flick Pick: The Myth of Sithyphus--Kith to the Sith, Kin to their Sin (Padme Takes the Long Way); (Star Wars: Episode I–The Phantom Menace, 1999. Today, we discuss--the one-sided sense in the Anakin and Thin Padme affair, for I understand, much like the

older sun-soaked lifeguard at the pool I fancied when I was a young child, why
Anakin wants to hug her, but why in Naboo's a-hole does she fancy that
mop-haired twerp, the Scotch-Irish chemistry between Liam and Ewan, the
numerous ways in which Darth Maul was an astonishing and undefinably haunting
mauling evil force making Darth Vader look like a geriatric, clumsy and
cumbersome deep breathing little bi***, how if you are going to swindle the
winnings of a pod race, do try harder to secure your immaculately impregnated
mother's freedom and how swell it would have been to see Mace bust out his
purple saber blade, hold it to the throat of the recalcitrant, insolent Qui-Gon
and say NO MOTHERFUC***, we will not allow this bastard child into our holy,
highfalutin organization, now walk away before I mace your Irish a** into--fine
as Tatooine sand-- dust.

- Your worthwhile cinephile: Falsetto Prophet and Red Sabered Devil

P.S. (Procrastinated Statement) *Intro/outro song, Soulicious, courtesy of the artist, Dyalla.

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Chemohawk SessionsBy Falsetto Prophet