Beyond Belonging: Turning Your Military Life Into a Career Advantage

What if your PCS moves, overseas assignments, volunteer roles, and constant transitions haven't only interrupted your career—but have actually been building it?

In this episode of Ruck Up Buttercup, we sit down with educator, TAP facilitator, transition strategist, military spouse, and community builder Jenni Fajardo-Dobbs to rethink the way military spouses talk about careers and mobility.

From navigating life as a foreign-born military spouse to building a career across overseas assignments, Jenni shares how military spouses can recognize the leadership, relationship, cultural, and professional capital they've gained along the way—and learn to communicate its value.

This conversation is for the spouse who's tired of feeling like they're always starting over.

Maybe you're not starting over.

Maybe you're starting again with more experience than you realize.

Real stories. Real struggles. Real strength.

00:00 Podcast Welcome

00:55 Meet Jenni Dobbs

02:39 Jenni Military Journey

04:38 Power of Community

07:49 Career Mission Spark

11:15 Advice for New Spouses

18:54 Advocacy and Resources

23:00 Working OCONUS Germany

29:37 Volunteer Work to Resume

34:16 LinkedIn Premium Perks

36:20 Share and Tag Resources

39:03 Rucksack of Support

41:11 Don’t Reinvent Wheels

42:10 Deployed Love Journey

46:47 Five Capitals Framework

49:18 Finding Your Community

52:16 MIC and Instant Bonds

59:38 Final Advice and Wrap

Nicole Gebhardt: Turning Trauma into Purpose Through Sobriety, Support, and Community

Trigger Warning: Episode will cover topics of loss, rape, addition and suicide.

On A Ruck Up Buttercup Podcast, host Ashley interviews Nicole Gebhardt—2026 National Guard Military Spouse of the Year, best-selling author, mother, and recovering addict—who shares her “pain to purpose” journey and the importance of community for military spouses. Nicole recounts childhood sexual abuse by her father, a gang rape in college, miscarriages, and the death of her son Samuel at nine weeks old, followed by being treated as a criminal and enduring an abusive, drug-addicted first marriage before fleeing with her children while pregnant. After remarrying a service member, unhealed trauma led to heavy drinking and a 2019 suicide attempt that she survived, prompting sobriety and intensive healing. She now writes books, coaches women, and starts pregnancy/infant loss and addiction support groups with each PCS, urging spouses to ask for help, practice gratitude, communicate, and build community.

00:00 Welcome and Trigger Warning

03:29 Nicole’s Pain to Purpose

05:40 Childhood Abuse and College Assault

06:47 Miscarriage and Infant Loss

07:31 Escaping Abuse and Starting Over

08:54 Alcoholism and Suicide Attempt

09:48 Recovery and Building Support Groups

12:25 Finding Her Voice Publicly

17:01 Military Spouse Community Rally

20:46 Moving to Alaska and Healing Deeper

23:33 Honoring Samuel and Talking with Kids

25:17 Journaling and Daily Affirmations

27:29 How to Support Grieving Parents

32:18 Build Your Community After PCS

37:02 Sharing Support Networks

38:11 Spouse of the Year Connections

40:09 You Cannot Do It Alone

41:44 Books Groups and Coaching

42:53 Hard Topics We Avoid

45:10 Boundaries and Honest Parenting

48:12 Addiction and Healthy Coping

49:58 Healing Habits and Self Care

55:01 Marriage Communication and Love

01:01:16 Find Your Community

01:04:22 Closing Encouragement

Connect with Nicole

Website: http://www.nicolebgebhardt.com/

Facebook: https://facebook.com/nicolebgebhardtofficial

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicolegebhardtheals

IG: https://www.instagram.com/nicole.gebhardt

Email: [email protected]

Books: Broken Wings Broken Dreams: A Mother's Life After Infant Loss and Miscarriage

The Healing Cocoon : A Mother's Emergence After Infant and Pregnancy Loss

A Queen Saves Herself: A Story of Triumph and Transformation

The Queen’s Companion Book: Rule Your Throne. Own Your Queendom

Purchased here: https://nicolebgebhardt.com/bookstore/

Find us or reach out here:

Website: www.deployedlove.org/podcast

Facebook: www.facebook.com/ruckupbuttercup

Instagram: www.instagram.com/ruckupbuttercuppodcast

Email: [email protected]

PCS Season Survival Tips with Isabel of Logas Mil Moves

Host Ashley welcomes back Isabel, Army Military Spouse of the Year finalist and president of Logas to discuss community, networking, and practical PCS-season tips. Isabelle shares her work in military moving (Logas MilMoves), her Mexico-based Guerrero Leather venture, and volunteer efforts supporting a free clinic in Chihuahua providing cataract and dental care, emphasizing long-term impact and avoiding scarcity mindset. They explore why PCS moves are stressful—compounded stress, changing housing, school and commute priorities, and grief over leaving people and places—plus the importance of attitude and how kids absorb anxiety. Isabelle explains families can choose movers and “download” their budget, warns about bad brokers/lead farms, and recommends partial PPMs, creating a clearly marked “do not pack” closet, advocating for nonnegotiables, and booking early due to seasonal capacity and heat constraints, while Ashley highlights Deployed Love’s community support across 12 installations.

00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro

01:29 Isabelle’s Background

04:35 Purpose-Driven Work

10:00 Community and Mindset

17:30 Deployed Love Mission

22:16 Why PCS Feels Hard

24:44 Priorities and Schools

29:35 Grief and Missing Home

32:17 Making PCS an Adventure

34:47 Mindset Shapes PCS

35:45 Kids Absorb Stress

38:53 When Plans Change

43:08 Taking Control of Moves

45:47 Avoid Broker Scams

48:15 PPM Costs and Work

54:06 Top Three PCS Tips

59:25 Protect Your Valuables

01:05:31 Resources and Booking Early

01:11:21 Self Care and Move Day Safety

01:15:53 Build Your Network

01:18:03 Final Wrap Up

Connect with Isabel

Website: Www.logsamilmoves.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/1BJKK7ttb7/?mibextid=wwXIfr

Email: [email protected]

More about Guerrero Leather and Clinic

https://www.guerreroleather.com/

https://www.guerreroclinic.org/

Find us or reach out here:

Website: www.deployedlove.org/podcast

Facebook: www.facebook.com/ruckupbuttercup

Instagram: www.instagram.com/ruckupbuttercuppodcast

Email: [email protected]

The Heart of a Soldier’s Child: Celebrating Military Kids and Community with Sara

Ashley returns to the Ruck Up Buttercup podcast after a break due to solo parenting and military life challenges and welcomes Sara, a Deployed Love volunteer and Fort Benning school liaison officer. Sarah shares her family’s connection to the military through her husband’s DoD fire service career and her experience teaching in Vicenza, Italy, highlighting how military school programs and youth sponsorship help kids acclimate, build resilience, and form lasting bonds. The conversation emphasizes the unique strengths of military children, the importance of community for families, and encouraging kids to “shoot your shot.” Sarah announces her new children’s book, “The Heart of a Soldier’s Child,” written in poetic stanzas and illustrated by her former military-student artist; it releases July 4 on Amazon, with a portion of proceeds donated to Deployed Love.

00:00 Welcome Back Update

00:32 Meet Sara Volunteer

01:22 Sara Military Journey

02:44 School Liaison Connection

07:04 Why Military Kids Thrive

08:26 Resentment To Gratitude

09:35 Cliques And Belonging

12:35 Skills For Life After PCS

16:39 Freedom STEM Spotlight

19:05 Shoot Your Shot Advice

20:58 Social Media Connections

21:23 Inspiration in Italy

22:42 Finding the Illustrator

23:29 Crafting a Classic Look

26:21 Book Release and Why It Matters

31:11 Giving Back to Deployed Love

31:48 Advice for Parents and Kids

38:23 Dedication and Farewell

Follow Sarah here

Website: https://authorsarahwest.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wisemanpublishinghouse

Find us or reach out here:

Website: www.deployedlove.org/podcast

Facebook: www.facebook.com/ruckupbuttercup

Instagram: www.instagram.com/ruckupbuttercuppodcast

Email: [email protected]

In this episode of Ruck Up Buttercup, Ashley sits down with Patty Sandoval, Navy military spouse, public health professional, mom of two, and Founder & CEO of HomeFront Haven.

Inspired by her own military spouse journey, Patty is on a mission to change how we support military spouses by focusing on prevention, connection, and peer-based mental health support before crisis hits.

Ashley and Patty discuss the emotional labor military spouses carry, the challenges of deployment, isolation, postpartum struggles, and the pressure of "holding it all together." Patty shares how her experiences led her to create HomeFront Haven, an organization offering therapeutic retreats and year-long support designed to help military spouses build resilience, community, and lasting wellness.

This honest conversation highlights the power of asking for help, finding connection, and prioritizing mental health throughout every season of military life.

💛 Real stories. Real struggles. Real strength.

Connect with HomeFront Haven:

https://www.homefronthaven.org

00:00 Welcome Back Update

01:55 Meet Patty Intro

03:28 Patty Military Journey

05:59 Isolation And IA Stress

08:04 Finding Therapy Support

09:16 Why Homefront Haven

14:07 Prevention And Retention

17:05 Tools For Tough Seasons

20:48 What Makes Them Different

26:45 Retreat Idea Origins

36:59 Retreat Details And Signup

40:58 Final Advice And Wrap

Connect with Ashley at [email protected]

More Than a Milspouse: Entrepreneurship, Community, and Not Waiting with Moni

Host Ashley returns to the Ruck Up Buttercup podcast after a break and welcomes back guest Moni, an Air Force spouse whose family recently transitioned out of the military and is navigating the learning curve of retirement and new insurance while enjoying reduced stress and more family stability. Moni shares her shift from building military life apps to growing a public relations agency and founding the Association of Military Spouse Entrepreneurs (AMSE) in 2019 to provide a verified, supportive, 24/7 online community for military spouse business owners focused on collaboration, resources, and making money. They discuss how entrepreneurship can address underemployment, identity challenges, and flexibility through validating offers, pivoting, volunteering to build skills, and using platforms beyond social media. Moni previews the third annual More Than a Milspouse Summit (Oct 7–9 in Arlington, Texas) and closes with advice: don’t wait.

00:00 Welcome Back Update

01:41 Moni Returns

02:56 Retirement Transition

05:17 From Apps to Agency

07:11 Why AMSE Started

11:26 Entrepreneurship Identity

14:27 AMSE Membership Portal

16:31 Elevating Spouse Voices

21:00 Social Media vs Community

24:32 Advice to Start Now

30:33 Volunteer To Break In

31:04 Self Taught Remote Skills

32:12 Winging It And Pivoting

34:35 Support Spouses Simply

34:59 Social Media As SEO

38:33 No Gatekeeping Community

40:17 Barriers And Passive Income

42:37 LinkedIn And Confidence

44:28 More Than A Milspouse Summit

51:13 Summit Details And Tickets

54:25 Final Advice Dont Wait

Find Moni Here:

Website: https://amseagency.com/

FB: https://www.facebook.com/amseage

IG : https://www.instagram.com/amseagency/ncy

LI :https://www.linkedin.com/company/assocofmilitaryspouseentrepreneurs/?viewAsMember=true

TW: @theamseagency

Reach Ashley at [email protected]

Building Community and Support with MilSpouse Fest Director Jessica Manfre

Host Ashley welcomes Jessica Manfre to the “Ruck Up Buttercup” podcast to discuss supporting military spouses through connection, resources, and events like MilSpouse Fest. Jessica shares her background marked by early loss, meeting her Coast Guard husband young, experiencing isolation without a spouse network, and pursuing education and service, becoming a licensed clinical social worker who still sees military patients. She explains her path into military writing and then joining Recurrent’s military brands, ultimately becoming director of MilSpouse Fest in 2025. They describe MilSpouse Fest as a free, family-friendly event with a resource marketplace and community-building that reduces barriers like childcare and loneliness. Upcoming fests include Norfolk and San Diego, plus an international tour to Osan and Camp Humphreys in South Korea and Puerto Rico, with attention to bilingual support. Jessica’s advice: embrace new experiences and help pave the way for spouses coming behind you.

00:00 Welcome and Introductions

01:50 Jessica’s Early Life

02:55 Coast Guard Spouse Reality

04:01 Finding Purpose in Service

04:33 Spouse Career Challenges

05:54 Ashley’s Military Brat Story

09:40 Why Community Matters

14:22 Joining MilSpouse Fest

17:13 First Fest Experience

21:55 Overseas Tour and Sponsors

23:38 Kids Welcome at Events

24:43 Raising Volunteer Kids

25:03 Military Community Then Now

25:18 Early Lessons in Service

25:57 Fisher House Memories

26:45 New Spouses Need Support

28:05 Collaboration Not Competition

29:05 No One Path Fits All

30:36 Fests and Guard Support

33:35 Take the Leap Solo

36:04 Use Resources and Show Up

40:48 Loneliness and Connection

41:24 Curating Help In Person

43:51 Deployed Love Origins

44:22 Volunteer to Find Purpose

48:08 Passing the Torch Forward

49:30 Advice Embrace the Yes

52:07 Closing Invite and Support

Find us or reach out here:

Website: www.deployedlove.org/podcast

Facebook: www.facebook.com/ruckupbuttercup

Instagram: www.instagram.com/ruckupbuttercuppodcast

Email: [email protected]

More information on MilSpouseFest

Website: https://milspousefest.com

Our Military Kids: Activity Grants and Courageous Kids Recognition for Guard/Reserve Families

During Month of the Military Child, the host of Ruck Up Buttercup interviews Kara, a retired Navy veteran, longtime military spouse, and executive director of Our Military Kids, about supporting children in deployed National Guard/Reserve families and families of combat-injured service members. Kara shares her own Reserve mobilization after 9/11 with young children and explains how Guard/Reserve kids are often dispersed and overlooked compared to installation-based active-duty communities. The organization provides year-round extracurricular activity awards (from sports and music to driver’s ed and unique options like Japanese sword fighting), sending a “top secret package” that includes payment to the provider and a thank-you loop to donors. Kara cites survey data showing high stress during deployment and highlights benefits like stress relief, routine, friendships, mentors, family wellbeing, and boosted service member morale. She also describes the annual Courageous Kids contest (550+ nominations; 26 winners) spotlighted on social media in April.

00:00 Welcome And Guest Intro

02:03 Kara Military Journey

03:44 Why Guard Reserve Need Support

06:18 Mission Roots And Impact

09:39 Activities As Lifelines

13:27 Stress Data And Success Stories

15:13 Host Military Kid Story

18:26 Connection And Family Morale

23:54 What Grants Cover

25:22 How To Apply And Package

27:43 Thank You Card Loop

28:24 Impact on Families

30:21 Unique Activity Requests

31:46 Guard and Reserve Support Gap

33:41 Courageous Kids Contest

38:46 How Winners Stand Out

42:14 Sharing Stories in April

45:12 What People Overlook

48:04 Advice and Resources

53:08 Final Wrap and Thanks

Reach us at

Reach Our Military Kids at

Facebook.com/ourmilitarykids

Instagram.com/ourmilitarykids

Linkedin.com/ourmilitarykids

Finding Community Through Spouse Associations at Fort Bragg

In this episode of Ruck Up Buttercup, the host talks with Renata, a military spouse and president of the Association of Bragg Spouses, about why building community is essential in military life and how spouse associations can help. Renata shares her late-in-life transition into military spouse life, joining the club soon after arriving at Fort Bragg, and how volunteering helped her find identity and support. They explain the club’s two main functions: philanthropy (raising funds for scholarships, continuing education, and welfare grants for local nonprofits) and social connection (coffee meetups, book club, nights out, luncheons, and other events). They discuss misconceptions that spouse clubs are only for officers, stress the importance of participation and volunteering to keep programs running, highlight newsletters and upcoming resource fairs, and encourage spouses to take initiative, ask for accommodations like childcare when possible, and ignore negativity in online groups.

00:00 Welcome Back Update

02:22 Meet Renata

03:23 Her Spouse Journey

05:56 Finding Purpose Volunteering

08:26 Building Local Community

11:45 Breaking Club Stigmas

14:36 Club Culture Matters

16:47 Programs Scholarships Grants

20:01 Social Events Internal Clubs

23:00 Kids Childcare Inclusion

27:14 Just Show Up

37:13 Funding Fundraisers Pivoting

41:05 Fundraisers That Give Back

42:31 Flexible Volunteering For Parents

44:16 Solo Parenting Reality Check

46:02 Stop Comparing Journeys

47:01 Join Spouse Associations

51:49 Resource Fairs And Scholarships

53:42 Deployment Support All Seasons

56:48 Podcast And Positive Community

01:00:15 Resilience And Survival Mode

01:02:29 Finding Your Tribe After PCS

01:09:56 Volunteer For Purpose And Resume

01:23:17 Closing Encouragement And Next Steps

Spouse Chat: Veterans on Becoming Military Spouses, Deployments, and the Comparison Trap

In this “Ruck Up Buttercup” spouse chat, Ashley hosts Lara and Grant, both veterans now military spouses, to discuss the shock of switching from service member to spouse, especially the loss of control during deployments, constant changes and extensions, and the value of understanding military language and realities. They compare deployment life for service members versus spouses managing home responsibilities, careers, finances, and reintegration challenges, noting that reunions can feel unexpectedly awkward and require relearning routines. The conversation covers career disruption, PCS barriers, stereotypes and drama in spouse Facebook groups, and how social media fuels negativity and comparison. Key guidance includes planning with flexibility, not overplanning, communicating needs during separation and reintegration, seeking supportive community and resources, avoiding assumptions, and not measuring one’s experience against others because every military journey is different.

00:00 Meet The Spouse Chat

02:28 From Service To Spouse

05:08 Deployment Extensions Reality

09:33 Losing Control At Home

14:13 PCS Careers And Money

16:41 Grant Love Story

20:58 Reintegration And Resentment

27:50 Spouse Groups Culture Shock

34:27 Prior Service Pros And Cons

38:40 Stereotypes And Spouse Views

41:26 Purpose Beyond Background

43:31 Every Sailor Has A Story

46:58 Spouse Groups With Empathy

49:42 Stereotypes And Reality Check

53:43 Finding The Right Community

56:49 Creating Content To Help

01:01:15 Parting Advice On Flexibility

01:05:55 Reintegration And No Comparison

01:14:39 Resources Plugs And Farewell

Find us or reach out here:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/DeployedLove

Website: www.deployedlove.org/podcast

Facebook: www.facebook.com/ruckupbuttercup

Instagram: www.instagram.com/ruckupbuttercuppodcast

Email: [email protected]