This episode is also available as a blog post: http://thecrookedwheel.com/2022/08/29/sea-bass-in-ocean-have-no-idea-whats-happening-to-them/

OCEANS OF THE WORLD—Gasping as they struggled to stay afloat in their rapidly warming waters, the ocean’s sea bass confirmed Monday that they have no idea what is happening to them.

“We’re not sure what’s going on, but it feels like we’re being lifted up and tossed around by the waves, and we’re really scared,” said a school of sea bass who had gathered together in a frightened cluster to discuss how they had no clue why their natural habitats were becoming more acidic or why their numbers were declining so rapidly.

“All we know is that something is wrong, and we’re scared. We don’t know where our children are or if they’ll ever come back. We just want this to stop. Please help us. We don’t know what to do.”

At press time, reports confirmed the sea bass had begun to float belly-up after succumbing to hypoxia.