Title: Boundaries: Getting to the Root

Episode Summary:
In this episode, we explore why it’s essential to understand the root of destructive patterns so we can place boundaries on what truly matters—not just the obvious behaviors. We discuss how missing Truth, Ownership, and Empathy (T-O-E) can allow harmful cycles to repeat, and share real-life scenarios to illustrate how subtle patterns escalate into emotional, relational, and financial harm.

TOE – The Root Issues:

T – Truth: Protecting ourselves when honesty is absent.

O – Ownership: Protecting ourselves when others refuse to take responsibility.

E – Empathy: Protecting ourselves from indifference or lack of consideration.

Featured Story – Julia (Anonymous):
Julia discovered her spouse had been betraying her trust in ways she never imagined. Despite therapy and honest conversations, he denied, minimized, and shifted blame. He gained control over her finances, monitored communications, manipulated the children, and isolated her from friends and family. Left financially destitute, she filed for divorce and now faces ongoing post-separation abuse. Julia’s story shows the urgent need for safety, support, and healing for survivors—and highlights the wider impact of unchecked coercive control.

Scenarios Explored in This Episode:

Gaslighting and Betrayal – Sophie & Charlie

Addiction & Emotional Withdrawal – Claire & David

Emotional Push-Pull – Lena & Chris

Coercive Control – Hannah & Daniel

Healing & Support:
We discuss a 3-day, 2-night retreat in Utah for survivors like Julia, featuring:

Trauma-sensitive yoga

Therapist presentations

TS-12 Anon support groups

Kintsugi creative expression

Angel Whisper experiences

Community connection

How You Can Help:

$50 – Warm welcome gift

$200 – One full day of retreat care

$600 – Sponsor the full retreat for one woman

$800 – Retreat + travel assistance

$1,800 – Circle of Healing Sponsor (three women)

Every dollar supports trauma-informed care, safety, and restoration.

Donate: https://herwingsunfold.org/sponsor-a-survivor/

For a victim advocate to walk with you through a safety plan contact: [email protected]

Resources for Survivors:

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-799-SAFE (7233)

Create Your Personal Safety Plan

Connect with HER Wings Unfold:

herwingsunfold.org

ts12anon.org