Reels of Justice

It’s a graveyard smash when Jack Bennett (“Never Surrender: A Galaxy Quest Documentary”) meets Frankenstein and then also “Frankenstein (1931)” meets “The Creature from the Black Lagoon” (and fights him). *** “Frankenstein (1931)”: Big Ben Haslar. “The Creature from the Black Lagoon": Jack Bennett. Judge: The Honorable Ryan Luis Rodriguez. Jurors: Ryan Luis Rodriguez, Dylan J. Schlender, Maynard Bangs. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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Hell on Reels again walks the Earth when alleged hellspawn Clay Keller (“Screen Drafts”) unleashes his scary eyes and asks us to join the 1978 horror sequel “Damien: Omen II.” *** Prosecutor: Ryan Luis Rodriguez. Defense: Clay Keller. Judge: The Honorable Dylan J. Schlender. Jurors: Maynard Bangs, Big Ben Haslar, Dylan J. Schlender. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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The court is forced to run through one of those rubber tire obstacle courses when Bryan Bintliff (“Burning Virtue”) tactically disarms the 2008 war film “The Hurt Locker.” *** Prosecutor: Bryan Bintliff. Defense: Dylan J. Schlender. Judge: The Honorable Maynard Bangs. Jurors: Ryan Luis Rodriguez, Maynard Bangs, Big Ben Haslar. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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The Seven Dwarves have got winner this week when the Magnificent One Jeremy Black joins us to pit the original, 1954’s “Seven Samurai,” against the remake, 1960’s “The Magnificent Seven.” *** “Seven Samurai”: Big Ben Haslar. “The Magnificent Seven": Jeremy Black. Judge: The Honorable Maynard Bangs. Jurors: Ryan Luis Rodriguez, Dylan J. Schlender, Maynard Bangs. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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The court had a bad dream and wants to sleep in your bed when Triv (“Trivial Theater”) reaches out from underneath and drags you into 1985’s “A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy’s Revenge.” *** Prosecutor: Big Ben Haslar. Defense: Triv. Judge: The Honorable Dylan J. Schlender. Jurors: Maynard Bangs, Ryan Luis Rodriguez, Dylan J. Schlender. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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The court hears the lamentations of Case Aiken (“Another Pass” Podcast) as he oils up to crush his enemy, the 2011 remake of “Conan the Barbarian.” *** Prosecutor: Case Aiken. Defense: Dylan J. Schlender. Judge: The Honorable Ryan Luis Rodriguez. Jurors: Ryan Luis Rodriguez, Maynard Bangs, Big Ben Haslar. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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This week, artist Virginia Hagans (“Off-Center Albatross”) gets drawn into the jury as the court goes completely nuclear over 2023’s “Godzilla Minus One.” *** Prosecutor: Maynard Bangs. Defense: Big Ben Haslar. Judge: The Honorable Dylan J. Schlender. Jurors: Virginia Hagans, Ryan Luis Rodriguez, Dylan J. Schlender. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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The court has a coming of “rage” this week when Ryan Verrill (“The Disc-Connected” Podcast/”The Physical Media Advocate” Magazine) advocates physically and verbally for 2022’s “Aftersun” over 2016’s “Moonlight.” *** “Moonlight”: Ryan Luis Rodriguez. “Aftersun": Ryan Verrill. Judge: The Honorable Big Ben Haslar. Jurors: Big Ben Haslar, Dylan J. Schlender, Maynard Bangs. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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The court resists the urge to make ‘wax off’ jokes when Justin Andrews (“Mind Pump Media”) crane kicks 1984’s “The Karate Kid” right in the face. *** Prosecutor: Justin Andrews. Defense: Dylan J. Schlender. Judge: The Honorable Maynard Bangs. Jurors: Ryan Luis Rodriguez, Maynard Bangs, Big Ben Haslar. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

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It’s The 219th Episode Crossover Spectacular! Daniel Scribner stacks the jury with his comrades from the so-called "sexual core" of the Cinemania Society as he defends 1996’s “The Long Kiss Goodnight.” *** Prosecutor: Maynard Bangs. Defense: Daniel Scribner. Judge: The Honorable Big Ben Haslar. Jurors: Andrea Palladino, Ethan Ireland, Andy Slack. Alternate Jurors: Zacharia Berks, Ryan Luis Rodriguez, Dylan J. Schlender. *** Advisory: Silvana Carranza. Prologue: Kirk R. Thatcher. Original Theme: WT Golden.

What did you think of the verdict?