Second Gear Shenanigans

This week on Second Gear Shenanigans, Ian apparently decided to take John on a sunset date for the 20th episode. He made us have to record at 4:30 (we're usually done by 2). Well, since John loves his homie Ian, but no homo though, he happily obliged. Thanks pookie bear. Enjoy the introduction of segments and the Happy Spooktober visit from the demon we accidentally summoned last episode.

Welcome back, one and all, and a brand-new guest! Today, John and Ian accidentally summon the Cannabus demon. But he's just a chill guy who likes to talk about all his subsidiaries in the area. And yes, I used Google Translate to find the Latin for "We Summon the Spirit of Cannabus." Not sponsored. And yes, I know it's spelled cannabis. It's the joke.

It's a well-known fact that August has eight weeks. This well-known fact is reflected in the dialogue of today's episode, in which things are discussed sitting on the blacktop for eight weeks in August. Today's episode drops October 11th, and somehow, up until a few days ago, it was still August. Still August temperatures, anyway. I guess that makes it more like nine or ten weeks of August. August August August. aUgUst AuGusT. I'll stop saying AUGUST now

Welcome back, loyal listeners! Low Gear Lesson of the day: Be very wary of guys named Ted in broken-down Fiats on the side of the highway. You see, Ted is in a very fragile mental state and has drastically low self-esteem. He has fallen to the level of doing some weird stuff as payment for service on his car. Don't ask how we know. Also, apparently Fiat stands for Found On Road Dead. I would've guessed that would spell FOAD, but hey, what do I know?

Known in some regions as the "king of fruits", the durian is distinctive for its large size, strong odor, and thorn-covered rind. The fruit can grow as large as 30 cm (12 in) long and 15 cm (6 in) in diameter, and it typically weighs 1 to 3 kg (2 to 7 lb). Its shape ranges from oblong to round, the color of its husk from green to brown, and its flesh from pale yellow to red, depending on the species. The flavor of the flesh is complex with savory notes. The texture is creamy and pudding-like.

On today's episode of Second Gear Shenanigans, we return to our beloved establishment known as r/SheetyCarMods. I write "Sheety" in the episode description knowing full well I'm saying the actual word in the episode. Our hearts are broken to find that the bringers of terrible car mods have become apathetic to the sheetiness of cars. Those once strong soldiers of the faith have lost their way and fallen to the level of stock Honda Civics with slightly funny-looking spoilers. This is a dark day for the loyal core council of sheety car mod enjoyers. This is what the Apocrypha warned us of

Memorial gold dredges! Prayer huts of unspecified religions! Mildly sexist bumper stickers! Bowling ball cars! Ladies and gentlemen, we've got it all in this 2GS highlight reel. Come on down to [insert distribution service here] Lane for an hour of unrelieved ridicule and retardation with which to escape the crushing torture of everyday existence. Only 2 cents a month, apparently

Good day, my good sir. At this time we shall commence a special episode of Second Gear Shenanigans known as "Modern Classics." As one may gather, my good man, in this most distinguished of episodes we shall cover only the classiest of cars and - oh dear, it would seem as though we've encountered a riot-control combine harvester. I say, what a shocking turn of events. Oh good heavens, a goth girl car? Oh, how disgraceful - uh, cut to ad break! CUT TO AD BREAK!

Today's episode, loyal listeners, is a discussion of the many ways to die: discharging homemade cannons with a pound of black powder and gravel, being choked to death when a chubby little Asian kid clips a carabiner onto your choker in church, being hunted down with a shotgun by your churchgoing mother when she finds out you occasionally say no no words on your podcast, childbirth, and having a brain aneurism listening to Ian's constant nose wheezing into the mic.

On today's episode, the famed English words enthusiast JX Coalman explains why LCDs, the liquid crystal displays that form a key component of electronic screens, are not healthy for the human body when ingested. Or maybe he meant to say LSD, the psychedelic drug rampant in the 1970s that also is not the ideal thing to go inside your body. Ian, how could you be so careless as to let JX make that mistake. It's all your fault, obviously.