RCCG Victory Temple Chantilly's Podcast

"Then He said to them, 'Follow Me..."" Mt

4:19 NKJV

Most people who decide to grow personally find their first mentors in the pages of books.

That is a great place to start. For that matter, it's a great place to continue. And the wisdom that's found in Scripture makes the Bible the best mentor's manual ever written. If you are not reading it daily, you are robbing yourself of the greatest source of inspiration and illumination. And at some point, if you're wise, you will also look for a role model to mentor you. No matter how gifted and experienced you are, you will go further with the right mentor than you will on your own. Jesus, the greatest mentor of all, discipled a group of men who changed the world forever. "And Jesus, walking by the Sea of Galilee, saw two brothers, Simon called Peter, and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea; for they were fishermen. Then He said to them,

'Follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men.' They immediately left their nets and followed Him. Going on from there, He saw two other brothers, James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother, in the boat with Zebedee their father, mending their nets.

He called them, and immediately they left the boat and their father, and followed Him" (vv.

18-22 KJV). Note the words "follow Me, and I will make you..." Just as the right mentor can make you, the wrong mentor can break you.

So you need to pray about this. Then you must do something about it. Why? Because if you follow only yourself, you may find yourself going in circles and getting nowhere.

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"Let me teach you." Mt 11:29 NLT

Jesus said, "I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it" (Mt

16:18). When He spoke those words, the religious leaders of His day were plotting His death, the society in which He lived was controlled by the might of Rome, and His followers were common people. Humanly speaking, what He promised was audacious, and the possibilities of it happening were zero. Nevertheless, it came to pass. Two thousand years later, He is the most quoted author in the world, and our values are based on the principles He taught. How did He do it?

By mentoring others. So when looking for a mentor, try to find someone who exemplifies the qualities and character Jesus displayed.

"Then Jesus said, 'Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light'" (Mt 11:28-30 NLT). Jesus used an agricultural illustration His listeners would understand. To get the highest productivity out of an ox, the yoke around its neck had to be a comfortable fit. And a good mentor is someone who understands you and knows what is the right fit for your temperament and talents. A mentor is an extra pair of eyes and ears and that always has your best interests at heart. When you think about it, having the right mentor is one of the best investments you can make in your future.

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"Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ." 1C0 11:1 NIV

Your mentor should not only demonstrate professional excellence and possess skills from which you can learn, but must also be someone who displays character qualities worth imitating. Bernie Madoff was one of the most admired and sought-after brokers on Wall Street. That is, until he ended up in prison for perpetrating a multibillion dollar Ponzi scheme that devastated the lives of individuals, companies, and even governments. Numerous actors, athletes, political leaders, and business executives today attempt to deny their position as role models when people are already following them and imitating their conduct. They would like people to distinguish between their personal behavior and their professional life, but such separation cannot really be made.

As you search for role models and mentors, examine their personal lives as thoroughly as their public performance. Your values will be shaped by theirs, so don't be casual or careless about whom you decide to follow. Paul writes, "Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ." You must be sure that the person in whose footsteps you are following is following in the footsteps of Christ. Why is this so important? Because there will be an audit! Whatever you have spent your life building will be evaluated at the judgment seat of Christ, and you will be rewarded accordingly. "Each one's work will become clear; for the Day will declare it, because it will be revealed by fire; and the fire will test each one's work, of what sort it is. If anyone's work which he has built on it endures, he will receive a reward. If anyone's work is burned, he will suffer loss" (1Co 3:13-

15 NKJV).

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"This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it." Ps 118:24 NKJV

One author writes: "One of the strategies I employ is to block enough time so that l'm not thinking of what I have to do next. I find it best to wait until I can invest more than a few minutes in being with someone so that the person is not frustrated with my divided attention and tight schedule." If you keep robbing your loved ones of time, there may come a day when they have no time for you.

Ask yourself, "Is this person worth more to me than the plan, project, problem, or pressure I'm dealing with?" Learn to enjoy the moment and focus on the person you're with.

Ask open-ended questions that encourage them to answer with more than a yes or no.

Listen carefully and ask additional questions.

This helps people feel you are engaging with them and caring about their replies. Yes, your thoughts may flit into the future for a few seconds, but instantly push them back into the present by rejecting those concerns. You can attend to them later. Concentrate, concentrate, concentrate. There is great pleasure in doing this after you get used to it.

The poet wrote, "I wished to live deliberately...and not, when I came to die, discover I had not lived." To make sure that doesn't happen to you, heed Solomon's words: "People should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God" (Ecc 3:13 NLT). If you have to do with less in order to enjoy the people you love more, do it; you will never regret it!

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"Jesus said to them, 'I am the bread of life. He who comes to Me shall never hunger."" Jn 6:35 NKJV

After World War II, Europe was devastated with hungry, homeless children who had been orphaned by the battles. They were put in large camps where they were given food and care. Yet they didn't sleep well at night; they were nervous, fearful, and fidgety. The caregivers were baffled until a psychologist taught them to offer each child a piece of bread every night, not to eat, but to hold in bed. The outcome was astonishing. The children slept through the night because they realized they wouldn't go hungry the next day.

Clutching the bread gave them a sense of protection (they were safe), importance (somebody cared about them), and happiness (there will be more bread tomorrow). Those three things were what those children needed

-and they are what you need too. And all three can be found in a relationship with Jesus. When He said, "I am the bread of life.

He who comes to Me shall never hunger," He was saying, "I am to your soul what food is to your

 body." Bread is one thing most of us have in common. It doesn't belong only to a particular region or nation. It's available in all shapes and sizes. In the UK, it may be scones; in South America, tortillas; in New York, bagels; and in Ethiopia, injera. In a simple statement, Jesus reminds us that He is our nourishment, everywhere, every time. So, be sure to read your Bible every day; it's your daily bread.

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"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Php 4:13 NKJV

Self-help books sometimes claim you can change your life in five or ten simple steps. It takes a lot more than that to make substantial and lasting changes in your life. First, change comes by drawing on a power greater than your own -God's power. Paul writes: "I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound.

Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (vv. 12-

13 NKJV). Second, change comes from steady and determined hard work and effort.

"Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart" (Gal 6:9 NKJV). The key is to understand that a bad day does not make you a failure; it doesn't last, it's just a bad day.

After you have had one, and all of us have, you just start back on track the following day.

Don't quit. Life is a sequence of ups and downs, stops and starts. Tomorrow is a brand-new day. What's necessary now is to revive your promise to make changes in your life and start from the place you left off. If you need to, seek God's forgiveness, forgive yourself, and begin walking forward again.

Make your goal your focus, not the fact that you fell off the wagon. Don't get caught up blaming others or yourself. Let it go and move on. Realize that the next time you come up against a difficult situation-and you will-in God's strength, you will handle it better.

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"He who finds a wife or a husband finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord." Pr 18:22 NKJV

Perhaps you have heard the joke about the lady who told her friend, "I didn't know what real happiness was until I married my husband, and now it's too late." Seriously, that doesn't have to be your story. Through God's wisdom, love, and grace, you can rebuild your marriage. To do it, you will need to learn the art of openness and allow yourself to be vulnerable, transparent, and ready to trust again. The only path to truly connect with someone is to genuinely allow that person to fully know you your worries, struggles, lack of confidence, hopes, and dreams. It is natural, especially after you have experienced hurt or rejection, to want to shield yourself and your heart from more pain.

Doing this makes complete sense in other parts of your life, but in marriage, shutting down your soul to your spouse will definitely result in further pain. Like property increasing in value over time, your marriage builds equity over the vears. Like methodical investments over the years. Like methodical investments into a savings account, modest deposits add up. Your shared experiences, such as the day when your child drove off to college, the company the two of you sacrificed and saved to start, the death of your parent after a lengthy battle with cancer, the birth of your children, or a surprise weeklong trip to celebrate your birthday-it all counts. These experiences come together as a beautiful canvas of intimacy that portrays your lives together. They also bring God's blessing. "He who finds a wife [or husband] finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord."

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"Husbands…be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect." 1Pe 3:7 NIV

Because something is said doesn't necessarily mean it's heard. At least, not in the way you think it is. The apostle Peter uses the words "considerate" and "respect." Both are essential to the art of listening, which is essential to a good marriage. Unless you're willing to consider what your spouse is saying and respect their thoughts and feelings, you're headed for trouble. The reason many couples come to a point where they are contemplating divorce is that instead of having conversations, their interactions disintegrate into sermons and monologues.

Counseling can help you learn how the other person expresses themselves. When you are focused on being right and getting "one-up," there is no room for solutions to emerge. The key is to try and listen with an open heart rather than a closed mind; learning to be vulnerable and soft in order to come to the place of understanding, where negotiation can take place. Some couples write letters to express their feelings as they navigate their way back to better and deeper

communication. Just as an artist waits for the perfect light to capture a subject on canvas, couples must learn the art of waiting to help reset their relationship back on course. This requires patience and dedication that are not always easy but very necessary. God's timing offers us deeper healing than anything we can construct on our own. If you are considering divorce, be sure that you have exhausted every other option first. No matter how bad things may be between you, with God's help, you can rebuild your marriage.

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"Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors." Mt 6:12 NKJV

Other translations say to forgive others'

"trespasses." To trespass means to go where you're not supposed to and do what you're not supposed to. Infidelity, dishonesty, and other wrong things are among the trespasses we may experience. Without the ability to practice forgiveness, even for the little things, it's hard to offer or receive the grace of forgiveness. To forgive means to admit to ourselves that our partner is not perfect, and neither are we. To fail to forgive is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Forgiveness not only releases your spouse from your anger and hurt, but it also lets you out of its grasp as well. It's impossible to stay married without learning to practice forgiveness. We need it not only for each other but to have a relationship with God, since God is in us and in our union. If the barrier between you and your marriage partner seems as big as a mountain, then pray, believing you serve a mountain-moving God. Jesus said: "Assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, 'Be removed and be cast into the sea, and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says. Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them. And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses" (Mk 11:23-26 NKJV).

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"Blessed are those who find wisdom, those who gain understanding." Pr 3:13

NIV

The wise old adage goes, "Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime." Sometimes what people need more than your money is your wisdom. By taking the time to share with them the insights and wisdom you have learned through your life's experiences, you're investing in their future. What a gift!

But that means you must never stop learning.

Sometimes we stop learning because we become complacent. We believe we have grown enough, or we want only to make the most of what we already have in terms of skill and knowledge. That's when we start to plateau and then decline. We lose our innovative spirit. We begin to think about being efficient instead of breaking new ground. We cut costs instead of investing in growth. Our vision becomes very limited. And instead of playing to win, we start playing not to lose. We all love doing what we're good at, but being good at something requires us to keep our skills sharp. Less skill leads to less enthusiasm and eventually to discontent. If we reach this stage, we start looking behind us because that's where our best days are.

We think about the good old days, the glory days. At that point, we're only a few short steps from obsolescence. Nobody wants to learn from a has-been. If you want to give until you have given all you have, you must keep growing until you can grow no more.

"Blessed are those who find wisdom, those who gain understanding."

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