Shouldification often plays a part in the creation of stressful feelings. I know it is a made up word but I am sure you know exactly what it means. It is when we say something or someone should be different. In that moment it looks like we will feel better if the change happens. But we are misunderstanding where the feeling is coming from. The feeling is coming from the shouldification not the person or circumstance. When we realise that our feelings don't come from the outside world, the shouldification makes less and less sense; it feels awful after all. If you would like to stop shouldifiying, you know where I am.

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