Jordan and Charlie discuss 2016’s Central Intelligence, a movie that answers some of life’s most puzzling questions like: What would Dwayne Johnson look like as a chubby, brace-faced 17-year old? Why is Jason Bateman so good at playing total douches? Are Kevin Hart and Dwayne Johnson the Devito/Schwarzenegger duo of our time? PLUS, WE GET TOTAL ROCK BUTT IN THIS MOVIE.

Also!!

DJ reveals his inspiration for Maui!!

Hobbs v. Shaw has a release date!!

‘The Rock Test’ is the best way to protect yourself against workplace sexual harassment!!

Welcome to the Buzzfeed-ification of Rock Talk! The jabronis do the Lord’s work this week and rank every movie they’ve covered so far. And yes, it’s still technically a mini-episode.

Remember to rate/review/share the show on iTunes, Stitcher or wherever you get our podcast!

CHARLIE’S LIST

11. Baywatch

10. The Tooth Fairy

9. The Game Plan

8. Scorpion King

7. Get Smart

6. Gridiron Gang

5. Pain and Gain

4. Moana

3. The Rundown

2. Fast and Furious 6

1. Fast Five

JORDAN’S LIST

11. Tooth Fairy

10. Baywatch

9. Scorpion King

8. Gridiron Gang

7. Get Smart

6. Moana

5. The Rundown

4. The Game Plan

3. Fast and Furious 6

2. Pain and Gain

1. Fast Five

The jabronis make sure they're wearing their thunderwear to check in on Fast Five, a movie that many consider to be the greatest film-making achievement of all time. (Okay, maybe that's just us.)

Beaches. Action. Exotic cars. Bald, sweaty men standing so close to each other that they're almost kissing. THIS MOVIE HAS IT ALL. And we haven't even gotten to the heist yet!

Also!!

New Jumanji trailer!!

Dwayne Johnson gets the InfoWars endorsement??

Jordan and Charlie give their Rock Rankings!!

Remember to subscribe/review/share the podcast!! The jabronis will return next week to talk about their rankings in more detail.

While you jabronis were looking at that big ol' dumb eclipse, our eyes were focused on another light in the sky. We saw the Fast-Signal and we instantly knew there was Fast and Furious news to be discussed.

Tyrese gets in The Rock's mentions?

Michelle Rodriguez walks away from the franchise?

Hellen Mirren wants a bigger part?

It's a jam-packed mini-episode this week on Rock Talk. Remember to rate/review/share the podcast!

The jabronis wave goodbye to summer with the latest movie in the Rock canon, Baywatch! Did this movie fare well with the critics? No. Did this movie appease Bay-heads out there excited for a reboot? Not really. Is there anything salvageable from this rare Dwayne Johnson misstep? Probably!

Also!!

Boy hero saves sister's life because DJ taught him how!!

The Rock donates $25k to Harvey relief!!

Dwayne Johnson died this week but not really!!

It's a very special mini-episode this week on Rock Talk! Charlie travels to NOVA Pro Wrestling's August event in Annandale, Virginia to talk to Daniel Richards, The Progressive Liberal.

This guy has been all over NPR, CBS News, and Deadspin for his amazing performances as the wrestling heel in Appalachia. But what happens when he comes up to liberal country??

Charlie and Jordan also discuss a very critical element in the life of His Rockness: his diet. And yes, they discuss what his bowel movements might be like.

Also!!

Cod!!

Cod!!

Cod!!

AWW YEAH XZIBIT IS HERE TO PIMP YOUR ROCK MOVIE. Picture this: the year is 2006. NASA just launched the New Horizons rocket towards Pluto. North Korea just started testing nuclear weapons. Nic Cage starred in The Wicker Man.

It was an exciting time, but it was also kind of scary. The Human Race needed stability. It needed inspiration. It needed a football movie in which The Rock gives no fewer than FOUR "inspirational" speeches to middle school criminals. Join us, won't you?

Also!!

The Rock regains #1 social media ranking!! (SUCK IT, CARA DELEVINGE)

"You're Welcome" goes platinum!!

InTouch Magazine LOVES DJ's salt & pepper beard!!

STOP EVERYTHING YOU ARE DOING AND LISTEN TO THIS. We have some huge news in our second mini-episode. Dwayne Johnson has changed his famous "Brahma Bull" tattoo... and we have many thoughts about it.

I'VE COME FOR THE WOMAN AND YOUR HEAD. The jabronis are joined by guest Connor Weber to discuss Dwayne Johnson's first starring movie role, 2002's The Scorpion King! There are so many questions to answer here. Are camels really smarter than horses? What is a British dude doing in ancient Egypt? Why does Nickelback on this soundtrack?

Also!!

The Rock announces "Jungle Cruise" movie!!

Short film/commercial with Siri!!

Ballers is HBO's highest rated half-hour in six years!!

Jordan and Charlie are joined by one of the smartest and most qualified jabronis they know, political journalist Ed Demaria. They'll take a much-too-serious look at DJ's possible road to the White House.

Do campaign committees ever draft winners? If not President, what other elected position can The Rock feasibly win? Dwayne Johnson introduced WHO at the 2000 RNC??