In this meta episode, the Bumperpodcast team makes a shocking discovery: they’ve been recording episodes for months, but none of them have been published! Join Natty Bumpercar, Aloysious J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, and Producer as they try to figure out what went wrong.

Natty Bumpercar: So the exciting thing to me was when I found out that I, oh, we were, oh, yeah, this is wonderful. We're recording. We're recording. Yeah. Yeah. It's fine. It's working. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Craziest thing, bumper pod casketeers. We just found out we've been recording episodes for months now and just, I don't know, sending them into space, nothing, nothing, there's been no episodes, but we didn't realize that because no one, no one told us we've been making these episodes and then we've been uploading these episodes and then, and then, and then there's no, there's no episodes.

Producer: And I, um, I mean, I, I did notice in my, uh, feed, uh, that we would not, that I was, that I was not seeing new bumper podcast episodes coming in and, uh, but I, I was, uh, I was, I was just, I was kind of okay with it. So I didn't mention, I didn't say anything, but I figured, I just figured you guys all knew it.

Natty Bumpercar: But, uh, well, why would you think you were here when we were recording things? So you knew that we were trying to make new episodes, that we weren't making new episodes, but they weren't going anywhere. Why would you, did you not think like, all right, so you're, you see on you, you look on your podcast thing and you see that there's no new episodes coming in, but you know that we've been in the studio making episodes. So I don't understand why you wouldn't go like, huh, that's strange. Why am I not seeing these new episodes that we're recording?

Producer: I'm just intrigued because I, I didn't know, are we on some sort of podcast platform? Is there some place I should be subscribing or, or something like that? This is news to me.

Natty Bumpercar: How can this be news to you? It's like a thousand episodes that we've been doing for a thousand years, one episode per year. And, uh, what did, did you think we were just recording and, and what did you, where did you, did you assume that these episodes were, were, were going?

Producer: I, you know, I guess I never put a ton of thought into it. I just kind of thought it was a bunch of, you know, pals hanging out at headquarters here in Coffee Can Alley and we're all, you know, jibber jabbering and making, talking funny stuff.

Natty Bumpercar: And honestly, I'm, so the stuff that we've been recording, quote unquote recording, people, we send it out to people and it goes onto their devices and I feel like we have a lot of apologies to be doing. I'm flabbergasted just like you, Aloysius. I, uh, producer, I, what did you, so you just thought we were all sitting around with microphones and, and headphones on and, and recording and that we've, we've been, I don't understand. You thought this was just a bunch of pals hanging out with all the shenanigans and all the ridiculousness? You're the producer. You're the one who's supposed to put the episodes up on the, the, the place, the clouds, the, wherever the episodes go. And you didn't even know we were actually making a podcast?

Rufus T. Rufus: Now, now let me jump in here for just a second. It's uh, hello everybody. It's me Rufus, T. Rufus. Uh, now I, now I didn't notice nothing about no episodes cause I don't understand how none of that work. But what I did notice was that the, the, the automatic, uh, deposit, auto deposit into my account had stopped. And what that meant was, you know, normally every time we record an episode, I think I get 70, uh, three, 75, 77 cents, 77 cents per episode, uh, which, you know, is adding up. People say, well, you only 77 cents. That's not a lot of money. And I say, you know, Rufus, you're a lawyer. You can do even better. And I say, now, hold on a second. You realize that when you take that 77 cents and you stop multiplying it by all of the episodes that we have recorded that I've not even that I've even been on, I get paid for episodes. I'm not even on some, I got almost, almost, I almost have . Okay. People say, Hey, you, what are you going to make money doing this podcast? And I say, now, hold on a second. I made 77 times 470, whatever it is. Now I can't particularly multiply sevens. Seven is times eight. That's that's a mystery. No one's ever going to solve. I know seven times seven is going to be 49. That was easy. Seven times nine is going to be 63. So seven times eight is somewhere in between somewhere in the middle of 49 and whatever I just said. And so I don't expect me to be on the nose with the calculations, but if 470 something times 77, that's how much money that I've, I've, I've, I've had in the bank currently, but then it all stopped. I looked at my bank every single day and I even, I would call Cheryl done at the bank and I'd say, not not Cheryl. This is Rufus T and she stopped me and she'd say, don't even finish it. I know exactly who you are and I know exactly why you're calling. And I would say, Oh, Cheryl, don't be like that. You know? And cause I used to go down to the bank and I would, uh, you know, chit and chat with everybody, but the world's so fast these days and I don't have time to go to the bank and you know, uh, and say, Hey Cheryl, um, how, how was everything at home? You know, talk to people. Hey, I don't know anybody else's name. I just know Cheryl cause she has a little plate in front of her. So I can see, you know, it's like association. I walk in, I see the name tag plate right there, Cheryl. And then I look at her and I see your face. Now one time it was somebody else who was in Cheryl's booth in her seat, which I found out isn't actually even her booth or her seat. Now the way I thought it was like, uh, a barbershop where, you know, it's like, this is my chair. Nobody's going to touch my clippers. No, you know, but, uh, share it now at the bank, just like at the grocery store. I thought that was your aisle, you know, and nobody touches my eyes. This is Cheryl's seat, Cheryl's booth. And this is where, you know, but I walked in one day, said, Cheryl, same spot. It was some, some gentlemen wearing a three piece suit at the bank. And I'll tell you what, I looked him up and I looked him down and I said, ain't no way. I got to give my money to, you know, to this person. I don't even know who it is. Certainly not Cheryl. I'll tell you what, almost, almost took all my money out of the bank, but they said, no, you know, in order to withdraw all your money, you have to hit a minimum. And I guess I 50, I haven't hit the minimum to be able to take the money out. So, uh, you know, I'm stuck with them and they're stuck with me, but, uh, I'm just glad that Cheryl, she was on vacation or some lunch or I don't, you know, I don't really know where she was. I never found out. I forgot to ask her when the next time I went in, huh? Anyway, what were we talking about?

Natty Bumpercar: I have no idea. I, I don't, I really, after all that, whatever he was talking about, I have, I don't remember anything that came before that. That was like before Rufus was talking. So B R W T B R W T before Rufus was talking. I got to get a, I got to get a thing on this mic. It makes it pop before Rufus was talking and then AR WT. Yeah. Before Rufus was talking and after Rufus was talking. And, uh, in between the Twix, the two can have a beat. Um, I did, you were saying 77 cents. It's not bad. Well, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta work on my contract. I gotta get, I gotta get more cash. Okay. So no. Uh, also Rufus, I think that that 77, you don't, there's no 77 cents per episode. That's ridiculous. Um, I think that that 77 cents that you're seeing every so often when you go to the bank is some sort of like interest, which I don't really know how that works either. Uh, so there's, there's money. And then every so often it multiplies, which I don't know how money does that. I don't know why, why money would do that. It seems like a great thing for money to do. I would have to have any to see this magical experience, but yeah. Uh, also I did get a call from the bank. Um, they are, they, you can't go back in Cheryl. You, you just, you know, she just doesn't want to talk to you. And you know, like during the pandemic, a lot of people were like, Oh, I don't have to go out. I can do, you know, if I do go out, I'm gonna do self checkout. I'm going to do a, you know, whatever, order food online. It gets dropped off at my house.

Producer: I'm going to, you know, just don't want to hang around with people. This, you know, I'm, I'm nervous talking to people. And, uh, a lot of, you know, the employees, they're like, Oh, so it's better to have people in so we can actually, you know, interact with them. And, uh, you ruin that for Cheryl. So she, she's like, no more, no more coming in. I don't want to hear about hats. Evidently you talk about hats a lot. Um, yeah. So just if, if you want, if you have questions for the bank, you can just give them to me and I can, I can take them in, but, but more importantly, and I do remember pig, we were talking about, uh, producer, not knowing that this was an actual podcast 15 years in or something, hundreds of episodes that he's the producer of, and, uh, I, I'm, I'm still flummoxed by that. I don't understand the flummoxed part. You know, I thought we all were making believe, you know, like we're doing, we're doing improv, we're doing yes. And it's like, okay, we're doing a long form Harold improv of, uh, okay. You're in a headquarters. Okay. And you're a group of people with a frog and a pig and a man and a lawyer person and other random people. Okay. Yes. And, and you're making a podcast, you know, and, and that's what I kind of thought that that's what we were doing. I thought it was all ephemeral. It's the kind of art that you make and it just automatically disappears into the universe. And I, uh, now it's finding out kind of that that is not exactly what we were, we were doing that even a little bit.

Natty Bumpercar: No, no, that's not what we were doing. I mean, it is an improvised podcast. That's why we remember we, we went to, uh, we went to Florida and we spoke at a conference and then we died essentially. That was in June. No, now is June. That was in January that we went to Florida, spoke at a conference. We were like, this is a high point. This is great. Look at the bumper podcast. We're really doing great things. And then immediately to be struck down with the flu and then pneumonia and then the hospital and then shingles. It, I've been broken so that's why I haven't been on top of, uh, all these episodes that have ever been evidently been recorded and now I don't even know where they are. So that's the mystery that I have to solve now. Where are the last several months of episodes that have not been going into the feed? I am thrilled that things could go so smoothly and now that I get to figure this out.

Rufus T. Rufus: You know what else you should figure out is how to hire a new producer. Cause this guy ain't got it.

Announcer/Network Voice: The bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp with Natty bumper car and some of his pals. It is family friendly, clean, and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you love our show and you'd like to help support the podcast, check out our Patreon page at https://www.patreon.com forward slash Natty bumper car. Also pretty please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, share it with everyone everywhere, post about it on all of the social medias or leave a rating and review. The bumper podcast is produced at headquarters in coffee can alley. It's recorded, mixed and produced by producer. The bumper podcast features contributions from Aloysius J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, doodle poodle, robot trunks, and a gaggle of other silly rascals. Our head talker is probably Natty bumper car. We also have an absurd newsletter. Check it out and subscribe at Natty bumper car.com slash subscribe. Also, you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter at Natty bumper car. Hugs and hearts. See you soon.

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