Pleasure gets framed as a reward you earn after you’ve 'fixed' everything and everyone. I’m calling time on that. When women are conditioned to overfunction, carry the emotional labour, and stay permanently available, burnout is not a personal failing, it’s the expected outcome. So let’s talk about joy, fun and pleasure as a daily practice, and as a quiet refusal to participate in the dynamics that keep us small. 

I share why guilt, especially mum guilt, so often serves patriarchy and not your family, and what happens when you stop “standing to attention” every time someone is disappointed or upset. We dig into the messy middle of change: being judged as selfish, learning boundaries that protect your nervous system, and why trying to control how you’re perceived can turn your whole life into a performance. I also tell a real story from my own week, where my inner critic screamed “self sabotage”, and how I used a candle, journalling and kindness to reset and find the next right step. 

We then zoom out into relationships, community and intimacy: how to build a real village through reciprocity, why friendships matter, and what receptivity actually looks like when you let yourself receive without keeping score. This includes sex and pleasure, but the bigger point is life force: coming home to your body, trusting your intuition, and remembering you can hold anger and still laugh, you can want more and still seize the day. 

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More from me or to work with me go to KirstyDee.com

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