Last night, President Biden delivered a speech that I needed. In it he said, “but I promise you the day will come a small the memory of the loved one you lost will bring a smile to your lips before a tear to your eye.” I know those days. I have more of them. But I still needed his speech.

Love is a transforming force. Mother’s love starts to develop as the child develops in the womb. Where does it go when the child dies? It needs a place to land. In came my Mylo.

Life comes at you. Life often sucks. Especially now with - just - everything. No matter though, there is always a bright side. Not mindless positivity thinking. Actual things in life that brighten your day. And maybe your outlook.

There should be a rule that once a woman loses her child, she is immune from any more loss, heartache, illness or suffering. It’s only fair. Though no such rule exists, because of who we are and what we’ve been through, we have what it takes to face what life throws at us.

When Charlie Brown would exclaim, “Good Grief,” he often held his head in his hands in anguish. It was always a negative response to something terrible that happened to him. If only he had known that Good Grief is possible. Us Mums know it. And we’re walking into the good of grief with purpose.

Life is not getting any easier. I’m preparing for new treatment for my eye disease and I’m not ready for any of it. And I’m smiling. Yes, I’m smiling. The pain and hurt is still there. My heart is still broken, but I’ve got a smile over my broken pieces.

Little Deaurra Nealy’s father said that she was a perfect child. We can certainly understand. Many parents feel that way about their angels. Sadly, Deaurra, known affectionately as “Aurri,” received her wings on January 16, 2021 due to complications from COVID-19. Children can die from this virus. Children are dying from this virus. And their parents are grieving. This is not a hoax.

This week, as a nation, we finally recognized that we are grieving. I needed that. I needed the nation to recognize the grief that necessarily hangs over us. We remember and honor each one. Your loved one is remembered. You who remain are remembered as you mourn. You are remembered. And I hold you in my prayers and heart.

People talk about getting back to “normal,” and the “new normal.” But normal left my life 17 years ago. I now live in my doable.

“I’m here. You’re not by yourself.” The words of Rontunda Moran as she held her 17 year old son, Jaquan Anderson’s hand as he died of heart failure complicated by COVID-19. This is not a hoax.