This very special episode of Alison Answers - Mission Awake is one of both vulnerability and incredible strength. Kayla Stoecklein lost her husband, Andrew—pastor of Inland Hills Church in Chino, California—to suicide. Being that Alison lost her husband in the same tragic way, Kayla and Alison feel compelled to awaken the world to the hidden shame that comes along with suicide. The aftermath of enduring such a painful and heart-wrenching loss can be too much to bear, but through these immense losses, there are lessons and messages that need to be shared with the world.

In the wake of Kayla’s husband’s death, she embarked on a brave journey to better understand his harrowing battle with mental illness and, ultimately, to overcome the stigma of suicide. She knew she needed to become informed on the painful grip that mental illness can have on someone, and now she shares her story with the world through speaking events and her 2 amazing books, Fear Gone Wild, and Rebuilding Beautiful. Kayla and Alison’s grief and pain have been transformative in a way that they want everyone to know how to support someone in the depths of pain, and also those that are enduring grief. 

Key highlights:

• Introduction to Kayla
• Alison and Kayla’s desire to awaken the world to the hidden shame that comes along with suicide
• Bedrock Principles
• Pain is transformative
• Kayla’s tragic loss and her mission to understand mental illness
• The meaning of the title “Fear Gone Wild”
• Her husband’s start of his mental illness
• “Rebuilding Beautiful” meaning
• The power of her blogs and writing for other people
• Realizing she was part of a bigger story
• Putting away the victim card and taking out the bravery card
• Vulnerability allows us and others to take off their mask- that's the key to relationships and helping others
• How we need to hear other’s cries for help, don't make it about you
• Advice to people that may have loved ones dealing with suicidal thoughts
• As soon as an outcome happens, everything before it is illuminated
• Reaching out to others if you feel this way
• Kayla’s life after loss - why she decided to move away and start over
• How to support someone in their grief when you feel like you don’t have the right words
• Your presence is a gift for someone dealing with pain and grief
• Triumph after loss
• When you see someone in shame, help them separate the shame from themselves

Episode resources:

Fear Gone Wild by Kayla Stoecklein

Preorder Rebuilding Beautiful by Kayla Stoecklein

Connect with Kayla:

Website: kaylastoecklein.com

Instagram: @kaylasteck

Connect with Alison:

Instagram: @alisonanswers | @lagercounseling

Website: LagerCounseling.com

YouTube: Alison Answers

Facebook: Alison Lager Lcsw Casac