The gang tackles the first "Short Attention Span Theater" episode of 2026 by trying to understand Three Kings Day, defending disc golf as "real golf," and offering unsolicited advice on growing a beard (and dealing with psoriasis). A visit from "Pittsburgh Bob" sparks a debate on regional sandwiches, while the conversation meanders through international politics, Olympic preferences, and the most aerodynamic head shapes for imaginary winter swimming events. It's a masterclass in conversational chaos.