Reel Diaspora

A short Wokie Pod about Gary Lineker when he claimed he suffered racist abuse because of his dark-ish skin. Obviously like a reverse Talk TV and Fox News I was TRIGGERED… and then did my own honest response.

Please note this is a parody and we are big fans of Gary Lineker

Show Notes

Here is a link to an article on probably the worst toilet paper friendly newspaper:
https://www.express.co.uk/celebrity-news/1631960/gary-lineker-alex-scott-euro-2022-bbc-match-of-the-day-twitter-latest-news-update

Nana Akua says the same thing I do but with less attempt at humour. Please click the link as they need the ratings:
https://www.gbnews.uk/news/gary-lineker-im-black-youre-white-and-your-comments-trivialise-racism-says-nana-akua/325414

Here is the clip of Gary Lineker curling one out in the 1990 World Cup:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9t_8pfbCH-4

Also it’s good to follow Gary on twitter:
https://twitter.com/GaryLineker?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor

In this bumper podcast episode (i.e. slightly more waffle than normal) we talk about the post Queen’s Jubilee Blues, Facebook’s monster that is the Metaverse, Joe Pasquale’s Stage Show Some Mothers do ‘ave ‘em and The Channel 4 Sell Off. Also we delve into the Johnny Depp verdict and the ramifications of… kidding it’s all fluff and bantz. 

We all know Prince Charles but do we REALLY know Prince Charles. Here are a few facts you probably knew.  
https://www.thelist.com/673243/strange-facts-about-prince-charles/


Piers Morgan is taking a holiday from his low rated show but… HE’S NEVER COMING BACK
https://metro.co.uk/2022/05/28/piers-morgan-addresses-break-from-talk-tv-show-after-andrew-neil-comparison-16727413/

Joe Pasquale’s new play Some Mother’s Do ‘Ave ‘Em is on… go watch it! 
https://somemothersdoaveem.com/

Ain’t Half Hot Mum was one of those television series that can’t be made today… it’s pretty… 70’s poor taste like Spike Milligan’s Curry and Chips
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It_Ain%27t_Half_Hot_Mum


Here is the bit where Stewart Lee disses Joe Pasquale. Ironic and funny
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2CGryAkxkM

Richard Madeley. The man the legend… read about hime here
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Madeley

A bad Bruce Willis film? Good heavens… actually this one is the worst. Try not to watch it
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surrogates

Colin Clarke
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8qxyJEnEJ8

Notorious B.I.G’s famous freestyle where he has lots of guns. Enjoy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGpxscefrDg


The terrible case of the Government trying to sell off Channel 4
https://www.theguardian.com/media/2022/may/08/channel-4-sell-off-will-undermine-pms-promise-to-level-up-country


Here is the Nadine Dorries terrible rap track
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLrUWOw7zKM

Far from trivialising the shocking tragedies in recent American history Wokie is putting his absurd point of view to an incredibly absurd situation. We fully expect more apathy towards gun laws and push back from the lobbyists… have fun…  

Show Notes

These funny and subversive people infiltrated the NRA
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/may/31/lapierre-nra-thoughts-and-prayers-comedian-jason-selvig-edited-

Piers Morgan tried to take on the Gun Lobby and not only was he fired he ended up being a Meghan Markle hating self publicising mentalist 
https://www.thewrap.com/piers-morgan-ends-cnn-show-gun-control-plea-video/

This is a good primer on how the NRA are so powerful
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-35261394

We have reached the podcast midlife crisis! 40 episodes! In this latest gabfest Wokie and Egg White chat about WFH where Egg White loves it and Woke thinks like that twerp Jacob Rees Mogg and people should come back into the office… watch the sparks fly on the arguments. We also discuss the current state of live comedy where Nish Kumar and Romesh Ranganathan getting odd bigoted heckles in 2022!
How can any podcast be complete without discussing Piers Morgan’s new show on some obscure channel.
Listen without Prejudice as George Michal would say without irony.

Our potential inaugaural live show at The ETC Theatre in Camden. This lovely venue is available to rent as a rehearsal space. Link is here: http://www.etceteratheatre.com/ 

Since Piers Morgan jumped from ITV Breakfast (and big ratings) his popularity has not translated as well to his new show Uncensored. Watch his show in the link below so he feels his show is successful… you don’t even have to watch it, just play on mute:
https://www.youtube.com/c/PiersMorganUncensored

How the lyrics to Paul Gasgoine’s song never won an Ivor Novello we will never understand. Watch the clip here and relive the 80’s when footballers played hard and ate kebabs: 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuLH7FuJbSs

The pleb that is Jacob Rees Mogg is pushing civil servants to come to work so read his utterly ridiculous way of getting them in:
https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2022/apr/23/condescending-jacob-rees-mogg-leaves-notes-for-wfh-civil-servants

Also 1 in 10 people want to come back to the office so Wokie loses the argument
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10844993/WFH-forever-Just-one-10-Britons-say-plan-return-office-five-days-week.html

Forget the Ben Stiller Travesty, the 70’s cop show is the best thing ever! This will give you a primer on Wokie’s idea for Trotsky and Hutch where Leon Trotsky reached immortality and was asked to come back to the police force teaming up with Kenneth Hutchison. Go Cops Go!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Starsky_%26_Hutch

We have reached the podcast midlife crisis! 40 episodes! In this latest gabfest Wokie and Egg White chat about WFH where Egg White loves it and Woke thinks like that twerp Jacob Rees Mogg and people should come back into the office… watch the sparks fly on the arguments. We also discuss the current state of live comedy where Nish Kumar and Romesh Ranganathan getting odd bigoted heckles in 2022!
How can any podcast be complete without discussing Piers Morgan’s new show on some obscure channel.
Listen without Prejudice as George Michal would say without irony.

Our potential inaugaural live show at The ETC Theatre in Camden. This lovely venue is available to rent as a rehearsal space. Link is here: http://www.etceteratheatre.com/ 

Since Piers Morgan jumped from ITV Breakfast (and big ratings) his popularity has not translated as well to his new show Uncensored. Watch his show in the link below so he feels his show is successful… you don’t even have to watch it, just play on mute:
https://www.youtube.com/c/PiersMorganUncensored

How the lyrics to Paul Gasgoine’s song never won an Ivor Novello we will never understand. Watch the clip here and relive the 80’s when footballers played hard and ate kebabs: 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuLH7FuJbSs

The pleb that is Jacob Rees Mogg is pushing civil servants to come to work so read his utterly ridiculous way of getting them in:
https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2022/apr/23/condescending-jacob-rees-mogg-leaves-notes-for-wfh-civil-servants

Also 1 in 10 people want to come back to the office so Wokie loses the argument
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10844993/WFH-forever-Just-one-10-Britons-say-plan-return-office-five-days-week.html

Forget the Ben Stiller Travesty, the 70’s cop show is the best thing ever! This will give you a primer on Wokie’s idea for Trotsky and Hutch where Leon Trotsky reached immortality and was asked to come back to the police force teaming up with Kenneth Hutchison. Go Cops Go!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Starsky_%26_Hutch

In this latest podcast after our hiatus, Wokie and Egg White discuss the Will Smith dry slap he got (Frank Butcher style), Jacob Rees Mogg, Ricky Gervais not getting a slap and getting panic attacks in Ikea. And to also be Meta we discuss the unique phenomenon that is Live Podcasts. Watching people chat sh!t on stage and paying for the privilege.
Topical... just like our cream.

Shownotes:

In case you were too busy to watch the slap here it is for your gruesome enjoyment:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=myjEoDypUD8

We love The Yorkshire Post and they have a great article on Ricky Gervais’s response to the Slap:
https://www.examinerlive.co.uk/news/tv/ricky-gervais-shows-what-thinks-23527391

Seinfeld in cars interviewing? James Corden interviewing people in cars? Check this out… people walking in mountains talking and here we see Jim Jeffries talking about his smackdown:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-529x4TNmQ

As an aside, unions are great so read about these guys beating out Amazon to unionise! 
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/apr/09/amazon-new-york-warehouse-union-victory-nlrb

Read about the insane genius that is Malcolm Hardee and how influential he was to the UK comedy scene:
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/obituaries/malcolm-hardee-485525.html

The 2 Pints of Lager Podcast tour is a thing (and probably really good):
https://www.irishmirror.ie/showbiz/celebrity-news/mellor-wont-tame-down-podcast-26516769

Aah… Casual Racism in children’s books. When you live in Primrose hill and order Chinese food it doesn’t make you an expert… David Walliams:
https://www.nationalworld.com/news/uk/david-walliams-books-why-has-racist-chinese-character-brian-wong-been-removed-from-worlds-worst-children-3407988

Also anonymous confession feed Fesshole is your thing for today:
https://twitter.com/fesshole?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor

In a rather fruity podcast we lower common decency standards to talk about VHS porn and its illogical successor Interactive DVD Porn. There is an update on the Jim Davidson sitcom and our ambition to make it the British Friends. How can any podcast end without mentioning the extremely right wing Skinny John Milius and his extremely biased moviemaking machine. This is the macho man who walked off the stage at a television presentation because the autocue wasn’t working. Enjoy more irreverent humour

Shownotes

We constantly bring up the madcap sitcom Curry and Chips starring Spike Milligan so watch a clip and see pre woke/cancel weirdness here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dd_Vjq5MEeQ

Also for Gits and Shiggles here is Spike receiving a lifetime achievement award and calling Prince Charles a grovelling Bastard. Comedy gold!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkOAUht3G5o

If you want to see something even more outrageous here is the Spike Milligan sketch Pakastani Daleks
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0n88tZQc4Q

Frankly we think Jameela Jamil is amazing and you should follow her on twitter. 
https://twitter.com/jameelajamil

Want to know what NFTS are? Read this article and be bored shitless at the latest fad like Global Hypercolor T-Shirts.
https://www.investopedia.com/non-fungible-tokens-nft-5115211

1980’s sex lines... they were a thing and now Netflix are making a movie based on it. 
https://nypost.com/2020/06/26/the-rise-of-80s-era-erotic-phone-lines-gets-netflix-show-dirty-lines/

Here is Michael Bay being less than macho and walking off after an autocue malfunction. His mini Pearl Harbour. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4rMy1iA268

In this podcast we delve into the insanity of the Diversity/ Non Diversity awards season where Ant and Dec and Wossie win year in and year out, Veggie Pret and other insane culinary choices causing food apartheid. We also can’t pass on the opportunity of mentioning Drill Karaoke… quite why people would do this for fun but then again stranger things have happened. 


Shownotes

Ant and Dec win 20 years running. Sounds like the competition with the white voters are slim. 
https://www.radiotimes.com/tv/entertainment/ant-and-dec-ntas-win-best-presenter-20-years-newsupdate/
 
Veggie Pret is real, Check out their Insta here
https://www.instagram.com/veggiepret/?hl=en

I couldn’t find anything about Drill Karaoke so here’s a thread on everyone’s favourite wally.. Piers “Morgan” Moron
https://www.reddit.com/r/britishproblems/comments/axw31r/piers_morgan_is_an_absolute_twat_why_is_he_even/

Woke Asian Guy and Egg White Ep 36: Jim (Davidson) or Jim(Davidson) Quiz Special.

In this episode we break down the recent Jimmy Carr Netflix Special: His Dark Materials and the difference in his edgy delivery compared to Jim Davidson’s old school ways on the same controversial style.  We try to prove this point with a superb quiz: Jim or Jimmy where Egg says a comedic one liner and Wokie has to find out if it was said by Jimmy Carr or Jim Davidson. Guess who ends up with egg on his his face? Clue: not Egg White ironically. 

We also have some post pod inserts by Egg White clarifying certain things because afterthought is a 
b!tch. 

Show notes

First of all if you are feeling generous please chuck us some loose change here. This helps us keep going with our comedy nonsense. Patreon: Patreon.com/fuzzydice

Woke Asian Guy and Egg White’s umbrella company is Fuzzy Dice.
Check out our sketches here:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiGNwY5l50I42A0MWnNrJyQ/videos

Check out a review of Jimmy Carr’s His Dark Materials review here before watching the performance on Netflix:
https://decider.com/2021/12/27/jimmy-carr-his-dark-material-netflix-review/

Bullseye’s Jim Bowen was a legend presenting the chintziest game show of the 80’s.  His show will live forever in our hearts. 
https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2018/mar/14/jim-bowen-bullseye-host-and-comedian-dies-aged-80

Piers Morgan has come full circle and rejoined The Sun. A match made in hell.check out his frivolous froth about Adele here and then burn the newspaper. 
https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/17436440/adele-axe-las-vegas-shows-piers-morgan/

We also give any chance to mention Spike Milligan’s Curry and Chips. Here is a link to a trailer so you can buy the DVD box set because it’s eye poppingly weird and so wrong... and so 70's. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dd_Vjq5MEeQ

History doesn’t get weirder then Bernard Manning guarding Rudolph Hell at Spandau Prison. How’s that for a C.V. From prison guard of nazis to mentalist old school comedian.  
https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/bernard---in-his-own-words-995481

In this wide ranging rant, Woke Asian Guy starts off with what the 90’s American sitcoms were like regarding diversity and uses Seinfeld as an example. We see how hard it was when the actors don’t look like the cast of Friends and how their stories were written. We then segue into the mistaken scientific fact that Squirrels are practically human… horse poo we say and we break it down to show you. And FINALLY! We have an audio trailer of Jim Davidson the sitcom titled: Jim Davidson is my Bigoted Uncle and Lives in my Attic. Rolls off the tongue right? Ok, we love the Headspace app but we have a niche market we can serve. Listen to find out

All that and still enough time to add some Egg White esoterica.

Oh and Spike Milligan.. the absolute G.O.A.T mentalist

Shownotes:

We all know Seinfeld is on Netflix and considering they spent 500 million quid on it the could have done the aspect ratio a lot better:
https://www.gq.com/story/seinfeld-netflix-episodes-cropped-widescreen-ratio

Anyone a certain age will love the wonderfully eccentric Spike Milligan but there were some things he did which were clearly questionable like Curry and Chips. Read the notorious history below and also fact check: His character was called Kevin O’ Grady. 
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curry_and_Chips

The actor who played the Pakistani restauranteur, Brian George is the hardest working man in show business. Click the link to see what he has done and as yourself… can you do the same Jerry Seinfeld?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brian_George

Typically mental, The Guardian did an article about human squirrels or something like that, read it here.  
https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2021/sep/13/squirrels-human-like-personality-traits-study

Want to go to the best sandwich shop in the world? Start in Los Angeles!
https://www.timeout.com/food-and-drink/best-sandwiches-in-the-world

Ok, we talk about headspace and we do love it! we suggest you give it a go as they are the best on the market for middle class people.
https://www.headspace.com/