Qualified Nonsense

Welcome to our nightmare! In this Halloween-themed episode, we unbury some vampire mythology, conjure up our thoughts on familial conflict surrounding Halloween candy, and scare up the idea behind America’s sexy costume obsession. Plus, we dig into topics like: Spencer’s gifts, kids’ costumes, ‘Nosferatu’, modern baby names, death in a theme park, the shift from clowns being wholesome to being creepy, the current state of clowning, and more!

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

This week, we open things up by trying out some tongue twisters, before jumping into our questions from reddit. We shame someone for traveling to Las Vegas on their child’s birthday, we discuss the etiquette of what to do when you wake up first at someone else’s house, and we discuss whether we regularly keep our phones silenced or not. Plus, we talk about traveling with children, one night stands, morning routines, feet, our own screen time, and more!

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

In this episode, we open things up by talking about the 1988 classic, ‘Big’, and how it plays to a 2026 audience, before talking about other childhood movies and skeevy music. We then get into reddit questions by discussing how best to deal with insulting an HR manager while unmuted on Zoom, and whether killing a 9/11 hijacker before the events of 9/11 would lead to a lighter sentence. Throughout the show, we cover things like origin stories in movies, H.P. Lovecraft, ‘Minority Report’, and alternate timelines. Thanks for listening!

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

On this week’s episode we are joined by Eli Green, our first second-time guest, and owner of Troy, MI’s Stumblebum Beer Co. Eli shares some unfortunate news about his business, but we have a cure for the blues with questions from reddit! This week’s topics include mundane tasks taking longer than necessary and the funniest way to say that you need to use the bathroom. Plus, we get into the current state of the beer industry, our recent viral video, navigating the healthcare industry, self-checkout, bathroom cleanliness etiquette, feeling awkward in someone else’s bedroom, and more!

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

This week, we open with a little trivia quiz about the cities we live in. Then we get into a discussion about train travel before getting into our main questions that include a discussion about examples of high risk/low reward behaviors, matcha tea, and an increasingly common discussion point on this show: proper bidet use. Plus, we talk about our brief minor social media fame.

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

In this episode, we open by discussing our personal hygiene preferences, including a fierce debate about overhand/underhand toilet paper etiquette. We then talk about whether attacking someone online makes one a buttface, bot accounts, the hostility of redditors, what we’re most afraid of, facing our own mortality, ‘Weapons’ spoilers, retirement anxieties, ‘Rocky and Bullwinkle’, and more!

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

This week we open the show talking about everyone’s favorite topic: local developments! We talk about the town of Estacada, Oregon, The Safari Club, a grisly murder, missed connections, types of coffee, dirty sodas, Zyn, and more! Plus, we answer a couple questions from reddit about how to tactfully leave a party and whether it is normal to need to spend all day in bed. We cover it all!

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

We open things up on a downer note by discussing the passing of Dolly Parton, our favorite songs of hers, and separating the art from the artist. We then get into how to properly dispose of old family heirlooms no one wants, and which skill we would choose to compete against 100 people in a battle to the death. Plus, we talk about how we’re not confident in any of our skills, lasting legacies after we die, and more uplifting content!

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

This week, we open the show talking about podcast statistics and how you, reading this right now, can help us grow! We then head into the content mines by answering some questions from reddit where we look at things that were once considered a sign of status that are now seen as cheap or cringey. Plus, we talk about Facebook Marketplace returns, a child possibly addicted to cigarettes, Brandon’s recent Ebay selling, stretch limos, Jake’s old Toyota Tercel, monocoque construction in vehicles, and more!

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com

After Matt donned his new shades in the last episode, the rest of the gang joins him with sunglasses and backwards hats for no particular reason. Jake opens by reporting sad news about friend-of-the-show, Eli, and the future of Stumblebum Beer Co. We then get a little lighter by talking about skills that take less than an hour to learn that makes one look like a genius. We also figure out the etiquette of showing up to a friend’s house early. Plus, we talk stealing credit card numbers, picking locks, D&D, Matt’s habit of showing up early, and more!

Check out Stumblebum Beer Co: https://www.stumblebumbeer.com/

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Send any questions or comments to: [email protected] and don't forget to rate, review, like and subscribe on your podcast app of choice! Thanks for listening!

Become a Patron!

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/QualifiedNonsense

Socials:

Discord: https://discord.gg/h8eXEEEFbc

Instagram & TikTok: qualified_nonsense

YouTube: qualifiednonsense

X: @QNPodcast

Hosts: Jake Wilhelmi, Matthew Ellis, and Brandon Bernhardt

Music: Ace

Sound Effects: https://www.zapsplat.com