It’s Halloween. It's Reformation Day. Is it EVP? Is it just a podcast? Is it an EVP Podcast? Is a multiverse plausible? What is the chief end of man? Where can I find a good VCR these days? Why are our questions so deep, and so tragically shallow?

Dave and Andy return to the podcast universe darker than ever. So dark, in fact, the video is banned in nine states. Something terrible is happening to them. They have so many grim - and hilarious - topics to discuss before their final destination. Like creations that kill their creators, patients that (almost) kill their doctors, and the greatest way to wait for death of all time.

Are you spooked? We're spooked. Listen for those EVPs, they could be anywhere. We're so startled. 

 

DO YOU DARE?!

 

Oh, and Dave shares the most -----d up DDYH story we’ve ever had. Ever. There's a warning, and when you hear it skip to 30:00... You've been warned.

 

A VERY spooky... Dude, did you hear?

 

We’re drinking #9 Not Quite Pale Ale from Magic Hat Brewing and Hell’s Belle from Big Boss Brewery.

 

Quickdraws include babies that don’t like ugly people, Mike Tyson’s crazy bribe, Sir Patrick Stewart’s surprising Halloween cameo, the US Postal Service’s multi-million dollar oopsie, the price of gas in Venezuela, and the audio herpes that is Now That’s What I Call Music.

 

Dave shares the disturbing story behind Denver’s giant blue bronco next to the airport. You’ll never look at that horse the same ever again. Don't look in his eyes... TOO LATE! I CAN'T STOP!

 

There has been a war raging between two major developed nations since the 1930’s. Prepare yourself for the epic battle for Han’s (NOT SOLO'S) Island!

 

Dr. Acula is in. Debauchery, dismemberment, and… paperback Star Trek novels? This is the terrible, awful, horrible story of Der Metzgermeister AKA computer repair technician Armin Meiwes. A bath hasn't sounded this bad since Nightmare on Elm Street. 

 

Andy already has your retirement planned out and it involves lots and lots of margaritas. Don't worry, it's not an early retirement, coins-on-the-eyes kind of deal... 

 

A lady checks in to the hospital with cancer and kidney failure. Everyone that came in contact with her ended up violently ill. This is the crazy tale of Gloria Ramirez, THE TOXIC LADY.  

 

Andy brings in a “choose your own adventure” to DDYH. Which dangerous door will Dave choose? Drunk birds, paleo diets or the unmarked sarcophagus? 

 

The dudes play the ol’ switcheroo and do I Don’t Recommend first. 

 

//DON'T RECOMMEND 

Dave doesn’t recommend trying to demonstrate the strength of window glass by throwing yourself against it. 

 

It’s fun to scream “KILL IT WITH FIRE!” It’s less fun to burn your parents' house down. Andy doesn’t recommend trying to kill spiders in a house with a blowtorch. Unless you live in a bunker. 

//RECOMMEND 

Do you like the 80s? Do you like nostalgia? Do you like 80s nostalgia? Do you like kids going on adventures with walkie talkies? Do you like mysteries? Do you like bicycles? Do you like analog synthesizers? No, this isn’t Stranger Things. Dave recommends the movie - The Summer of ’84. See it if you dare. You probably won't, since Andy still hasn't seen Turbo Kid. Poor hipster Dave. 

 

Andy recommends that you go arm yourself with a salt rifle. Keep you're (family) members intact with a salt rifle, keeps metzgermeisters at a safe distance of 1-2 meters. Killing bugs will never be the same. Go buy the Bug-A-Salt gun. It’s $40! Seriously, we want you to buy a salt rifle. Dinner guests will be required to don eye protection... this is one saline solution that won't clear those dry eyes. Unless we're having you for dinner. 

 

//PACKET COMPLETE//

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