First thing that God said was not good:

Genesis 2:18

The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

Ecclesiastes 4:9 (NLT)

Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.

We are going to take a test to see if our dating is healthy:

1- The Progression Test

Proverbs 25:17

Don’t spend too much time in your neighbor’s house. Otherwise, they’ll get fed up with you and hate you.

2- The Physical Test.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20

18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

3- The Priority Test.

Matthew 19:5-6

…a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Matthew 22:37-39

37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

Exodus 34:14

Do not worship any other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.

Exodus 20:1-5 (Ten Commandments)

1 And God spoke all these words:2 “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.3 “You shall have no other gods before me.4 “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. 5 You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God,

Tips for Dating:

1. Keep the main thing the main thing

Matthew 6:33 / Matthew 22:37-40

2. Two Boo’s make a BOO BOO

Isaiah 58:11

3. Don’t settle for a snack

Song of Solomon 2:3 / 2 Samuel 11:1-4

4. Your Vibe attracts your Tribe

Prov 23:7

5. Set the Tone

1 Corinthians 10:13

6. Honesty is the best policy

Proverbs 18:21

1 Corinthians7:7-9, 32-34

7 I wish everyone could get along without marrying, just as I do. But we are not all the same. God gives some the gift of a husband or wife, and others he gives the gift of being able to stay happily unmarried. 8 So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—better to stay unmarried if you can, just as I am. 9 But if you can’t control yourselves, go ahead and marry. It is better to marry than to burn with lust. 1 Corinthians 7:7-9

32 I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. 33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— 34 and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband.1 Corinthians 7:32-34

Things God desires to give you before a partner:

1- Developing a love for self.

I want you to live as free of complications as possible. 1 Corinthians 7:32

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: Ecclesiastes 3:1

36 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” Matthew 22:36-38

 1 Corinthians 7:7

13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:13-16

2- Developing a love for God.

32 I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. 33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— 34 and his interests are divided.1 Corinthians 7:32-34

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.Matthew 6:33

37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment.Matthew 22:37-38

3- Developing a love for your purpose.

1 Corinthians 7:33-34

James 5:13-20

Is anyone among you in trouble? Let them pray. Is anyone happy? Let them sing songs of praise. James 5:13

Reasons James tells us we should pray:

1- Prayer leads us from suffering to relief

Is anyone among you in trouble? Let them pray. Is anyone happy? Let them sing songs of praise. James 5:13

Cast all your cares upon Him, for He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

Call on me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you will honor me. Psalm 50:15

2- Prayer leads us from sickness to recovery

Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. James 5:14-15

3- Prayer leads us from sin to redemption

If they have sinned, they will be forgiven.  Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. James 5:15-16

4- Prayer leads us from ordinary to extraordinary power.

The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. Elijah was a human being, even as we are. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years. Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops. James 5:17-18

Process of praying:

“‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one for yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.’ Matthew 6:9

James 4:1-10

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? James 4:1

Two reasons why conflict:

1- Problem one- Selfish Heart

Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? 2 You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. 3 When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures. James 4:1-3

An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot-tempered one commits many sins. Proverbs 29:11

A quick-tempered man does foolish things. Proverbs 14:17

Man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. James 1:20

2- Problem three- Adulterous Heart

You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. James 4:4

But like a woman unfaithful to her husband, so you, Israel, have been unfaithful to me, declares the Lord. Jeremiah 2:20

Or do you think Scripture says without reason that he jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us? James 4:5

3- Prescription (Solution) - Humble Heart

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble." James 4:6

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross! Philippians 2:3-8

Process of getting rid of conflict:

1. Submit to God

Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. James 4:7

2. Draw near to God

Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. James 4:8

That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

3. Humble yourself before God

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. James 4:10

James 3

The Power of the Tongue::

1- The tongue can direct life.

When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. James 3:3-4

2- The tongue can destroy life.

5 Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. 6 The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. James 3:5-6

3- The tongue can be divided in life.

9 With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. 10 Out of the same mouth James 3:9-10

The Problem of the Tongue:

11 Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? 12 My brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water. James 3:11-12

7 All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. James 3:7-8

1- Change of HEART

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer. Psalm 19:14

2- Change of input

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Romans 12:2

3- Change of Words

Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone. Colossians 4:6

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29

James 2

1)  Examine/faith/change

2) Three types of faith in James 2

3) Three types of faith

James 1:1

James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations: Greetings.

James 1:2-3

2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

Two things::

1- Trials are going to happen

James 1:2

2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds.

2- Trials have a purpose

James 1:4

Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Two reasons we struggle with trials::

1- Lack of wisdom

James 1:5

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

2- Lack of faith

James 1:6-8

6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

1. Deception

James 1:13

13 When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone;

2. Desire

James 1:14

14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed.

3. Disobedience

James 1:15

15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin;

4. Death

James 1:15

15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.

Help for overcoming temptations.

1. Identify your weakness

2. Understand there is power within you.

Ephesians 1:18-20

18 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, 19 and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength 20 he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms,

3. Look for the way out

1 Corinthians 10:13

13 No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

Isaiah 43:18-19

Three reasons why we don’t like the unknown:

1. It’s unclear.

2. It’s unsettled

3. It’s uncontrollable

Three things to move on from:

1. Move on from old history

2. Move on from old habits

3. Move on from old hurts.

How do I move past my past?

1. Remember your identity.

2. Remember to die daily.

3. Remember to renew.

Hebrews 12:1-12