Even if you craft the perfect divorce agreement, disputes still arise post-divorce. As circumstances change, conflicts come up. So, what should you do when you and your ex disagree? How might you leverage mediation to resolve those conflicts with less frustration and resentment?

Erik Wheeler is the Founder and Family Mediator at Accord Mediation, a practice out of Burlington, Vermont, that specializes in divorce and post-divorce mediation. Erik uses conflict resolution and divorce mediation to help couples navigate disagreements around parenting schedules, custody and finances. Erik is also the co-creator of Divorce Peacefully, a webinar designed to educate divorcing couples about the alternatives to litigation—mediation and collaborative divorce. 

 On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Erik joins Katherine to discuss the most common conflicts that come up after a divorce, explaining why it’s crucial to get granular on the details of your parenting agreement. He describes how a mediator can help facilitate difficult discussions and shares his approach to resolving conflicts like who will claim the children on their taxes and how to split your kid’s expenses. Listen in for Erik’s insight on the challenges that come up when one parent relocates and learn how mediation can help you and your ex find solutions that work well for your family’s future.

Topics Covered  

Erik’s insight on the kinds of conflict that come up after a divorce

Why it’s crucial for divorcing couples to get specific on the details of their parenting agreement

How the introduction of new partners can exacerbate conflict in divorced couples

How a mediator helps facilitate difficult discussions by focusing on interests vs. positions

What makes mediation a better option than litigation in finding solutions that work well for your family

How to resolve conflicts around who will claim the children on taxes

The challenges that come up when one parent relocates

Erik’s approach to conflicts around splitting your kid’s expenses (including tuition)

Why Erik suggests going to mediation as soon as a conflict arises

Connect with Erik Wheeler

Accord Mediation: https://www.accordmediationvt.com/

Accord Mediation on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vermontmediator/

Call (802) 391-4121

Connect with Katherine Miller

The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/

Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/

Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1

The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246

Email: [email protected]

Call (914) 738-7765

Resources

Erik’s Divorce Peacefully Webinar: https://howtodivorcepeacefully.com/

SupportPay: https://supportpay.com/

2Houses: https://www.2houses.com/en