Point Of Growth

We thought as the New Year 2021 is upon us maybe it would be a good thing to start in on a different note promoting the art of emotional intelligence. I sat down with my friend Andrew Tsuro where we spoke on a couple of things.

Andrew shared with us what it is to be intelligent emotionally as well as highlighting some of the things that help him to stand out as a cooperate trainer and speaker.

When leaders build leaders the world becomes a better place.

I had the privilege of sitting down with Irene Fitzi who is the found of Building A Future and organisation based in Barkley West here in the Northern Cape right outside Kimberley where people are not so privileged but she managed to challenge the status quo at a very early age as a young woman and stood for what she believed.

She is an excellent example of servant leadership and we discuss a lot more on how she gets into the places she enter. There is a lot more that can be achieved if we believe and help those who look up to us.

We should want a partner that makes us feel good more than one that makes us look good. What we feel inside can never be replaced by how we look.

We are not born Narcissists but we become that through how we are brought up. Its a trait that develops as we grow. It is mostly caused by what happened to us.

Here are just a few of the characteristics we can use to identify symptoms :

Desires Constant support

Always feels horribly wounded when criticised

Hates negative feedback

Lacks empathy

Great sense of self importance

Believes that they special and can be understood by special people too

Always thinking of being in power

Takes advantage of others to get their own way

We all have times we question ourselves as to whether we are really living to the fullest of our potential or not.

Many times people jump into things they are not called for all because of peer pressure. The people we live with and the people we work with many at times non physically push us into doing things we do not really wanna do all because it is not in line with who we are or what we stand for.

It is now time that we stop allowing voices of others to dictate who we are meant to be.

Our lives as we know them have changed, courtesy of the new normal which allows people to be who they truly are but just in different ways.

Have you found where you fit in, How effective is your skillset in such a time, and are you staying relevant?

Not every hand that helps you is really helping you because sometimes your growth is restricted due to the help you get.

Do it yourself, fail, and keep trying again.

Making a difference can be derived from doing what we can with what we have with the aim of wanting to change the lives of others but our definitions of success can not be determined for us by society.

We as individuals define what is success to us based on what we want to achieve and where we hope to be tomorrow. Using your passion as a pathway to get to success is the best and cheapest form.

Identify the passion and make use of it until you attain success.

From time to time we do things that we love overtime that we do not changes yet it makes us feel whole.

We all have things that we do so well but professionalizing them is what will make people find us useful or find what we do valuable enough to pay money for.

What is your Uniqueness in value?

Have you ever wondered how can one fully unleash their potential?

Have you managed to identify what your passion is?

A lot of people spend money on things they call hobbies while others get paid for doing what they love. Passion is what drives you to do something time and again even when you are not being paid for it or even when it's costing you.

The best way to capture moments is to pay attention . This is how we cultivate mindfulness.

Mindfulness involves paying attention to each event experienced in the present moment within our body and mind, with a non-judgmental, non-reactive and accepting attitude. In learning to be mindful, we can begin to counter many of our everyday challenges such as stress, anxiety and depression because we are learning to experience events in a more impersonal and

detached way.Mindfulness is a way of paying attention to, and seeing clearly whatever is happening in our lives. It will not eliminate life’s pressures, but it can help us respond to them in a calmer manner that benefits our heart, head, and body. It helps us recognise and step away from habitual, often unconscious emotional and physiological reactions to everyday events. It provides us with a scientifically researched approach to cultivating clarity, insight, and understanding. Practicing mindfulness allows us to be fully present in our life and work, and improve our quality of life.

Mindful living is Conscious, Calm, Purposeful, Grateful, and Focused: it promotes peace and awareness.

Automatic living is Unconscious, Habitual, Restless, Rushed, and Scattered: it creates anxiety, depression and fear.

Mindfulness:

- Helps you live life more fully

- Quiets your mind, opens your heart and brings about balance

- Relaxes your body, reduces stress

- Retrains your brain

- Enhances appreciation and gratitude

- Helps you break unhealthy habits

- Minimizes scatteredness and distraction

- Increases energy

- Helps you love yourself and others more freely and deeply

There are four elements:

(1) Paying attention, Almost any person or thing we give our close attention to gains value in our hearts and minds. This is because it increases our understanding and appreciation. Because paying loving attention often results in valuing, understanding, and enjoying what you pay attention to, it’s incredibly important that you place yourself near or at the top of your pay-attention to list. It also allows us to recognize habits and behaviors that no longer add value and joy to our lives – you can then make a different choice that will lead to increased well-being, health, peace of mind, calm, and balance.

(2) living in the moment It is possible to think about the past or the future while being fully in the present moment, as long as we are conscious of the fact that we are doing so.

(3) simplifying Our time and energy are often consumed by demands of multiple obligations and opportunities. Mindful moments calm our souls, quiet our minds, and open our hearts. When there is clutter in our homes…simplifying creates inner and outer space and space invites serenity.

(4) breathing Breath is the bridge between body and mind and the gateway to the present moment. It’s important to pay attention to the breath, deepen the breath, and direct the breath to areas in our body and mind that need relief. Breathing from the diaphragm triggers the relaxation response in the body.

Have you ever started eating a snack bar, taken a couple of bites, then noticed all you had left was an empty packet in your hand? Or been driving somewhere and arrived at your destination only to realise you remember nothing about your journey?

Most people have! These are common examples of “mindlessness,” or “going on automatic pilot.” In our modern, busy lives, we constantly multi task. Its easy to lose awareness of the present moment as when we become lost in our efforts to juggle work, home, finances, and other conflicting demands. As humans we are often “not present” in our own lives. We often fail to notice the good things about our lives, fail to hear what our bodies are telling us, or poison ourselves with toxic self criticism.