You know how when someone says you look good for your age, you think, hmm, is that really a compliment? Because if they thought you looked good, they'd say you look good, and not qualify it with "for your age."

Anyway, happy 250th birthday, America! You look good for your age!

Here's our birthday tribute. It's a parody of Robert Palmer's "Simply Irresistible." Of course.

Boston Tea Partiers:

M. Spaff Sumsion: Lyrics

Robert Lund: All vocals, all instruments, all everything else

P.S. Check out the video!

P.P.S. No AI was used in the writing of the lyrics or performance of the music. For the video, AI generated the images Spaff requested, but Spaff did everything else. Hooray for (not-yet-fully obsolete) humans.