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life had been rough lately and just the other day as my brain fog and emotional pain peaked ✨poof✨ i had an epiphany, and the course of my life has changed- it's almost ridiculous! here's what i've discovered....
for over a year and a half, i have not been able to make good art and as an artist, it really felt like death. it even got to a point where i was unsure about my purpose, because if an artist can't make art, then what is an artist? the problem gets even worse when i can't really do much about it because school is really at its peak and i have no time availability to do anything but schoolwork, at least until i can change my schedule around and make space for that. so what the solution? here are my thoughts...
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i may or may not have said that word five gazillion times in the past week or so. only why? what about life right now that makes the idea of hypotheticals so appealing to me right now? what are the dangers of not changing this pattern? can it be good in any way? here are my thought.
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am i worthy? am i good enough? is my effort good enough? is my best that good? good enough? all these questions and more have been on my mind in the past week as i've been dealing with a really rough time mentally, and so i though it would be cool to share how I'm working with it and around it, recovering while continuing to do and fulfill all my commitments
at work the other day, my co-worker and i were talking about how we were struggling to make time for our creative projects and how to solve writer or artist's block, which got me thinking about creativity this whole week... and here's what i concluded.
i was lying in bed the other night and thought to myself... "wow, if you told me that this person would no longer be a daily part of my life a year ago, i may have slapped you right across the face!" friendships in college can change and take on many different forms, but beyond just the normal varieties in friendships, there are a few common mistakes we have normalized as a generation that create space for unhealthy relationships and friendship... here are my two cents
i never really know when it's the right time to start. I always feel like i could've been better prepared for almost everything, while also thinking it's never too early to start or i should have gotten started on this way earlier! and so finding balance between both has been the crux of many courses of action i have pursued, and although there isn't an exact resolve yet, i have gained a lot of wisdom and attunement to a certain level of preparedness to call onto myself as "ready" to take on respective endeavors! and this little wisdom is what i am here to share today...
we're almost one week into the new year and to everyone's surprise, i haven't really been accomplishing my goals, at least not all of them. but i've come to realize that there may be more to it than me simply failing at something that loads of people fail at committing to, because trust me, i'm not like the other gurls! it isn't just my goals that have been off, i've been finding it extremely difficult to romanticize things even the basics of the basics that i never had any issues with, and so of course i turned to no other then mr. google to try and find the solution and here's what i've found.
it's time!!!!! 2 more days remain ahead of us before 2024 and all i can personally think of is how to make the best out of the last two days of 2023 to build good foundations of 2024 (or in other words get a head start.) i love myself a vision board but also some goal setting and newly this year, analog reflections (inspired by bestie ruofei.) we are here to kick off a wonderful year and make the best decisions right off the bat! no one is making a last mistake of 2023 and starting off 2024 on a messed up note around here! 2024 starts the night-or a couple days- before (ifykyk!!)
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