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Jasmin and Cherie crack open Jumanji and immediately descend into beautiful chaos: a totally off-the-cuff plot “summary,” an honour-system dice game that sends someone to the jungle, and a Moose-Marry-Avoid (grown-ups only) featuring Alan Parrish, Van Pelt, and Dr Smolder Bravestone. Along the way they debate who the real villain is (Van Pelt? The game? …Alan?!), compare households to the Parrish mansion’s mayhem (“monkeys in the fridge, lion in the bedroom”), and discover the board-prop wasn’t actually wood (resin nerds, unite). Roll the dice, dodge the mosquitoes, and enjoy the moose-chief.