Something most of the neurodivergent people I talk to have in common is a sense of not belonging. Connecting is supposed to be natural—but for many of us, it never feels that simple. In this solo episode, I explore some of my early friendships, what it means to want friendships and relationships while not understanding how they work. I tried learning from books and TV, and by trying to decipher how other people behaved, but it often didn't make sense or work for me. It wasn't obvious. 

This episode isn't a one-size-fits-all checklist or suggestion box—it's an invitation to get curious. It's about viewing friendship, connection, and relationships not as things we’re just supposed to know how to do, but as things we can learn, study, question, and create our own ideas for.

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In this solo episode, I’m talking about a phrase that’s been hounding me for decades: why can’t I just? Why can’t I just be easygoing? Be normal? Be fine with things that make no sense? It sounds small, but it’s actually huge—and it’s shaped so much of how I’ve lived. I’m pulling apart the layers of self-management, shame, and survival that come with being neurodivergent in a world that isn't always clear or understandable. And I’m wondering out loud what changes when we ask that same question—but with curiosity instead of criticism. 

Why Can't I Just  companion essay

In this conversation with 28-year-old writer and interdisciplinary artist Kelly Shannon, we dig into the complex landscape of identity, burnout, and diagnosis. We talk about policing your own intensity, contradicting the narrative of exhaustion, how the toll of performing normal led her to seek answers, and that weird liminal space you're in just before and just after realizing you're neurodivergent. 

We also take an unexpected detour into the Gothic — yes, the literary genre — and how its themes strangely mirror the diagnosis experience. As an autoethnographer, Kelly has used her research skills to dig deep into her own story, uncovering exactly why seeking a diagnosis wasn’t just validating — it was necessary.

https://kellyshannon.substack.com/

Learn more about Autoethnography here & here

Laura Westengard - Marginalized Communities and the Ghosts of Insidious Trauma

Sarah Teresa Cook - The Body Responds (guest post on D.L. Mayfield - Healing is My Special Interest)

What happens when you finally get the language for something you’ve felt your entire life—but never understood? In this deeply personal episode of Rebelling, host Amy Knott Parrish interviews Kelly Hambly, a 58 year old writer who was diagnosed with dyslexia as a child. Kelly shares what it's like being at the beginning of another neurodivergent diagnosis story. 

https://kellyhambly.com/

https://boththingstrue.substack.com/

In this first episode of Rebelling, host Amy Knott Parrish shares her journey from lifelong outsider to late-diagnosed ADHD and autistic adult. Through stories of identity, music, masking, and self-discovery, she explores what it means to rebel against “normal” and build a life that honors neurodivergent needs. This is a podcast for anyone craving belonging without pretending.

In this episode, I’m getting real about what brought me here — from growing up feeling like an outsider, to trying on different identities just to fit in, to finally discovering my neurodivergence in my 40s. I talk about the power of self-understanding, the music that helped me feel seen for the first time, and what it means to rebel against the expectations of “normal.”

https://rebelling.me/transcripts#episode-1-this-is-not-about-being-normal