On this episode of Reporting as Eligible, Paul, Matub, and JR discuss the crazy weekend of college football and how great it was, the Bears and their silly stadium proposal, how they are cursed, just as Oedipus was cursed to kill his father and sleep with his mother, and of course, the upcoming game against the Vikings.

Why is it especially bad to face the Vikings in the first game? Is Cameron Dantzler really that slow? Is Patrick Peterson still good? Are the Vikings still beset by nepotism? Who is going to cover Justin Jefferson? And what if Allen Lazard can’t go?

The guys discuss the Packer offensive line, and what will happen if Jenkins and Bakhtiari can’t go, whether Jalen Reagor can be useful cog in the Viking offense, a hunch about Christian Watson, and why Chandon my be a bigger key to the game than you think. Plus, listener questions from Patreon, Twitter, and the APC discord, and JR getting mad about the Brewer game in real time.

Intro: Little Red Corvette - Gear Daddies (Prince Cover)

Outro: Super Sex - Morphine