SHOW NOTES
Episode 347: When the Holidays Amplify Loss: How to Support (and Be Supported) Through Grief
Guest: Samina Bari, Author of "Don't Call Me Widow" and Host of "The Afterlife" Podcast
WHY THIS CONVERSATION MATTERS NOW
The holidays are coming. For many of us, that means gratitude lists and celebration. But for someone navigating loss, it means an empty chair at the table, traditions that feel incomplete, and well-meaning friends who don't know what to say.
This week, I'm talking with Samina Bari, who lost her husband in a sudden accident while raising young twins. Samina talks about living through the devastating comments ("At least you're young"), awkward silences, and the lonely work of grief. And she's turned that experience into a mission: helping both those who are grieving and those who desperately want to help but don't know how.
Whether you're supporting someone through loss right now or want to be prepared to show up when it matters most, Samina's insights will change how you think about grief, presence, and what real support looks like.
MEET SAMINA BARI
Samina is a communications professional who never expected to become an expert on grief. After an accident took her husband's life, she found herself not only navigating unbearable pain but also supporting her twins, rebuilding her sense of self, and discovering that nearly everything people said to her missed the mark. Her book "Don't Call Me Widow" and her podcast "The Afterlife" emerged from her determination to create the guidance she wished she'd had—for the grieving and for those who love them.
WHAT YOU'LL TAKE AWAY FROM THIS EPISODE
Words That Wound (And What to Say Instead): Discover why phrases like "they're in a better place" and "everything happens for a reason" can feel like daggers, and learn the simple, powerful alternatives that actually provide comfort.
How to Show Up When You Don't Know What to Do: Presence trumps perfection. Samina shares the small, tangible actions that meant the most to her: from sitting in silence to taking on specific tasks without asking permission. You'll learn how to help without adding to someone's burden.
Understanding the Identity Earthquake of Loss: Losing a spouse isn't just grief, it's a complete identity shift. Samina explains why this is uniquely disorienting and why treating grief like a problem to solve actually makes it worse.
Supporting Children Through Grief (Without Making Them Invisible): Kids process loss differently than adults, but they're often overlooked entirely. Learn meaningful ways to acknowledge and support children who are grieving—without making them carry adult emotions.
Navigating the Minefield of Holiday Gatherings: As we head into the season of celebration, how do we make space for those experiencing painful absences? Samina offers practical guidance for being inclusive and thoughtful during emotionally charged times.
The Financial Reality No One Talks About: In the wake of loss, Samina discovered a crucial truth: women's financial empowerment isn't just practical, it's essential. She shares why this matters and how to start those conversations before crisis hits.
Samina's wisdom is both heart-wrenching and practical. It’s the kind of conversation that stays with you long after it ends.
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Wishing you a joyful, resilient, gratitude-filled Thanksgiving—thank you for being part of this community!
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