Diamonds in Dumpster Fires

Self-Compassion, Shame, and How God Designed Your Brain


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For many people of faith, self-compassion can sound uncomfortably close to self-indulgence or letting ourselves off the hook. In this episode, Melie explores why that tension exists—and why self-compassion, when rooted in Scripture, is not opposed to growth but essential to it.

Drawing from research by Kristin Neff, this conversation reframes self-compassion through a Christian lens, separating grace from shame and accountability from self-punishment. You'll hear how neuroscience, faith, and Jesus' own example all point toward compassion as a catalyst for lasting transformation.

Melie introduces the GRACE framework, a practical way to respond to struggle without abandoning truth, discipline, or responsibility—and shares a simple practice to help you challenge harsh self-talk in everyday life.

In this episode:

  • Why shame is often mistaken for spiritual discipline

  • The difference between conviction and self-criticism

  • Why regulation comes before real change

  • How grace fuels endurance, not complacency

Resources mentioned: Kristin Neff article on self-compassion → https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35961039/ Renewed Mind app → https://renewedmind.app

Starting in February, Diamonds in Dumpster Fires will move to a bi-weekly release schedule, with new episodes on the first and third Wednesdays of each month.

Grace grows better fruit than shame ever could.

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Diamonds in Dumpster FiresBy Melie Williams