We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors with an impromptu discussion about whether beauty is objective or merely in the eye of the beholder, and then sit at the feet of Microsoft's new AI chatbot, Tay, and seek to learn from her wisdom and sensitivity. We delve into the Twitter feud between Trump and Cruz and segue into the complete clown show that is the 2016 Republican Party. The remainder of our time is spent discussing Holy Week (hint: the math is all wrong), touching upon such topics as whether history written by believers can be trusted and whether the story of Jesus is too NC-17 for those little children that Christ said heaven will be filled with. In our "Dick Move, God" segment we are introduced to a man whose honeymoon didn't go as expected, and Christian is biebered by the clothes he buys at wholesale warehouses while Jason's bieber has to do with how inconvenienced he is by things that are actually really, really convenient.

Also, at final count we believe it was three distinct episodes of The Twilight Zone that Jason conflated into one.