Practice of Being Seen

In this conversation with dad, yogi, meditation teacher, and entrepreneur KC Carter, you get spiritual truths, self-deprecating humor, brilliant social and political insights, and lines like: We’re all pieces of jagged glass in a turbulent sea and we’re all just trying to end up with some beautiful piece of seaglass eventually.

We know that relationships are a key aspect of the Practice of Being Seen so we asked KC for his ideas and insights about relationships. Listen in as KC discusses how people are drawn to those who will share the messy, uncomfortable parts of their lives. They need to see that humanness in order to make a connection.

A strong meditation practice is fundamental to KC’s personal and professional success.

We talked about how sobriety plays a key role in KC’s life. You can learn more about his program, New Sobriety, to help you shift e your relationship with “the drinks”: http://www.thisepiclife.com/the-new-sobriety-join-us-today/

When we explored how the KC’s devotion to meditation and spiritual development influenced his life, he says: “The loneliness of the spiritual path becomes a razor’s edge. The slightest wind can take you off. It’s a brutal fall and a long climb back up.” And he talked about how relationships support you when you’re on the razor’s edge. Relationships are responsible for everything including what resources are available and what resistance you encounter.

KC also describes the first among his spiritual principles: “don’t try to convert the people around you.” And yet, in subtle ways, you help one another soften all the edges. Influence doesn’t happen when you’re trying to be too overt about it.

When it comes to the meditative practice, KC says Meditation helps you “discerning between the signal inside yourself and giving into the static.”

The reality of meditation is that you start with a messy, failure ridden process. You need to just start with five minutes of clearing your mind. Visit www.thisepiclife.com/30 to get help launching your daily 15-minutes per day practice.

KC merges his depth of business experience with his spiritual work, improving workplace culture and introducing mediation to the office.

When it comes to succeeding at entrepreneurship and any other task worth doing: “It’s about the long game… it’s not about the next webinar and the next speedy step. People who have attained mastery have been doing it for 10 - 20 years.”

KC paraphrased Jon Acuff’s Wisdom 2.0 speech: “being brave feels like being scared sh*tless.”

The “lens statement” is very important to KC and he talked about how his own lens statement has evolved over time. “We live in a dynamic universe and things require upgrading. That’s why businesses also require upgraded mission statements.”

His advice: “Check in with your lens statement once a day. It becomes very clear when you’re not in alignment with it.”

KC left us with some big ideas about how important anchoring into yourself is in this unsettled time. And gave us some ideas around reframing failure and the willingness to publicly fail and the practice of being seen. We all have a fundamental need to be seen and heard. If we’re passionately pissed off about something, it’s because we feel like we’re not being seen and heard.

KC dives right in and talks about how we tend to equate materialistic values with being seen or “making a splash.” In reality, “what people really need is to see your heart and to show that you care, to look them deeply in the eyes, to pause, and to make time.”

KC also shares the current dragon on his path: impatience. He also describes how he sees this as part part of being a “white, entitled American male.” We love how KC is willing to talk about something that’s so much a part of the contemporary

In this conversation, relationship therapist Rebecca Wong guides us through an essential truth about relationships: Happy couples fight.

 

Fighting actually enables people to show one another that they matter. You can learn how to fight well and how to create a container of belonging in your partnership. In the face of disagreements, you can create a practice of commitment that enables you to tolerate occasional divisions.

 

Much of this conversation is about marriage and romantic relationships, but it will shed some light on all of your relationships as we discuss mirror neurons, the power of eye contact, and reading nonverbal cues. And, you’ll learn why it’s great news that 69% of the conflicts in your relationship are unresolvable.

Get Rebecca’s 5 Simply Magical Relationships Tips: https://connectfulness.com/happycouplesfight

NOTE: For the best listening experience, please use both earbuds! We're still mastering the recording process and, in this episode only, you'll hear Rebecca in one ear and Marisa in another. 

In this episode, we explore what the divine feminine is and why it matters to all people today. We begin to cover this vast topic with discussions about:

• the complementary dance of sacred masculine and the divine feminine
• when we can equate divine feminine with the goddess and when those concepts are distinct
• symbols of the divine feminine including water and the moon
• the power of the wild feminine and the significance of the shadow
• and, Marisa guides us on a journey to the mythic island of Avalon to help you understand what it means to make the divine feminine real in your own life

To learn more about the Waking Wisdom Within: Reconnecting to Your Inner Goddess retreat for women in the Hudson Valley March 17 - 19, please visit: http://connectfulness.com/wakin​​​​g-wisdom-within

“A story is true if it is well told.” We open this episode with a line from novelist Elizabeth Cunningham’s Maeve Chronicles, a series of books that reimagines Mary Magdelen as a Celtic warrior woman. It’s a brilliant truth when we’re talking about myth and fiction, but it’s terribly problematic it comes to contemporary politics. In this episode, Marisa and Rebecca discuss alternative facts, how they influence relationships, and what they have to do with storytelling.

 

What were the Women’s Marches about? Equality, standing against injustice, and making the holistic vision a reality: when something happens to one part, it happens to the whole.

 

“Can I believe you, can I trust you, do I feel safe?” These are basic questions we ask when determining whether we can feel secure in a relationship. In this episode we get into the concept of “gaslighting” and how it shows up in relationships and in women’s experiences.

 

Do we have different expectations about the role of truth and storytelling when it comes to our intimate relationships and the relationship between a citizen and a leader? To be storyteller is to be given great privilege and to take on great responsibility. We like to think it’s a creative, loving act, but it’s also an act of manipulation.

 

We need facts that we can all agree upon in order to create a nation. How do we settle on those facts?  We live in interesting times and we’re mired in the messy middle. Right now, we have more questions than answers and stories are being used in a way that seems more destructive than sacred.

 

You can reclaim how you live into your own stories and the stories you hear. Who gets to narrate your reality? Ultimately, you narrate your own.

 

PS: On second listen, Marisa realized that “we hold these truths to be self evident” is actually in the Declaration of Independence, not the US Constitution.

For more on how stories shape relationships and relationships shape stories, visit Rebecca and Marisa at www.practiceofbeingseen.com.

 

For more on Elizabeth Cunningham’s work, please visit: www.elizabethcunninghamwrites.com

In this conversation between Rebecca and Marisa, we explore some of the structures and theories that support our vision of the Practice of Being Seen.

Listen in and discover what Interpersonal Neurobiology founder Dan Siegel’s Triangle of Well-Being and the Story Triangle have in common. You’ll learn what it means to sense, birth, and hold an idea. And, we introduce you to what it means to be a Storyteller, Story Keeper, and Story Healer.

For more, please visit: practiceofbeingseen.com

Sometimes, the best way to see yourself is to see yourself reflected in someone else’s eyes. When you launch a new podcast, sometimes the best way to explain your vision is to have a friend come on air to ask you about it.

We invited our friend and colleague Robert Cox to interview us about our mission and our vision for the Practice of Being Seen. Robert is a therapist in the Kansas City area specializing in trauma, addictions and autism. Having been through his own trauma work and addictions, he has spent the past several decades learning to live in the messy and be seen himself while trying to help others do the same. You can hear him on his two podcasts, Mindful Recovery and Listening to Autism. Learn more about Robert’s work: www.liferecoveryconsulting.org

To read Robert's post, please visit: https://connectfulness.com/broken-spaces-lessons-healing-relationship/

To learn more about our community for therapists, please visit: www.practiceofbeingseen.com/community-for-therapists 

Meet your Practice of Being Seen hosts, relationship therapist Rebecca Wong and storytelling coach Marisa Goudy.

What can you expect when you join us for the Practice of Being Seen journey? Tune in for conversations and interviews that explore the stories, spirit, and psychology that shape our relationships and form our society.

And please pardon the sound quality on the first few episodes. It gets better - we promise!

For more on the Practice of Being Seen including our events, consulting and our membership community for therapists, please visit www.practiceofbeingseen.com.