Poly Pocket Podcast

A shorter than normal episode as we're both sleep deprived. not for good or exciting reasons but because we have a poorly child.

We cover, briefly, our week in poly and have a combined (and time efficient) 'What's in Your Media Pocket Review'.

What’s in my Media Review Pocket
Sexual Currency
Sexual currency can be defined as anything that's not “sex”, but you would only do with a partner. It might look like a five-second lingering kiss rather than a peck on the cheek, a suggestive glance, a compliment, an unexpected touch as you pass each other in the kitchen.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/Ck3J0jnAVAi/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Dr Karen Gurney she/her
Clinical Psychologist translating sex science + therapy to futureproof your sex life. 📖Author of MindTheGap. 2x TED❌ speaker. 🌈Psych @ #transplus

linktr.ee/thesexdoctor

Hunter is ill this week so, finally, the real talent is driving todays show.

Following on from last weeks review of an article in Vogue, we have a more in depth chat about whether calling yourself Polyamorous is a valid excuse for being a bit of a twat (spoiler alert: Its not). 

We also learn what an OPP is and we find out if Butcher is on-board (spoiler alert: she's not).

Anyway, the joy is in the journey so join us on this more pocket sized edition of Poly Pocket Podcast

Hunter & Butcher x

We finally did our homework!!

We've written out 12 rules for (our) polyamory and in this episode we will walk through rules 1 to 4. 

Rules 1 to 4

1. Always be open and honest
   1. Tell the other person as much as THEY want to hear
   2. Don’t hide, avoid or obfuscate, even if it might hurt the other person. But don’t be mean about it
2.  Safety first
   1. Condoms (Protect)
   2. Testing (Prevent)
   3. Fluid partners (Risk)
3. Trust yourself more than you trust others
   1. Never rely on a 3rd party to convey information
   2. What others want may not align with what you want
4. Enthusiastic consent
   1. Know what you want
   2. Know what your partner/s want
   3. Make sure both sides know 

Media review

When Did Calling Yourself Polyamorous Become An Excuse For Terrible Behaviour?

https://www.vogue.co.uk/arts-and-lifestyle/article/polyamory

Pocket

Reindeer penis - https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/mum-people-stitches-brazen-message-28350193

This was meant to be a quick episode but it turns out it had legs! Sorry.

We're two and a bit years into our journey and it's fair to say that we've both made mistakes. This means we've learnt a lot and developed our 'rules' to stop us from remaking mistakes again. We kept meaning to write them down but we kept adding and changing them so we never got around to it. 

This week we ask, before you decide to do it, should you? Is it right for you? 

We also catch you up on dog walking in Winchester, being an Ethical Slut and the risks of googling in Butchers pocket.

Hope you enjoy 

Hunter

As an established, married couple we operate through the poly and CNM world in a particular way. You assume because the people you're engaging with are also open/poly that you would all naturally land on the same page... this just isn't the case. Like within anything in life experience dictates your view point and you have to work hard to bridge the gaps in this to help one another understand why you're 'operating' as you are!
We've had this title prepared for weeks but weren't sure how to best approach it until a couple of days before our recent break with Bunny we hit on the idea of properly interviewing her to try and help couples who are dating others to understand how they may view you and why.
This is our longest episode to date but there's a lot of great content (we think) but also we feel it was valid to keep it in.
Sorry in advance for the poor sound quality - there isn't a filter on air bnb for 'Podcast Acoustics'...

Media Review - 

Ask me about Polyamory

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Ask-Me-About-Polyamory-Cuddles/dp/099646011X

What’s in your pocket?

Bustle

https://www.bustle.com/wellness/poly-relationship-terms-metamour-nesting-partner

This week…. Nothing. Nothing happened. Unless you count a wonderful weekend away on the coast with ‘the ones that got away’ (Mr & Mrs Gotaway). 

We discuss the all consuming first few months of ‘the lifestyle’ and what to watch out for at the various stages.

Media Review - 

https://www.instagram.com/reel/ChXYHl5FXU-/?igshid=MDJmNzVkMjY=

What’s in your pocket? 

https://www.readyforpolyamory.com/polyamory-glossary

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Relationships: A relationship in which a (usually formerly monogamous, usually hierarchical and primary) couple choose to allow each other to see other people but don’t want information on their metamours or what their partner does with them. Sometimes there is a clause included for basic sexual risk/safety information to be shared. The most extreme form of parallel polyamory. 

This week Butcher gets a massage, I eat a burger and we both have that little happy jolt of compersion where you realise how happy you are that your person is happy. We also discuss what happens when your partner falls in love with someone else and what we did when it happened to us.

Media Review - BBC - Bisexuality is the largest sexual minority. New report

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-63121245

What’s in your pocket?

Cowboy/Cowgirl: The gendered names for someone who acts polyamorous and then after forming a relationship, tries to remove their partner from the polycule to be monogamous with them. so called because they are "roping one off from the herd." Some folks online use Cowpoke as a gender neutral for this, although I haven't yet heard that used outside of an educational context.

So after last weeks episode where we pick apart how NOT to run a sex party, this week we thought we'd talk about our recent trip to Hedonism in London which is, in our opinion, how TO run a sex party.

Parties
Killing Kittens - https://app.killingkittens.com/home

Media Review
Sex Education - https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7767422/
https://www.netflix.com/

What's in your pocket?
Parellel polyamory - https://www.readyforpolyamory.com/polyamory-glossary

Sooo... You want to run a sex party. Let us tell you about the time we went to one and it was a disaster (FYI - Not hosted by us!). Somebody sold the dream but delivered a dodgy nightmare.

Keep up to date here - https://linktr.ee/polypocketpodcast

Media Review - Enthusiastic Consent

https://www.killingkittens.com/blog/what-is-enthusiastic-consent/

What’s in your pocket? Garden Party Polyamory

https://www.readyforpolyamory.com/polyamory-glossary

Garden Party Polyamory:  The middle ground between kitchen table and parallel polyamory; sometimes used for the polycule with a bit of everything, and sometimes used for folks who see each other at large events a few times a year.

This week we go back and review the time we went to Torture Garden together. It feels like so long ago but we’ve learnt a lot since then and trust each other so much more. We are on a journey together and we’ve come to accept that we will make mistakes but also that we can learn and grow as a result.

 We hope you find it interesting.

Torture Garden blog - ‘Permission Please”

https://www.torturegarden.com/permission-please/

Kitchen Table Polyamory

https://feeld.co/blog/feeld-guides/what-is-kitchen-table-polyamory