Whisky-distiller Franca can't choose between the two men in her life, but an unlikely trip to Mars might just make her (omnipresent?) mind up. Oh, and there's also an EXTREMELY annoying character called Mitchum.

Title: What Goes On When The Lights Come Back On

Main Character: Franca

Strange Secret: She's not a human

Featured Location: A crater on Mars

Sponsored by: The shameless plugging of sausages