She's Talking Back

It’s just Michelle this episode! Michelle gets a bit emotional this episode because she recalls a bit of her traumatic past and why she felt like she needed to ‘not be heard.’ She’s been practicing breathing three deep and meaningful breaths lately because one of the negative mechanisms she has developed was to hold her breath. More on how to work on your mechanism in this week’s solo episode!

Key Takeaways

• You need to go into the mental gym and work on yourself from the inside.
• You have exactly what it takes to change the world.
• You always have a choice!
• How do you go to the mental gym?
• Michelle’s parents were teenagers when she was born.
• Because they were so young, they were still figuring out how to communicate with one another. There was a lot of yelling.
• Michelle thought if she was quiet, the yelling would stop. And this is how ‘Seen but not heard’ came to be in her mind.
• Michelle gets a bit emotional remembering why she stopped breathing.
• Michelle’s mechanism of not breathing is not serving her! So, how is she trying to stop it?
• The mechanisms you have in place today served you at one point.

Resources

“Don’t Be Afraid to Fall” — Brené Brown

Quotes

“I believe in leadership from the inside out.”

“You have exactly what it takes to change the world, but it won’t be on your terms or your timeline.”

“We have negative and positive mechanisms in place. The negative ones have served you in some way, but they’re not serving you right now.”

Susan Eick thought she had to act like a man in order to get invited into the corporate boy's club, but it wasn't working! The harder she tried, the fewer things she got invited to, and to top it off, it was exhausting! Why pretend to be something you're not? Susan has learned over the years that being your authentic self is the best way to lead and have people respect/admire you. Women/Men have natural talents and we should leverage them, not try to act like each other.

Key Takeaways

• ● Leadership is a people's game.
• ● Leaders are having time now to really take a step back and analyze where their time is going.
• ● As leaders take more digital meetings, they're not scheduling time for breaks and so they end up feeling more exhausted than before.
• ● Sometimes it can be difficult to innovate, there's a lot of testing that goes into it or they might not have a budget so they don't prioritize it, but Susan is seeing that so many leaders had to innovate overnight due to the pandemic.
• ● They didn't think they had innovation in them, but they were wrong! They were able to get things up and running with no budget, within a week.
• ● Susan explains the difference in culture in Canada vs. the U.S.
• ● What risks are out there for a modern leader?
• ● There's a pent up demand for getting this back to normal as quickly as possible and leaders are forgetting that you still need to communicate to your team!
• ● Susan's first employee retreat, she didn't know if it went well or not. Fast forward to her latest one and she's never felt more connected. The biggest shift in this was Susan and being more open/authentic to her team.
• ● When Susan was coming up in her corporate career, she had to look like a guy and show no emotions.
• ● Susan realized she couldn't be someone she wasn't, so when she started opening up and showing more of her personality, that's when more doors opened for her.
• ● What's next for Susan?
• ● Susan's daughters have better female role models than she did when she was growing up. She is very hopeful for the future.
• Resources
• Refineryleadership.com
• Susan on LinkedIn
• Quotes
• Michelle's quote: "There is a level of importance around keeping the intimacy around human connection and leaders with their team."
• "Leadership's a people's game and we've forgotten that. In the past we thought it was a title, status, responsibility, and people get pushed down."
• "Leaders I've been talking to have said that they're forced to innovate overnight. We have this need and we have to act on it now."
• "Work says they want your best you, but what if your best you is something that is not as beautiful and polished as what they've experienced in the past?"

Michelle Tenzyk advises and coaches CEOs and senior-level executives to create company cultures that attract and retain critical talent at all levels. Michelle shares something so important in today's episode — Tell your story and speak your truth. It's going to be difficult; there will be many people who judge you online, but the more of us that share our story, the easier it will be to bring those walls down!

Key Takeaways

• ● The ability to live in the moment helps manage the constant uncertainty around us.
• ● For most of us, life tends to be more certain. We have routines and there's a sense of comfort happening.
• ● How can women better manage this feeling of 'everything is out of control'?
• ● Look at your feet. Where are your feet right now? This helps bring Michelle back to the present.
• ● What you're experiencing right now is temporary. It will get better. There will be an ending.
• ● Put your oxygen mask on first! Really! Do it!
• ● Leaders are not worried about their people, but about themselves and their family. There's a lot going on.
• ● People are now seeing the inside of your homes and it's opened up for more connection because people can ask about the pictures, etc, that are in your background! Embrace this connection.
• ● We need to break the walls down!
• ● Michelle talks about how online criticism really affected her and how she was able to manage through that.
• ● When Michelle's story went viral, she was ready for everything that would get thrown at her because she had done the work.
• ● Sharing your story gives people hope! By telling our story one at a time, the walls will come down.
• ● There will be judgments made against you. Michelle can't tell you that the path will be rosy.
• Resources
• Easttenthgroup.com
• Michelle on LinkedIn
• Brené Brown
• Quotes
• Michelle's quote: "It's really an honor to be able to create meaningful conversations with powerful women that exude compassion, thoughtfulness, and truth."
• "Look at my feet. Where are my feet right now? I'm planted right here, right now. To help me bring me back to the moment."
• "The situation I'm in right now is temporary. They will be another side to this. Most of the time I don't know how long temporary is."
• "In the corporate and the business world, we need to hear stories like this. We need to know we're not alone. We need to know there's hope."

Karen Leland is a Branding and Marketing Strategist and Implementer. There are a lot of things she's seeing right now in the online space that are making her go, 'Oh, no!' As people are starting to get used to working from home and going digital, some of the 'standard' ways of how we are doing business are going away, like wearing professional clothing during a meeting! Your personal brand can do so much for you during this time as more people are looking online to find the right candidate to get the job done.

Key Takeaways

• ● Karen's theatrical background helped set her up for success in her career because she could speak and present topics and ideas really well.
• ● How many times have you been to a cocktail party and you still don't know what that person does after 30 minutes of talking? People everywhere struggle with being clear in what they do.
• ● It can take Karen three to six hours just to help people articulate their brand clearly.
• ● After the pandemic, there are going to be so many opportunities for branding clarity because people are moving to a more digital model.
• ● Should people really care about LinkedIn?
• ● Companies that don't have a social media presence are missing out.
• ● CEOs are having their own personal website to showcase more of who they are.
• ● It's important to do the research so that you know what to focus on and when. You only have a limited number of resources.
• ● People have been working on their 'brand' for six years, but are surprised that they can get clarity and vision within one day after working with Karen. You just need to ask the right questions.
• ● It's so important to be precise in your language so you can get interest and the right kind of interest from the right kinds of people.
• ● When does it make sense to hire a branding consultant or coach?
• ● Journalists don't want to interview or feature people with a poor social media presence because it makes them look bad as a writer/researcher that they didn't properly 'vet' their sources.
• ● The key is to have a strategy that's based on research.
• ● Color plays a huge role in our daily life, which is why it's important to get your color schemes down right in a webinar.
• ● Also, how you dress and what's behind your background is super important too!
• Resources
• Sterlingmarketinggroup.com
• Karen on LinkedIn
• Karen on Twitter
• Quotes
• Michelle's quote: "All you need is one great insight to go, 'Ah! I can now go implement or make the shift.'"
• "One of the post-COVID-19 changes is going to be, people are really going to be digging into the substance of who that person is, what do they know, rather than just the hope and the hype."
• "People make these assumptions but they're not based on anything. They're just based on their opinion and not on research."
• "If you ask the right questions and people are looking in the right places, you can come up with what you need."

Sylvia Rohde-Liebenau is a leadership development expert and an EMCC accredited coach. Her expertise and insights will blow you away. Although she originally started on a path of international relations, she found her calling towards helping women find their strength and the confidence to lead. She talks about why expressing your personality/quirks is a blessing, how to find stillness within yourself, and that leadership is always going to be a continuous journey.

Key Takeaways

• Sylvia shares what her colleagues are concerned about when it comes to virtual teams.
• It's more important than ever to communicate clearly and have empathy with your team as we work virtually.
• What are the biggest risk leaders are facing when things go back to 'normal'?
• Sylvia got her start as a scholar in international relations and did her Ph.D. in East/West conflict and systemic change.
• Sylvia has seen that when people are in the corporate world, people are asked to stay in a certain mold that suppresses your true personality.
• Sylvia was able to reconnect with herself by enjoying hobbies outside of her work, like art and dance.
• It's important to not lose sight that high-achieving executives are still people at the core and have the same needs and wants as you do.
• In Sylvia's heart, leadership really matters.
• When working with the younger generation, Sylvia is so hopeful for the future.
• Sometimes Sylvia doesn't always get the leadership piece down right. She shares an example and a bit of vulnerability on how she could be better at this.
• Why is stillness so important for leaders?
• Sylvia loves the idea of hosting a movement or dance workshop to help leaders find stillness.
• How do you know in your gut/heart what you're doing is the right thing?
• Sylvia's improv teacher told her to stop mixing feelings and thinking together! Sit down and feel, do not think.

Resources

Connect4impact.eu

Sylvia on LinkedIn

Quotes

Michelle's quote: "At the core of Sylvia is leadership. You're going to hear her say, leadership matters, and taking a lead and standing up for what you believe is the core of her being."

"One of my students said, 'I have to take leadership for my own life.'"

"Live our lives to the full; that means we have to take courage and step up and make decisions that might not feel comfortable."

"Today there's much more talk about doing what's right for you. Who are you? What do you want?"

Susan Frew felt like hiding under a rock after her employee stole from her and took a considerable amount of money out of the business. Despite winning 43 awards and winning Inc. 500, her mental health struggled and so did her business while all of this was going on. The biggest takeaway was that she let her ego get in the way and it didn't allow her to properly recover from the incident, but after taking deliberate and intentional action on her miracle journal and being grateful, Susan has come out of this more successful than ever.

Key Takeaways

• ● Unfortunately, the internet wasn't too good and the interview got cut a little short, but because this information is so timely, we're releasing it!
• ● When an elephant is giving birth, the other female elephants in the tribe surround her to protect her.
• ● When Susan's company came under attack from a cybercrime, she let her mental health go.
• ● Susan won Inc. 500 and her business dreams were coming true, but she felt like she was a fraud because of what was really going on underneath it all.
• ● Susan started a miracle journal where she would write down all the miracles that were happening in her life.
• ● What did Susan need to see differently that she couldn't see at the time?
• ● Susan was forced to downgrade the business and sell some of her possessions because of this cybercrime.
• ● The initial response is wanting to hide, but in crisis, we have to not let our egos get in the way.
• Resources
• Susanrobertsfrew.com
• Quotes
• Michelle's quote: "We are in a time of crisis and Susan has applicable experience of leading self and others through crisis!"
• "I found community and then I really I ended up finding, the one word is hope."
• "When you put gratitude up into the clouds, the clouds will rain down blessings."
• "The more I wrote my miracles down and the more I became profoundly and intentionally grateful, that's when things started turning around."

Chinwe Esimai, an award-winning lawyer and the first person to hold the title of Chief Anti-Bribery Officer at Citigroup, has achieved many great things throughout her career. Her story will inspire you and help you overcome any challenges you might be facing today! This podcast episode highlights why leadership is critical to your success as a woman, the importance of mentorship, and coming to the U.S. as an immigrant!

Key Takeaways

• Chinwe right now is trying to figure out the best ways to navigate the uncertainty that we're dealing with right now.
• Chinwe had to take a step back and ask herself, 'What am I being called to do today? To be today?'
• There are always events in our lives that are calling us to act, but we need to be intentional on how to act and if it's true to how we want to show up in the world.
• Chinwe's path as a lawyer wasn't exactly 'traditional.' She tried out different things to find her passion.
• Chinwe compares her experience at Goldman Sachs vs. Citigroup.
• Chinwe explains how she transitioned from basically operating as a solo-women to all of a sudden having a global team to back her up. It comes down to empowering and mentoring your people to do good work!
• Ask yourself proactive questions like, 'What have I learned from that?' or 'What could I have done differently?' and take those lessons and move forward.
• It's a delicate balance when it comes to social media. You want to promote what you're doing, but you also want to be authentic and true to yourself.
• Chinwe was teaching a class and noticed that out of the 2 women in a 15-person class, they never spoke up during class!
• What can immigrant women leaders do better to support other immigrant women?
• What were some of the challenges that Chinwe experienced when she first came to the United States?
• At the most senior levels, women are not breaking through!

Resources

Chinweesimai.com

Chinwe on LinkedIn

"How immigrant professionals can make a perceived disadvantage their biggest strength"

Quotes

Michelle's quote: "It's bringing up the emotions of how proud I feel about this woman and how thankful I am that I now get to call her a colleague, friend, and guest of the show."

"Leadership is always relevant."

"Part of the transition is trusting and being able to empower people to make decisions."

"The men spoke all the time. They always had an opinion and were incredibly confident. And then, here's this woman with the best ideas but was not speaking up."

Deborah Rosati is an accomplished corporate director, entrepreneur, Fellow Chartered Professional Accountant and Certified Corporate Director with more than 30 years of experience in technology, consumer retail, private equity, and more! Deborah shares what women can do today to prepare to get on a board and how to navigate these unclear waters while managing your full-time executive job. No matter what, do not get discouraged. You are in the position you're in for a reason!

Key Takeaways

• Successful and well-accomplished women are struggling with confidence.
• How did Deborah get started as a corporate director?
• Deborah went into business because she wanted to be a businessman like her father.
• Knowledge is power, which is why Deborah strives to be a life-long learner.
• Deborah shares her story of how she got into helping women get on boards before it became 'trendy.'
• What were some of Deborah's personal challenges being in a room full of men?
• Deborah made sure she showed up before the meeting would start and made sure she could attend every meeting in person.
• Deborah broke down barriers when she joined a board where everybody knew each other for years and years and she was the outsider.
• Building relationships hasn't changed. You need trust in almost anything you do.
• What types of challenges are women facing right now when trying to be on a board?
• You can't have a laundry list of what you're offering. You have to niche down and be very intentional on what skill sets you want to bring to a board. Highlight just your top skills.
• How can a woman relatively new in her executive career get on a board five to 10 years from now?
• Deborah sees a lot of women in her workshops struggle with confidence and some do not feel qualified to take the next step in their career.
• You deserve to be in the boardroom!
• If you get a 'no,' ask them why. Use it as a learning opportunity and stay positive.
• What are you doing to prepare and create that runaway for your future?

Resources

Evolutionizemedia.com/podcasts/shes-talking-back

Deborahrosati.ca

Womengetonboard.ca

Quotes

Michelle's quote: "The most common area of support Deborah has to offer her members, women who are seeking corporate board positions, is around the area of confidence."

"I had to find other ways to build communication and build rapport. I wasn't golfing with the men or racing sports cars with them, or smoking cigars and drinking scotch with them. I had to find other ways to build trust."

"I made that conscious commitment to keep showing up and being present and not going away. People started seeing me as contributing and trusting."

"I didn't get discouraged by it. I knew I was there for a reason."

Afifa Siddiqui runs three companies and they're all remote. Although this was not planned, Afifa comes in at an excellent time to discuss how to set your company up for success if you're not usually used to remote work. She shares her tips and strategies to keep her employees engaged and ready to face a new day. She also shares how she handles self-doubt and how she has built resilience throughout her professional career.

● We're living in uncharted territory and people are looking to their government and leaders for guidance.

● Afifa has been running a remote company for a while now and can offer advice on how to better manage remote workers.

● Set up a proper communication channel with your team and then check in with them to ensure everybody is rowing in the same direction.

● Take this crisis a day at a time. We don't really know when it will be over.

● This is a stressful time, but that doesn't mean we can't have a little bit of watercooler talk. It's okay to share memes and funny tidbits throughout the day to keep things fun.

● You have to relax the expectation and really work through this together.

● Remember to bring more of the human element in when engaging a remote workforce.

● Why should people consider going remote?

● Afifa shares how she got started in her career field.

● How does Afifa handle self-doubt?

● Every company right now is discovering their pivot point and discovering on the fly where their next opportunity is.

● Afifa has taken on the risks of being a remote company and so she is fortunate that she is set up and well-prepared during this time.

Evolutionizemedia.com/podcasts/shes-talking-back/

Afifa on LinkedIn

Careerleaf.com

Canadianpayrollservices.com

Slack.com

Whatever way you might choose to frame it, freedom is something that, at the end of the day, all people do seek. Whether it's personal freedom and liberation from an oppressive environment or financial freedom, attaining freedom is a vital part of your journey because it opens up your world and your choices. Helen Raleigh is the Founder and CEO of Red Meadow Advisors, LLC, a wealth management firm. Together with Michelle McGlade, Helen tells her story of attaining freedom in all the most important aspects of her life. Don't let your world be limited; find the freedom to be who you want to be.