Sexcess Story

In episode 8 we hear from Lena McCain, a therapist and person who lives with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (EDS) and POTS. In this episode, you will learn:

-That there's 13 different types of EDS

-Many people who have EDS also have POTS

-How it is commonly diagnosed and how she treats it

-What sexual accommodations she has made

-That the brain cannot exist without the body

-What it's like to accept her body is not an inconvenience

Here's how to get ahold of Lena:

Follow me on Instagram @sexcess_story

[email protected]

Lena's bio:

Lena McCain is the Founder of Interfaith Bridge Counseling, where she continues her

support as the Clinical Director. She also holds a Master of Arts degree in Clinical

Mental Health: Mindfulness-Based Transpersonal Counseling Psychology from Naropa

University.

Lena’s drive and passions lie in person-centered, liberation-based mental health, which

she has spent the last 12 years studying with an emphasis on one’s exploration of

personal growth, community healing, and multicultural values. Lena’s expertise in these

areas and the therapeutic field acts as a reminder to our community, teens, and young

adults that they are not alone in their experience of life.

Lena spends most of her time working alongside other individuals and organizations,

helping to foster brave spaces for more transformative, connected experiences. Lena

lives in Denver, Colorado with her partner, Brandon. They have two Shar Peis named

Yia Yia and Bao, and one Terrier Mix named Mimosa.

www.podchaser.com/sexcessstory

Meaghan and I decided to record part 2 because we felt there were so many things we weren't able to get into or discuss further. After receiving questions from people, we decided the sexuality part of Meaghan's story deserved more. We will also try to answer all the questions as best as we can. 

***Content Warning***

We will be discussing intimate partner violence, unwanted sexual experiences, and how Meaghan deals with the lasting effects now.

Heather is looking for individuals and couples to tell your story on her podcast! Here is how you can get in touch with her!

Instagram: @Sexcess_Story

Facebook: Heather DeKeyser-Smith

Email: [email protected] 

Today we hear from Megan about how her abusive marriage affected her life, her sexuality, her substance use and her health. Abusive relationships are common, and everyone copes differently. Megan discusses how she coped, or didn't, and how she was eventually able to leave that relationship and put herself and her sexuality "back together". 

"I had the perfect house, the perfect family, the perfect marriage; and all it cost me was my life."

***Content Warning***

This episode includes language and stories about substance use, sexual and intimate partner violence and unwanted sexual experiences. Listener discretion is advised. Please practice tons of self care and take breaks, listen with a trusted person, or talk about your reactions with a therapist or friend.

Heather is looking for individuals and couples to tell your story on her podcast! Here is how you can get in touch with her!

Instagram: @Sexcess_Story

Facebook: Heather DeKeyser-Smith

Email: [email protected]

When you lose sexy to cancer, how do you get it back again? This question, and many more, will be answered in this podcast! In episode 6, Heather and Jeni B have discussions about breast cancer, being broken up with because of a diagnosis, losing and finding yourself in the DARK, and what it means when mental strength means just wanting to "punch a bitch". Listen to all of this, and so much more about bringing sexy back to cancer!!

What you will learn:

-8 years in a relationship does not protect you from a cancer diagnosis

-how different women define mental strength

-how JB learned from the dark that she would survive

-what you can find sexy when every part of sexy is gone from cancer/chemo

Heather is looking for individuals and couples to tell your story on her podcast! Here is how you can get in touch with her!

Instagram: @Sexcess_Story

Facebook: Heather DeKeyser-Smith

Email: [email protected]

**This episode is dedicated to Susan, my dear friend who is losing her battle with lung cancer. Susan, I met you during chemo, when no one could be with us because it was during COVID and we made our own entertainment, and talked about what we would do when we were done with that shit, even though you knew you never would be unless it meant you were near the end. Your hair made, and will always make, me smile the biggest smile when I'm sad or down. No one will ever understand my love of the word fuck more than you, and I'll keep saying it so you don't have to. I love you.**

Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays <3

In episode 5, Heather interviews Hannah Krumreich, who's battled Endo and Adeno for 13 years! She hasn't been able to tell her story until now, and she tells all about her battle with illness, sex, body image, suicide, doctors, surgery after surgery, and finding a way to move from hopeless to hopeful. Hannah does not preach being positive; instead she encourages others to find support, find themselves, and find love, but not where you'd think!

In this episode you'll learn:

-What is Endometriosis & Adenomyosis; key difference between the two

-On overage, how long it takes to get a diagnosis and why

-How there is no prevention, no real screening, and no cure

-How she learned to deal with chronic illness and how unhealthy it was

-What giving up looks like, but how to decide to fight stronger, advocate for yourself and literally move through pain

-What it's like viewing sex through the eyes of Endo & Adeno and how she is still figuring this out

Feel free to contact Hannah with questions:

Instagram @hannah_runs26.2

Email: [email protected]

Heather is looking for individuals and couples to tell your story on her podcast! Here is how you can get in touch with her!

Instagram: @Sexcess_Story

Facebook: Heather DeKeyser-Smith

Email: [email protected]

In episode 4, Heather interviews her fellow breastie and breast cancer survivor, Erin Henry. Erin talks about what it was like to get diagnosed, go through treatment during COVID, and how cancer affected her relationship with herself and others, and of course....sex! Everyone is going to take something different from this episode, from what's helpful for sex during cancer, to where your faith comes from, and how nature and horses can help our self-esteem and sense of self!

What you will learn:

-What Erin does for a living, and how this helped her during cancer

-Just what a "breastie" is

-What Erin found to be helpful in keeping her sex life alive being in the "honeymoon" stage of her relationship at the time of diagnosis

-What cancer took, and what cancer gave her

Erin's contact info: Instagram @erinhenrymsw

                             Email: [email protected]

Heather is looking for individuals and couples to interview to be on the podcast or to tell your story on her podcast! Here is how you can get in touch with her!

Instagram: @Sexcess_Story

Facebook: Heather DeKeyser-Smith

Email: [email protected]

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In episode 3, Heather talks about visible and invisible pain; what's often easier to talk about and what's easier to hide when it comes to physical, emotional and mental pain. And it's not just related to illness and cancer. Everyone has pain, and we all makes choices about how to handle it. Today we talk about pain as it relates to being terrorized by a spider, liking to wash dishes, and cancer and treatment sucking; oh and how we all lie and hide constantly.

Takeaways from today:

-Pain can be physical, emotional and mental; visible and invisable

-We are good at hiding and judging pain but the "cancer didn't stop me" mentality is actually harmful

-Living with pain can feel like multiple personalities

-Judging pain only works if we know what purpose it already has in our life

-Intimacy is hard; not being intimate is hard; choose your hard

-If you experience pain, physical or emotional or mental, &/or hide from it, you are not alone

Heather is looking for individuals and couples to interview to be on the podcast or to tell your story on her podcast! Here is how you can get in touch with her!

Instagram: @Sexcess_Story

Facebook: Heather DeKeyser-Smith

Email: [email protected]

In episode 2, you meet Heather's husband, Jeremy, who was also her caretaker through cancer. They share stories of getting a diagnosis and what it was like having to build intimacy through the challenges of chemotherapy and the physical pain that accompanied it. They also tell, though, that cancer is not their first trip through chronic pain/illness & sexual challenges. They give feedback on what was most helpful during treatment, what was really challenging, and offer words of encouragement to others who may be going through something similar.

Takeaways from today:

-Heather & Jeremy have had 10 years of dealing with chronic pain and sexual issues, which not many people know about them

-How an illness affects a couple emotionally, psychologically and sexually

-Intimacy can be built during treatment, whether sex is happening or not

-Having support systems are key in beating an illness; communication with loved ones is key!

Heather is looking for individuals and couples to interview to be on the podcast or to tell your story on her podcast! Here is how you can get in touch with her!

Instagram: @Sexcess_Story

Facebook: Heather DeKeyser-Smith

Email: [email protected]

In the first-ever episode of Sexcess Story, you meet your host, Heather DeKeyser, as she shares where this podcast began. It all started exactly a year ago today, with her own diagnosis of triple negative breast cancer. She tells all, including how her dog found her cancer, being afraid of losing the business she spent 8 years building, and how her diagnosis rocked her family and her marriage. Now, a year later, she is cancer-free, stilling running a successful business doing sex therapy, and beginning this podcast to help others understand the impact illness and treatment have on people's relationships and sex lives. Follow along as Heather, and her sister Carissa, share details of her cancer no one has ever heard before. 

Takeaways from today:

-Heather & Carissa have conversations even they have not had before this podcast episode about what it was like to be patient and caregiver during a cancer diagnosis

-How an illness affects someone emotionally, psychologically and sexually

-Sexual side effects of illness and treatment last long after treatment ends

-Having support systems are key in beating an illness, but even the books don’t tell us everything

-When we get sick, our sexual health and relationships with our self and others often get placed last on the priority list, but become one of the biggest areas of life affected, and most people do not feel like they can talk about it.

Heather is looking for individuals and couples to interview to be on the podcast or to tell your story on her podcast! Here is how you can get in touch with her!

Instagram: @Sexcess_Story

Website: www.hopetherapeutics.org

Facebook: Heather DeKeyser-Smith

Email: [email protected]