Sex 101 and Relationships

“I just don’t feel like myself anymore.” For many women navigating menopause, those words can include changes in sexual desire, comfort, and intimacy that are difficult to explain—and too often left unspoken.

In this episode of Sex 101, Daniel Lucas welcomes Dr. Lori Davis, a nurse practitioner and certified sex counselor, for an open conversation about sex after menopause: what no one tells you and what actually helps.

Dr. Davis discusses how menopause can affect sexual comfort, lubrication, desire, and orgasm. She introduces genitourinary syndrome of menopause (GSM) and explains why symptoms such as painful sex and urinary changes deserve attention from a qualified healthcare professional.

The conversation also explores why sexual health can benefit from both medical care and emotional support. Drawing on her work in sexual medicine, counseling, and relationships, Dr. Davis describes an approach that considers the body, personal experiences, and the connections between partners.

Topics include recognizing changes, finding menopause-informed care, discussing treatment options with your provider, and approaching intimacy with curiosity and confidence. Menopause can be an opportunity to reconsider what feels good and create new ways to connect.

Listen to Sex 101, part of Universal Podcast Network, for an honest conversation about sexual health and intimacy through life’s changes.

This episode provides general education and does not replace personalized medical advice.

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Urology and sexual medicine nurse practitioner Dr. Stephanie Swanson joins Daniel Lucas on Sex 101 to discuss men’s sexual health beyond erectile dysfunction. They explore how testosterone, libido, stress, anxiety, relationship challenges, sleep, nutrition, and exercise can affect desire and sexual function. Dr. Swanson also explains why emotional well-being matters and why persistent concerns are worth discussing with a qualified health professional. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com

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Sex 101 | Xanet Pailet: Why Desire Disappears in Long-Term Relationships Rebuilding Intimacy, Attraction & Passion

What happens when two people still love each other deeply, but the passion that once brought them together begins to fade?

Why do couples who once experienced intense attraction gradually find themselves struggling with sexual desire, emotional connection, and physical intimacy?

And perhaps the most important question: Can the spark that once defined a relationship be rediscovered after years of disconnection?

Sex 101, presented by Universal Podcast Network, welcomes Xanet Pailet, sex and intimacy educator, relationship coach, and experienced advocate for helping individuals and couples develop healthier relationships with intimacy and sexuality.

With approximately 15 years of professional experience in sex and intimacy education, Xanet brings a deeply personal perspective shaped by her own experience of living in a sexless marriage for more than two decades.

During that period, she describes feeling disconnected from her body, sexuality, and intimate relationship.

Her journey toward rediscovering personal connection eventually inspired her to help others navigate similar challenges.

For the past several years, Xanet has focused extensively on working with couples experiencing differences in sexual desire, declining attraction, intimacy difficulties, and emotional disconnection.

Her work explores how partners can move beyond shame, obligation, and routine toward more honest communication, mutual understanding, and fulfilling relationships.

WHY DOES SEXUAL DESIRE DISAPPEAR?

In this compelling conversation with Daniel Lucas, Xanet explains why the intense attraction experienced during the early stages of romantic relationships often changes over time.

She describes the initial period of falling in love as the new relationship energy stage, when excitement, novelty, and powerful emotional experiences can contribute to heightened attraction.

According to Xanet, this early intensity often begins to change as relationships become more established.

She introduces a framework involving different stages of long-term relationships, including a validation stage in which some couples may begin using sexual intimacy as reassurance that their partner still loves and desires them.

Over time, sexual intimacy can begin to feel like an obligation rather than a mutually desired experience.

Partners may become less spontaneous, stop communicating openly about their needs, or find themselves repeating familiar routines that no longer create the same excitement.

But changes in sexual desire are not necessarily signs that love has disappeared.

Sexual interest can be influenced by stress, relationship satisfaction, physical health, medications, hormonal changes, emotional well-being, and individual differences in desire.

Understanding these influences can help couples approach intimacy challenges with greater compassion rather than blame.

IN THIS EPISODE, EXPLORE:

Why Desire Changes in Long-Term Relationships

Discover why sexual attraction and intimacy may evolve as couples move beyond the early stages of romance.

The New Relationship Energy Stage

Explore Xanet's perspective on the excitement, novelty, and emotional intensity that often accompany falling in love.

Understanding the Validation Stage

Learn why some partners begin seeking reassurance through sexual intimacy and how this pattern can affect their relationship.

When Sex Becomes an Obligation

Examine why intimacy can lose its emotional meaning when partners feel pressured to participate rather than genuinely connected.

The Reality of Sexless Marriages

Hear how Xanet's personal experience influenced her understanding of sexual disconnection and relationship challenges.

Why Couples Lose the Spark

Explore how familiarity, repetitive routines, unresolved conflict, and changing life circumstances can influence attraction.

Emotional Intimacy and Physical Desire

Discover how trust, communication, emotional safety, and relationship satisfaction can interact with sexual connection.

The Role of Communication

Understand why couples benefit from discussing their desires, boundaries, expectations, and concerns without judgment.

Different Levels of Sexual Desire

Explore how partners can navigate differences in sexual interest while respecting each other's autonomy and consent.

Reconnecting After Years of Distance

Discuss ways couples may rebuild closeness through affection, meaningful conversations, shared experiences, and mutually comfortable intimacy.

Moving Beyond Shame and Pressure

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Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com

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What happens when you step outside the life you have always known? In this episode of Sex 101, Daniel Lucas welcomes Michelena Rose, a sex and relationship coach, massage therapist, mother of three, and self-described Playboy Playmate, for a candid conversation about dating, relationships, and discovering your true self.

With humor and honesty, Michelena shares stories about men and dating, alongside reflections on leaving her small town and finding the courage to pursue a different life. Together, they explore how familiar expectations can shape our choices and why taking a risk can open the door to personal growth.

Join us for an engaging conversation about confidence, connection, and embracing who you are.

Listener advisory: Adult themes and sexual discussions. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com

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Sex 101, in its third season, features “The Chemistry of Commitment: Why the Modern Hookup Fails the Ancient Brain, Part 3.”

In this third installment, we continue exploring the complex intersection of sex, attachment, attraction, intimacy, and commitment in the modern dating world.

Human relationships have changed dramatically, but the biological systems involved in bonding and attachment developed over a much longer evolutionary timeline. What happens when dating apps, casual encounters, endless choices, and rapidly changing relationship expectations interact with brains that still form powerful emotional and social bonds?

This episode examines the roles associated with dopamine, oxytocin, reward, desire, attachment, novelty, and emotional connection, while separating popular claims about “brain chemistry” from what relationship science can actually support.

We also explore why two people can experience the same intimate encounter very differently, why physical attraction does not automatically produce emotional compatibility, and why communication and expectations matter when navigating casual or committed relationships.

Part 3 goes beyond asking whether hookup culture is simply “good” or “bad.” Instead, it asks a deeper question: Are modern relationship structures always compatible with what individuals emotionally and psychologically need from intimacy?

Join Sex 101 as we continue examining the chemistry of commitment and the complicated relationship between our ancient biology and modern romantic lives. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com

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In this episode of Sex 101, we explore a part of sexual anatomy that is often overlooked: the penis and clitoris develop from related embryonic tissue, and both contain erectile tissue. Why is one commonly discussed in sexual health education while the other is so often left out?

We discuss how erections work, why much of the clitoris is not externally visible, and what these shared features could mean for conversations about sexual function. We also look at FirmTech’s work on measuring erectile responses, including its proposed Clitique device, which the company says is still in development.

Join us for a candid conversation about anatomy, better questions, and why sexual health research needs to take more bodies into account. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com

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What really happens to sexual intimacy during and after menopause—and why do so many women feel like they are suddenly no longer themselves?

In this insightful conversation, Dr. Lori Davis, a nurse practitioner and certified sex counselor, explores the physical, emotional, and relational changes that can affect sexuality during menopause. Drawing from her experience in sexual medicine, somatic work, and relationship therapy, Dr. Davis explains why changes in desire, discomfort during sex, and differences in orgasm can occur—and why these experiences do not necessarily mean that a fulfilling sex life is over.

The conversation also challenges the idea that menopause should automatically signal sexual decline. Instead, it explores how this stage of life can become an opportunity to understand the body differently, strengthen communication, reconsider intimacy, and create a new relationship with sexuality.

Most importantly, Dr. Davis emphasizes that women experiencing sexual changes deserve accurate information, compassionate care, and evidence-based support.

Sex after menopause can be different—but different does not have to mean finished. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com

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Keri Green is a clinical sex therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist with more than 20 years of experience supporting children, teenagers, adults, couples, and families. Throughout her career, she discovered that her deepest passion lies in helping adults and couples navigate relationships, intimacy, desire, pleasure, vulnerability, and emotional connection. This calling ultimately inspired her to transform her private practice and dedicate it entirely to sex therapy.

Keri believes everyone deserves the opportunity to feel comfortable discussing sex and sexuality without fear, embarrassment, or shame. She also emphasizes the importance of helping people develop greater confidence and comfort within their own bodies. Her work provides a safe, compassionate environment for adults and couples who have questions about their sexuality, are healing from trauma, or want to communicate more openly and honestly with their partners.

Whether she is supporting someone in a new relationship or a couple who has shared decades together, Keri helps people replace silence and discomfort with understanding, trust, and genuine connection. Her approach encourages individuals to explore their needs, express their feelings, and build healthier intimate relationships at a pace that feels safe for them. By challenging the taboos surrounding sexuality, she reminds us that healing and deeper intimacy become possible when people feel heard, respected, and accepted. As Keri powerfully explains, everything starts with a conversation. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com

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Amy Reiley is a certified nutrition coach and one of the world’s leading experts on aphrodisiac foods. The creator of the award-winning Eat Something Sexy website, her work has appeared everywhere from Playboy to National Geographic. She holds a Master’s Degree in Gastronomy from Le Cordon Bleu and has shared her food-first approach to sexual health on The Today Show, NPR’s Wait Wait... Don’t Tell Me!, and the hit podcast My Dad Wrote a Porno.

Amy is the author of five aphrodisiac cookbooks, including the award-winning Romancing the Stove. Her latest, Eat Cake Naked, shows how desserts can sweeten your love life. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com

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