While Lum relaxes in jail, he has decided to write the sad tale of his memoirs as a martyr. Today, we find Abner dealing with his duties as town marshal, jailer, and Lum’s keeper.

Lending his ear to the cause, Abner listens to the journal that Lum hass kept to date. The tale is sad enough, though not very true. All that heartache and junk is sure to make good reading as Lum records his biography.

To enhance his woeful conditions, Lum wishes for a rainy day, a moldy crusst of bread, and things that will lend an unvarnished air of truth to his book. Anything to make his suffering all the more real. Maybe a few favors from Abner will help? How far will Abner go to help Lum in suffering?

On a hot day in the city, an immigrant man who runs a produce stand may soon need help from Philip Marlowe. Though Marlowe would rather just pick up the items he needs from the merchants, he ends up with a lot of gossip.

Trying to mind his own business, Marlowe soon has a brush with trouble. Dom is the son of one of the vendors, and has fallen into bad company. After a fender bender, Philip decides to have a beer while he waits. A thump on the head awaits when Dom, and his gang buddy don’t like Marlowe snooping around.

Before he can go home, and just rest his head, Marlowe has another encounter with Dom, but the message he gives the young thug sends him running home. Who is Helena, and why did she have such an affect over Dom? Can Marlowe help with the family problem that he has uncovered?

1963's Not so hits that entered at and stayed at the bottom of the top 100 and have since been forgotten.

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Commemorating victory throughout the world. Bing Crosby hosts, and to kick off peace braking out all over the world, a scrapbook of memories over the past few years on the show are gathered.

Playlist:

* To help him, Dinah Shore sings, I’ll Walk Alone.

* Bette Davis appears and talks with Jimmy Durante. Will she be able to help him climb into a higher social status? Jose Iturby meets Jimmy, and the two piano players swap jokes.

* Marlena Dietrich takes the stage to say a few words to the troops. Followed by another salute to the troops, and their efforts in the war is presented.

* Bing introduces Ginny Simms to sing, You’d Be So Nice to Come Home To.

* Bing calls out Frank Sinatra for some jokes on age, weight, and sons. They sing a medley to include: You Are My

Sunshine, Sonny Boy, You’re the Tops, and others that they take liberties with lyrics to continue the teasing each other. Frank sings, What is America to Me.

* A roll call of performers who appeared to support the troops is called off. All the big names on the radio, and entertainment industry.

* After the station break Bing sings, San Fernando Valley.

* Harry Vonzel presents sounds from home. A sigh from Lucille Ball, the sound of a bugler being shot, and more.

* GI Jill presents Johnny Mercer to sing his hit, GI Jive.

* Edward G Robinson and Orson Wells recreate famous words spoken into the microphone over the last few years.

* Bing salutes his pal Bob Hope, who couldn’t make the festivities.

* Danny Kaye sings about the troubles he went through to see a move.

* Carmen Miranda sings, Chico Chico.

* Claudette Colbert introduces Ed “Archie” Gardner from Duffy’s tavern. The two discuss the atmosphere, and food found in the tavern. Will the pair have an acting career together?

*

A final parting word is a prayer of thanksgiving to the lord for the price paid for peace.

Waiting in jail, Lum has it pretty comfortable. Cedric pops in to have town marshal Abner let him deliver a cake to Lum. Abner sure hopes its a chocolate one, that’s his favorite.

Why does Cedric insist on

Abner talks with his poppa, Phinus, about his worries that made him do the unthinkable, and arrest his best friend. Lum seems to be taking it all in stride, and sings the blues in his jail cell.

Deciding too take advantage of his turn of luck, being arrested though trying to do the right thing, Lum feels he needs more creature comforts. Comfortable chairs, feather beds, and some of Lizabeth’s best cooking. How else will he be able to concentrate on writing his memoirs?

As Lum reviews the jovial way BJ Webster went along with his courtroom drama, Lum begins to get suspicious over who could have tipped him off to his plan for helping grandpap.

Averting using questionable means, Lum is certain he has BJ Webster over a barrel. No matter how you look at it, the springs belong to grandpap, and BJ loses. On a side note, and in supporting the war effort, the gents discuss the proper way that ration stamps are to be used.

When Lum leaves to take care of business at the county seat, Abner is bursting at the seams to tell his secret to grandpap . How is the new rationing stamp system going?

Finally, BJ Webster tells Abner about his own charge against Lum. For misusing the fines he levied on the court case, Lum is being charged on embezzlement. Now its up to constable Abner to serve the arrest papers.

More great songs from1962 that didn't quite become the smash successes the artist would have liked, however they did chart either briefly or low on the charts.

After a night on the town, we learn how well Ozzie has contained himself after only one beer. Not to mention the skills at hosting parties. Jokes, dancing, and the way that Ozzie feels tha Harriet exaggerate too much. As she heads to the kitchen, David enters to chat with his dad about Harriet’s stretching the truth. What kind of plan does Ozzie have in mind to cure his wife?

Tal tales are told at the meal table. Fabulous feats at feasting are stopped when Gloria the maid enters with her own stretched truth. Will it phase Harriet at all?

The King Sisters sing, I Don’t Care.

Sharing his troubles to the neighbor girl, Emmy Lou, Ozzie decides on a more aggressive solution. Harriet wants to have an antique dealer assess their furniture, so Ozzie decides to how her how silly it is to exaggerate by inflating all the prices on their living room furniture. Be prepared for his plan to backfire. The assessor turns out to be from the tax office. Exaggerating gets Ozzie deeper into trouble, can it somehow get him out of it?